The Mechanics of Forgiveness
WORD STUDY Old Testament words related to forgiveness: Salach – Pardon Kipper – Atonement Nasa – Taking away
I acknowledged my sin to You, And my iniquity I did not hide; I said, “I will confess my transgressions to the Lord”; And You forgave the guilt of my sin. Selah. - Psalm 32:5
Acts of Mercy/Forgiveness in O.T. Spies sparing Rahab – Joshua 2:12-14 David sparing Mephibosheth – II Sam. 9:3 Esau reconciling with Jacob – Gen. 33 Joseph sparing his brothers – Gen. 50:15-21
GOD FORGIVENESS
Be kind to one another, tender-hearted, forgiving each other, just as God in Christ also has forgiven you. - Ephesians 4:32
21 Then Peter came and said to Him, “Lord, how often shall my brother sin against me and I forgive him? Up to seven times?” 22 Jesus said to him, “I do not say to you, up to seven times, but up to seventy times seven. - Matthew 18:21-22
How do I Forgive?
Forgiveness – Definitions Webster – Stop feelings of anger
Forgiveness – Definitions Webster – Stop feelings of anger Psychologist – Release negative feelings
Forgiveness – Definitions Webster – Stop feelings of anger Psychologist – Release negative feelings Bible – Let go
“And forgive us our sins, For we ourselves also forgive everyone who is indebted to us. And lead us not into temptation.” - Luke 11:4
Agape is the main motive for forgiveness
[Love] does not act unbecomingly; it does not seek its own, is not provoked, does not take into account a wrong suffered, - I Corinthians 13:5
What forgiveness is not Condoning offensive behavior
What forgiveness is not Condoning offensive behavior Pretending that the offense never happened
What forgiveness is not Condoning offensive behavior Pretending that the offense never happened Letting others take advantage of you
What forgiveness is not Condoning offensive behavior Pretending that the offense never happened Letting others take advantage of you Pardoning with no basis
13 He who conceals his transgressions will not prosper, But he who confesses and forsakes them will find compassion. 14 How blessed is the man who fears always, But he who hardens his heart will fall into calamity. - Proverbs 28:13-14
Cease from anger and forsake wrath; Do not fret; it leads only to evildoing. - Psalm 37:8
What forgiveness is not Condoning offensive behavior Pretending that the offense never happened Letting others take advantage of you Pardoning with no basis Forgiving every perceived offense and slight
Do not be eager in your heart to be angry, For anger resides in the bosom of fools. - Ecclesiastes 7:9
The Mechanics of Forgiveness
The Mechanics of Forgiveness Define the offense clearly and truthfully
DAVID & BATHSHEBA 1 Then the Lord sent Nathan to David. And he came to him and said, “There were two men in one city, the one rich and the other poor. 2 “The rich man had a great many flocks and herds. - II Samuel 12:1-2
“But the poor man had nothing except one little ewe lamb Which he bought and nourished; And it grew up together with him and his children. It would eat of his bread and drink of his cup and lie in his bosom, And was like a daughter to him. - II Samuel 12:3
“Now a traveler came to the rich man, And he was unwilling to take from his own flock or his own herd, To prepare for the wayfarer who had come to him; Rather he took the poor man’s ewe lamb and prepared it for the man who had come to him.” - II Samuel 12:4
5 Then David’s anger burned greatly against the man, and he said to Nathan, “As the Lord lives, surely the man who has done this deserves to die. 6 He must make restitution for the lamb fourfold, because he did this thing and had no compassion.” - II Samuel 12:5-6
Nathan then said to David, “You are the man! - II Samuel 12:7
David’s Hard Conscience Permitted Him to: Take another man’s wife
David’s Hard Conscience Permitted Him to: Take another man’s wife Plot a murder
David’s Hard Conscience Permitted Him to: Take another man’s wife Plot a murder Lie to the nation
One-size-fits-all forgiveness rarely brings closure.
“Until you find the true source of the offense and turn it off (through forgiveness), it will continue to leak negative emotions.”
The Mechanics of Forgiveness Define the offense clearly and truthfully Let go … really!
Understand that forgiveness is a command, not a suggestion. How to “Let Go” Understand that forgiveness is a command, not a suggestion.
Stop the mental churning How to “Let Go” Stop the mental churning [Love] does not act unbecomingly; it does not seek its own, is not provoked, does not take into account a wrong suffered, - I Corinthians 13:5
but one thing I do: forgetting what lies behind and reaching forward to what lies ahead, I press on toward the goal for the prize of the upward call of God in Christ Jesus. - Philippians 3:13b-14
The Mechanics of Forgiveness Define the offense clearly and truthfully Let go … really! Cancel the debt
10,000 Talents = $7 Billion
Forgiveness requires cancelling the debt (apology, justice, compensation) we are owed.
The healing doesn’t start until the debt is paid.
Review – Forgiveness requires: Articulation of the offense Letting go Cancelling of the debt
Is your debt to God paid off?