Say Something! Do Something! Standing Up to Bullying Behavior Tuesday, January 10 ~ 9:30 – 10:30 Presented by Kevin King, Principal and Tammy Cook, School Counselor Research information provided by Trudy Ludwig and Stan Davis

What is Bullying? Bullying behavior that is repeated, hurtful and intentional. Bullying behavior is a choice. Bullying behavior is learned and can be unlearned but it requires adult intervention. If it happens 1 time it is mean and rude If it happens more than once it is bullying behavior.

Types of Bullying Physical Verbal Relational Taunts Teases Forming an exclusive club Giving the silent treatment Rumors or gossip to hurt someone’s reputation Sending hurtful text messages or emails Posting hurtful and personal information online Pretending to be friends to get something

Change Our Way of Thinking Adults encourage bullying if they believe: Bullying is part of growing up Children who bully will grow out of it Children should resolve their own conflicts without adult support There is no time for this touchy-feely stuff in school We need to focus more on achievement tests Kids just need to toughen up This is an issue that should be dealt with at home

Interventions That Do Not Work Blaming the target “Don’t let it bother you.” “You’re too sensitive, just toughen up.” Giving Ineffective Advice “Just ignore it and it will stop.” “Tell her how you feel when she bullies you.” “If you’re not bleeding or throwing up, you’ll be fine.” “If he hits you, hit him back.” “Do it back to him so he knows how it feels.” Programs that are imposed on staff or require too many rules or too much time to implement.

Interventions That Do Work Clearly defined, concrete school-wide behavior expectations Predictable & escalating consequences for bullying behavior Positive emotional tone between adults & youth Acknowledge positive actions Provide aggressors with opportunities to restore situation Empower bystanders to make a positive difference Protect targets and bystanders from further retaliation by aggressors Help empower targets and bystanders Educating all students and adults about bullying behavior Building empathy and respect for others Creating safe spaces for kids to hang out Building community in the classroom and on the playground Create a youth advisory board – meet regularly to fully understand their perspective

What is Happening at NES to Prevent Bullying Clearly defined, concrete school-wide behavior expectations Positive School-wide Behavioral Support System Predictable & escalating consequences for bullying behavior Restorative Agreements and Behavior Notices Positive emotional tone between adults & youth Building empathy and respect for others Building community in the classroom and on the playground Restorative Practices, Responsive Classrooms, Robert Marzano Presentations, Caring School Communities Cross-age Buddies, Character Themes Acknowledge positive actions Knights Honors Provide aggressors with opportunities to restore situation Restorative Practices Empower targets and bystanders to make a positive difference Educating all students and adults about bullying behavior Principal Stories Assemblies Looking Ahead Protect targets and bystanders from further retaliation by aggressors Creating safe spaces for kids to hang out Create a youth advisory board – meet regularly to fully understand their perspective

A Closer Look at Restorative Practices at NES Restorative Practices -Language/Questions/Circles What Happened? Who was affected? How? What would you like to see happen to make things right? What do you need to do to make things right? PLAN OF ACTION

Developmental Guidance in Classrooms (Booklist Available) Kindergarten/1st Grade – Friendship, Listening, Tattling, etc. 2nd and 3rd Grade – Acceptance, Empathy, Friendship 4th Grade – Bullying, Teasing, Gossip/Rumors 5th Grade – Exclusion, Gossip/Rumors, Problem Solving 6th Grade – Rumors, Cyberbullying, Positive Thinking Developmental Groups – All Students (Information on webpage) Kindergarten - Small groups - Focus on friendship/self-control 1st Grade – Making and Keeping Friends 2nd Grade – Journey Through Friendship 3rd Grade – 7 Habits 4th – 5th Grade – Friendship Problem-Solving 6th Grade – Teen Talk – 7 Habits

Cross-grade Buddies Principal Stories Assemblies Classroom activities Have You Filled a Bucket Today? Crayon Box That Talked One Say Something Assemblies The Power of One Knights Out Assemblies

How Can I Help My Child? Tools to Teach Your Children Say, “Stop” (only if child feels safe) Ask, “Why? Why? Why?” Say, “Go Away” Say, “So,” “Whatever,” “Who Cares” (keep a neutral tone) Change the subject Act silly or goofy (use humor in a harmless way) Turn an insult into a compliment (only if child feels safe) Agree (only if child feels safe) Report bullying to a trusted grown-up COUNSELING WEBPAGE What can I do? How do I help?