Capturing the Hearts of Boys & Girls What difference does gender make and how does it impact ministry.

How would you describe boys?

How would you describe girls?

To capture the hearts of Boys and Girls we must understand their God-given uniqueness. @MarkEntzminger

What is “Gender-Specific?” 1. Gender-Specific is a MIND-SET. 2. Gender-Specific is an ENVIRONMENT.

Five Reasons for a Gender-Specific Approach

1. Unique Concerns for Boys and Girls

Unique Concerns for Boys Suicide rates in boys are about 3.5 times higher than in girls Adolescent boys are more likely to be victims of almost all types of serious violent crimes Boys are suffering in school Boys who don’t do well in school will struggle in life

Unique Concerns for Girls Depression 40% of date rape victims are between 14 and 17 years old Eating disorders Sexual issues

2. Diminished Role Models

Diminished Role Models Girls: In the absence of girls ministry, girls have less female role models within the church because there are more male pastors than female pastors. Boys: Have less role models both at home and in school, fewer male school teachers (1981 = 18%, today = 9%), and a majority of volunteer teachers in the local church are women.

3. Boys and Girls Learn Differently

BOYS Learning Attributes B - Becoming Competent O - Order Y - Yelling and Running S - Stretching Beyond

GIRLS Learning Attributes G - Greater Sensory Intake I - Inductive Thinking R - Real Life Application L - Love and Acceptance S - Speaking

4. Separate Topics and Approach to Mentoring

Separate Topics Girls use restrooms as social lounges. Boys in a restroom will never speak a word to each other. Separate Topics for Girls generally center around self-value, self-image, and interpersonal relationships Separate Topics for Boys generally center around issues related to authority and maturing into a godly man Unknown

Topics for Boys and Girls Self Worth In Christ Body Image Social Maturity Loving Future Husband Loving Future Children Showing respect for authority Purity Becoming a Homemaker Earning respect when in authority Risk-Taking Developing Leadership Model heroic behaviors, ideas, and stories featuring godly manhood Avoiding bossiness and manipulation Knowing How to Disagree with Someone Conflict Resolution and Communication Training Expressing and Receiving Encouragement Manage emotions so they are stronger and less directed by emotions Developing Empathy–may be most effective in leading boys away from violence and toward an understanding of what it means to be a godly man. Emotional Health within relationships – bullying, relational aggression, high need for control, submitting to authority

5. Classroom Management Benefits

Classroom Management Benefits Reduced Distractions Open Discussion Stronger Mentoring Relationships Camaraderie Built Response Time Equalized

Five Reasons for a Gender-Specific Approach Unique Concerns for Boys and Girls Diminished Role Models Boys and Girls Learn Differently Separate Topics and Approach to Mentoring Classroom Management Benefits

Six Components of Effective Gender-Specific Ministry

1. Discipleship and Leadership Training for Leaders

1. Discipleship and Leadership Training for Leaders 90% spiritual growth of the leader and training in cultural issues of the child. 10% focused on how to run the program. Training topics include role modeling, accountability, bonding, and the discipleship pathway People as early as high school should understand they importance of discipleship of the next generation.

2. Small Groups

2. Small Groups A mentor relationship can only be formed in small groups. Small groups facilitate unique environments. Boys need an active environment Girls need plenty of conversation Some aspects of discipleship can only occur in small groups: Answering and asking questions, accountability, feeling of belonging.

3. Current and Relevant

3. Current and Relevant Postmoderns are image driven Girls highly value relationships and the opportunity to communicate so simply being together meets girls’ needs Boys care about what is being taught. Relevance of content is very important in boys ministry Awareness of current issues and how to provide godly counsel Utilize updated methodologies and technology

4. Events

4. Events Create Momentum Build Teams Contribute to Church Growth

5. Numerous Stakeholders

5. Numerous Stakeholders Desired Stakeholders Lead Pastor/Pastor’s Wife Kids Pastor and Youth Pastor Men’s/Women’s Pastors Parents

6. Holistic

6. Holistic Kids Grow: Spiritually Relationally Intellectually Emotionally Physically

Characteristics of Effective Curriculums Both Girls Boys Support Church Culture Encouragement Rite of Passage Experiences Strong Communication with Stakeholders Role-Modeling Focus on Movement and Space User Friendly Communication Oriented Use of Humor Allows for Self-Direction Variety in Teaching Modes Competition Opportunities Vertical and Horizontal Mentorship Technology Experiential and Minimal Verbal Directions Postmodern Values Model heroic behaviors, and godly manhood Developed by practitioners, discipleship experts, and educators Leaders Carry Powerful Authority

Take the Next Steps Speak to the Future Train Leaders To capture the hearts of boys and girls we must understand their God-given uniqueness. Speak to the Future Train Leaders Recruit Gender Role Models Encourage Longevity Resource Appropriately @MarkEntzminger