Breaking the Silence in Sport Understanding Trauma + Handling Disclosure Workshop Cara Cash CEO Nexus NI

We will cover Who are Nexus What is Trauma How trauma is presented by our clients Examples of trauma How to support people that experience trauma How to handle a disclosure of sexual violence Questions

Who are Nexus NI? What do we know? Whats missing? How can we work together?

How do people view sexual violence?

What is trauma? In general, trauma can be defined as a psychological, emotional response to an event or an experience that is deeply distressing or disturbing, such as sexual violence. In 2016/17 Nexus offer 17,000 counselling sessions to victims of sexual violence – all dealing with trauma.

View of trauma? Because trauma is viewed individually, this broad trauma definition is more of a guideline. Everyone's experience of a traumatic event is different because we all see them through the eyes of previous experiences in our lives. Everyone is an individual + events will impact them individually as well trauma. One person could jump out of a aeroplane and enjoy every second, another person would say that it was the worst experience of their life and have NIght .

Client Traumatic experiences Individuals Note, all of the clients below have experienced some form of sexual violence. Trauma leads them to ask these sorts of questions; “Why does my daddy hate me, am I a bad girl?” Client, 12 year old. “I can’t hold on to this pain anymore.” Client, 69 year old female. “I thought I was a man, but not anymore.” Client, 26 year old male. Present their traumas.

How can we support traumatised people? The person may or may not want to talk about their experience or feelings. This is OK; it’s important not to force people to confront the event or their reactions before they are ready. If they do want to talk, the following tips may be helpful. empowerment of the person is so important because this was taken away from them during the abuse.

Supporting people with Trauma What to do…. Believe them Promote wellbeing Encourage them to do enjoyable things Acknowledge their achievements Encourage professional help Reassure them Listening is very important

Why might someone make a disclosure to you? They might not be able to cope They want it (abuse/trauma) to stop Sexual violence is getting worse They are ready to seek justice They’re trying to protect others They are having flashbacks Overcome by depression Experiencing self-harm or suicidal thoughts They trust you They feel safe talking to you They want help They want someone to listen

If someone discloses to you Top Tips Reinforce the survivor is not to blame, be patient if they are not ready to accept this. Allow the survivor their own feelings, anger, sadness or “non-emotion”, keep your feelings out of it. Make a joint plan as to what should happen next, e.g. referrals, support, diary keeping, reporting. Always explain the what, why and when of any actions. Above all, show compassion and respect – include the survivor and their wishes

Disclosure Influencing Factors Remember There is no perfect way to disclose We do not have to be experts in dealing with disclosure Clients could minimise/justify the abuse Client may give a lot/very little of information about the abuse Behaviour/attitude may be impacted by level of abuse/current risk etc. Abuse could be short/long term Could be non-recent or recent

Disclosure + You Listen carefully to the person. Do not express your own views on the matter. A reaction of shock or disbelief could cause the them to stop talking Let them know they've done the right thing. Reassurance can make a big impact to the victim who may have been keeping the abuse secret Tell them it's not their fault. Abuse is never the victim’s fault and they need to know this Say you believe them. A person could keep abuse secret in fear they won't be believed. They've told you because they want help and trust you'll be the person to believe them and help them

Disclosure + You Don't talk to the alleged abuser. Confronting the alleged abuser about what you’ve been told could make the situation a lot worse for the victim Explain what you'll do next. If appropriate, explain to the victim if you need to report the abuse to someone who will be able to help Don't delay reporting the abuse. The sooner the abuse is reported after the disclosure the better. Report as soon as possible so details are fresh in your mind and action can be taken quickly.

What barriers to disclosure are there? Having no-one to talk to Not having the words Not understanding they were abused Shame and being blamed for what has happened Lack of trust Love and attachment (to the offender) Afraid of offender Fear of telling – what will the impact be Not being believed Splitting the family up Fear of police and courts We cannot and should not ever force disclosure!

? Autonomy Vs Safety Making sure informed consent is agreed before person engages in your services! This statement is true, BUT if the client or others are at risk or a crime has, or going to be committed we do not require consent. We must report it

Legal Governance Duty of care to report disclosure Mandatory reporting of all criminal activity in Northern Ireland Child (NI) order 1995 Protection of children & vulnerable adults (NI) order 2003 Criminal Law Act NI 1967 (section 5) Internal policies and procedures may also apply

What happens when we get it wrong? Victim can be silent for years Can feel worthless/useless May lose trust in you/others May continue to be traumatised/victimised May reinforce messages from perpetrator In a study of disclosures of childhood abuse, if 1st disclosure was handled badly, it took a further 7 years to attempt any future disclose  

What happens when we get it right? Survivors feels they were believed Action was taken to protect them, if appropriate Emotional support was provided Survivor felt listened to

New Tools – Consent is Tea

Thank you Any Questions?