Sexual Risk Avoidance 2018 -19 8th Grade Patricia Hiner, RN Kaitlin Patterson

Video – Episodes 1 & 2 Vocabulary: Abstinence – the deliberate and voluntary act to refrain from a particular thing – in this lesson sexual activity and alcohol use Self-Control – the ability to control your own behavior, especially in terms of reactions and impulses Respect – holding in high esteem or honor Responsible – the trust a person assumes for doing what is asked of them Accountable - being answerable to a superior authority for one’s words and actions Secondary Virgin – deciding to stop sexual activity until marriage after once being sexually involved

ADVANTAGES & EXPECTATIONS DAY 1 Videos 1 & 2

ADVANTAGES Discussion

Who are the characters? Tell me about them… Jamal Luke Tiana Whitney Jamal – Lives with Mom, Dad in jail, has Uncle Frank around, has personal boundaries, makes good choices. Luke – Lives with Mom, no dad around, “womanizer”, “ladies man”, player, likes to party and get drunk. Tiana – Lives with parents, parents are annoying, tell her how to dress, who to hang with. Concerned about her image and being liked by everyone. Want to take her relationship with Jamal to “the next level.” Whitney – Lives with parents, new to school, parents are adopting a baby, gets along well with her parents, not interested in dating. Writes skits.

What happened in the first video? Feel – Act – Think vs Feel – Think – Act Bowling alley – Lifestyle or SPICE wheel Whitney and Luke in the car after bowling Skit – Mrs. Consequence Is Luke self – centered? Jamal and Tiana outside Tiana’s house Tiana invites Jamal in to be alone and more “physical” to take their relationship “to the next level.” Jamal has personal boundaries. Respect. Doesn’t want to hurt her. Jamal has to be home. He respects his mother’s boundaries for him and he is accountable to his mother Is Jamal excited about his relationship with Tiana? He is disappointed because he really likes Tiana and is concerned that she will get herself in trouble. Tiana in her bedroom watching Dr. Krusto on T.V. Dr. Krusto talking about consequences of sexual activity outside of marriage (STD, pregnancy). Dr. Krusto talking about dealing with emotions in three steps: feel an emotion, act on it, then think about consequences vs feel an emotion, think about consequences, then act on it

Review Lifestyle Wheel Spiritual – the unseen qualities that make you who you are including what you think, what you like, your sense of humor, and your relationship with other human persons; getting to know yourself and why you choose to do good or bad (values). Physical – Our unique physical appearance. Our bodies are necessary for communicating our thoughts and emotions, not only by speaking, but through our body language. It is important to take good care of our bodies by eating well with good nutrition, exercising, practicing good hygiene, and getting enough sleep. Intellectual – Our ability to think and reason and make choices. We learn every where, at home, at school, with our friends, with our family, and from the media. A smart person learns from their mistakes and chooses not to repeat the mistakes. A wise person learns from others’ mistakes and makes wise choices. Creative – Two aspects talents and interests – figure out what your good at, what you like, so you can become successful and happy in life. ability to create another person – now is the time to protect your reproductive health so you do not have to deal with consequences of decisions made as a teen. Drinking, drugs, alcohol, sexual activity can damage your reproductive organs. Emotional – emotions are neither good or bad; they are signals that something is different (internally or exterior to ourselves). We cannot control how we feel, but we can control how we react to our emotions. Typically we feel and emotion, act on it, then think of the consequences. It takes practice to feel an emotion, think about it, then act.

How can you politely say “No”? A friend wants you to go to a party where you both know there will be beer and alcohol… A boy wants a girl to take a drink of his beer/liquor…. A friend wants you to try sniffing a substance to get “high”… A girl wants a boy to take her to a party where he knows there will be drugs and alcohol……

What is sexual self-control? Jamal was practicing self-control when he said “no” to Tiana. Jamal was practicing self-control when he said “no” to Tiana. Sexual self-control is an internal strength to avoid circumstances where a heightened sexual urge is stimulated, especially watching something sexually stimulating or getting in to prolonged kissing situations. The first step in practicing sexual self-control is to strengthen your intentions and avoid situations where you become sexually stimulated.

FEEL – ACT – THINK VS FEEL – THINK – ACT Someone is annoying you, on purpose. What do you do? You feel the emotion anger What happens next? You acted out. Then what happened? You had time to think when you were punished for acting out. Do you see how feel-think-act gets you into trouble.

FEEL – ACT – THINK VS FEEL – THINK – ACT What if you feel anger, stop to think, and then act? How would the outcome be different? Examples Vocabulary: Person – a unique being with the ability to think and chose and express who they are through a body. Choices – selecting to do or say one thing over another. Consequences – this is what happens after a choice is made.

Expectations Discussion

What happened in the second video? Luke Jamal Tiana Whitney Vocabulary – Abstinence – the deliberate and voluntary act of refrain from a particular thing (sexual activity, illegal drugs, alcohol, tobacco). Standards (yardstick philosophy) – An established rule. Boundaries – a limit set on actions Classroom scene – Luke tells how he doesn’t have a father in his life; Jamal describes how his Uncle Frank talks with him about the yardstick philosophy which refers to moral standards. Whitney expresses support for Jamal’s standard to avoid getting involved in a sexual relationship. Tiana calls Jamal to get herself invited to the skit practice. Whitney thinks that it’s a good idea for her to come. Yardstick examples – When a house is built, the worker in the lumber yard understands the standard of measurement used to cut lumber. We know there are laws or standards about stealing, damaging property of others, drunk driving, assault and murder. Moral standards do not change just as the distance from one point to another doesn’t change just because you don’t like it. Skit with Mrs. Consequence – Mrs. Consequence uses syrup as a sign of all the risks a teen takes when they get involved in sexual activity – STD, pregnancy, high school dropout, and likelihood of teen mothers remaining single for the rest of their lives; or being involved in other high risk behaviors, e.g., drinking alcohol, using drugs or smoking. The syrup may taste good on pancakes, but is a sticky mess when you have it on your hands. Sex before marriage is like syrup on your hands, “that’s not right!” Sex when married is like syrup on pancakes, “the way it’s supposed to be.” Feel – Think – Act Mrs. Consequence said there are 900,000 teen pregnancies every year and 3 million STDs annually reported among teens.

What happened in the second video? Jamal and Luke outside school – How are Luke and Jamal different in this area? Jamal and Tiana phone argument and break up – Do you think that Jamal and Tiana were reasonable in their discussions, did they show self-control? Jamal and Luke outside school – Luke’s idea of fun involves partying, alcohol, drugs, and girls. Jamal doesn’t need alcohol and drugs to have fun. He understands the benefits of having boundaries and like knowing what is expected of him. How are Luke and Jamal different in this area? Jamal and Tiana phone argument and break up – Jamal respects Tiana and doesn’t think having sex with her is the right thing to do, “Maybe when we’re thinking the same way, we can get back together.” Do you think that Jamal and Tiana were reasonable in their discussions, did they show self-control? Tiana tries to make Jamal feel guilty by expressing her belief that he doesn’t “love” her, and if he really loved her he would want to be physically intimate.

What happened in the second video? Tiana and Whitney in new baby’s room – What is the best way to avoid consequences of sexual activity? Is it OK for Tiana to date Luke after the break up with Jamal? What about Whitney and Jamal dating? Tiana is probably thinking that Jamal and Whitney may have talked about her pushing Jamal for sex. The two girls talk about Whitney’s parents adopting the baby of a 15 year old girl and why teens need boundaries. To make the decision to avoid sexual activity is the only sure way to avoid the consequences of teen pregnancy, STDs, and emotional heart break.

Why would a person need to be abstinent? In order to grow in self-control Eliminate the worry about: STDs Pregnancy Social and economic consequences of treating sex as a recreational activity Emotional impact on you life Leading to participation in other high risk activities like drinking alcohol, using drugs, and pornography. Even in non-traditional relationships, abstinence is the only 100% fail safe standard for absolute spiritual, physical, and emotional health.

Changes in Teen Birth Rate Among Girls Age 15 – 17, 1991 – 2016 (percent) U.S. -77% Tennessee -63%

Boundaries Freedom FREEDOM Boundaries What happens to my personal freedoms as my personal boundaries increase? * This is the activity (I would not use the duct tape example in the book) Personal boundaries: Don’t use drugs, don’t drink alcohol and drive, don’t text and drive, wear my seat belt, go to church, exercise, etc. Freedoms: choose a career, my education, where I work, how I spend free time, where I go on vacation, etc. Boundaries that can be broken: drinking alcohol and driving, not wearing a seat belt, etc. What happens to my personal freedoms as my personal boundaries increase? If I drink alcohol and drive, I may be involved in a car accident that can hurt me or others. I may get a DUI or a criminal charge that would severely decrease my freedom if I go to jail, get placed on probation, or lose my driver’s license.