CHOPPY SENTENCES

WHY IS CALLED CHOPPY SENTENCE? Many short sentences in succession make it appear that a writer is incapable of sustaining a complex thought. Rather than small, choppy sentences, construct ones that have some weight and depth. That doesn't always mean length, but formal academic writing tends to avoid, for instance, more than three sentences in a row with fewer than ten words in them.

COMPARE THESE SENTENCES! Small sentences are boring to read. Many of them strung together look bad. They appear simple. Your thoughts look simple, too. It's like you can't sustain an idea for more than a few words. You can think in only trivial, simplistic ways. Small thoughts seem to come from small minds. You will leave your reader with the impression of simplemindedness. Is that what you want? Small sentences are boring to read and, in fact, many of them strung together look bad because they appear simple. If your thoughts look simple, it will seem like you can't sustain an idea for more than a few words and can think in only trivial, simplistic ways. Since small thoughts seem to come from small minds, you will leave your reader with the impression of simplemindedness. Is that what you want?

HOW TO COMBINE CHOPPY SENTENCE By combining related sentences with a comma and a coordinating conjunction By adding introductory phrases and/or clauses.

TURNING INTO COMPOUND SENTENCES (ADDING A COMMA AND COORDINATING CONJUNCTION) FANBOYS is an acronym made up of the first letters of the common conjunctions: For, And, Nor, But, Or, Yet, So. If you wanted to combine two sentences and show a cause and effect relationship, one way you could do it would be to use a coordinating conjunction. These are the connecting words for, and, nor, but, or, yet, and so. One way to remember all of them is to call them "FANBOYS." In most cases, they will be preceded by a comma. Example Little Ann crossed the river. Old Dan stood bawling on the bank. Little Ann crossed the river, and Old Dan stood bawling on the bank.

EXAMPLE I noticed that the road stated at the edge of the foothills. It was always in sight of the river. I noticed that the road stated at the edge of the foothills, but it was always in sight of the river.

TURNING INTO COMPLEX SENTENCES Old Dan was afraid. He stood on the bank and bawled. Because Old Dan was afraid, he stood on the bank and bawled.

ADDING AN INTRODUCTORY CLAUSE Choppy - Grandpa fed and watered the team. Papa and I carried our bedding to the shelter. Corrected - While Grandpa fed and watered the team, Papa and I carried our bedding to the shelter.

PRACTICE 1. Choose the sentence that correctly combines the following sentences. The vocal cords refused to work. I could snap my fingers. The vocal cords refused to work yet I could snap my fingers. Because the vocal cords refused to work I could snap my fingers. The vocal cords refused to work, but I could snap my fingers. As the vocal cords refused to work, I could snap my fingers.

2. Which of the following is written correctly? Crawling under the buggy, I lay down between my dogs. Crawling under the buggy. I lay down between my dogs. Crawling under the buggy, I lie down between my dogs. Crawling under the buggy. I lie down between my dogs.

3. How can the error in the following sentence be fixed 3. How can the error in the following sentence be fixed? Graceful as any queen. My little dog walked down the table. Graceful as any queen, and my little dog walked down the table. As graceful as any queen, my little dog walked down the table. Graceful as any queen, but my little dog walked down the table. She was graceful as any queen, my little dog walked down the table.

4. Choose the answer that correctly combines the following sentences 4. Choose the answer that correctly combines the following sentences. It came my time to draw. My hand was shaking so hard I could hardly get it in the box. When it came my time to draw. My hand was shaking so hard. I could hardly get it in the box. When it came my time to draw, my hand was shaking so hard. I could hardly get it in the box. It came my time to draw, because my hand was shaking so hard. I could hardly get it in the box. It came my time to draw, for my hand was shaking so hard. I could hardly get it in the box.

ANSWERS C B