End of year assessment feedback: Reading Section 26th June 2017 End of year assessment feedback: Reading Section Learning objective: To learn from and improve our end of year assessment through MRI. To apply the success criteria to improve your answers. Do Now On your desks you will have your end of year assessment with the feedback sheet attached. While the register is being taken, spend some time reading through the comments.

Questions – follow a set format Identify 4 things ( 4 marks) - find a quote / watch out for ‘word’ or ‘phrase’ (5 minutes) How does the writer use language to … ?(8 marks) (15 minutes) (iii) How has the writer structured the text to…? (8 marks) (15 minutes) (iv) To what extent do you agree? (20 marks)(25 minutes) Learning objective: To learn from and improve our end of year assessment through MRI.

Read again the first part of the source, lines 1 to 4: List four things from this point of the text that you learn about the sweet shop. Learning objective: To learn from and improve our end of year assessment through MRI.

Possible answers The sweetshop was in Llandaff The sweet shop was the centre of the boys’ lives The boys visited the sweetshop in 1923 The boys thought there would be nothing to live for without the sweetshop. The woman who owned the sweetshop was a horror. The boys hated the woman who owned the sweetshop. Success criteria: Answers must relate to the shop not Mrs. Pratchett. You must have taken your information from lines 1-4 You cannot copy large sections of the text as it does not prove that you have carefully selected information. You need 4 ideas. Learning objective: To learn from and improve our end of year assessment through MRI.

For language – explain the precise effect of specific words or phrases. You must quote. Be selective: pick out the most relevant words or phrases to analyse. Do not repeat the words from the quotation. Do not just explain what it means. Explain why the writer has chosen that particular word / phrase. Look for techniques and use terminology if confident, but not at the expense of explaining effect.

How does the writer use language to describe Mrs. Pratchett? 5 -14 Her name was Mrs. Pratchett. She was a small skinny old hag with a moustache on her upper lip and a mouth as sour as a green gooseberry. She never smiled. She never welcomed us when we went in, and the only times she spoke were when she said things like, ‘I’m watchin’ you so keep yer thievin’ fingers off them chocolates!’ Or ‘I don’t want you in ‘ere just to look around! Either you forks out or you gets out’. But by far the most loathsome thing about Mrs. Pratchett was the filth that clung around her. Her apron was grey and greasy. Her blouse had bits of breakfast all over it, toast crumbs and tea stains and plotches of dired egg yolk. It was her hands, however, that disturbed us the most. They were disgusting. They were black with dirt and grime. They looked as though they had been putting lumps of coal on the fire all day long. How does the writer use language to describe Mrs. Pratchett? You could include the writer’s choice of: Words and phrases Language features and techniques Sentence forms

Question 2- AO2 Using the success criteria for question two, look at your own answer and MRI your own work. Don’t forget to use the success criteria. Success criteria: Use subject specific terminology like adjectives, metaphors. Use quotes from the correct section of the text. Explain the effect of language. Consider the writer’s intentions. Make perceptive comments and read between the lines. Explain the effect on the reader. EXTENSION: If you have finished, please ask for the extension. Learning objective: To learn from and improve our end of year assessment through MRI.

Sentence Starters S - In the extract, one of the ways that the writer ....... is through the use of.....(device/ word class/ sentence form). Qu - An example of this is... A - Here, the writer's choice of language creates... D - One of the key words is.... - This creates an effect of....... on the reader because..... - Although some readers might suggest that this..........other readers may.......

Question 3- Comment on effect of structure For structure: Start, middle and end. Contrasts and parallels (differences and similarities) Developments / changes / builds Sentence types / structures – but be specific – type of sentence and precise effect of it used in the text at this point. Punctuation and effect (use of commas and impact on pace – linked to theme of extract).

Structure: These all count… Start How the text starts / the introduction. Middle What happens in the middle of the text? How has it developed? End (Conclusion) How does it end / conclude? Sentence Different type of sentences. Also look at how a sentence starts and ends. Punctuation What punctuation is used and why? Paragraph How is the text divided? What is the content of the paragraphs? How are individual paragraphs organised? Contrast Does the writer compare something?– could be appearance, feelings etc Chronological order Does the writer describe things in the order they happened? Repetition Does the writer repeat words / phrases or ideas? Why? Topic sentence A sentence which introduces a paragraph. It tells us what will be written about in the paragraph. Parenthesis Additional information in paired punctuation – embedded clause Statement Basic sentence, often used to sound factual Preposition phrase Prepositions are words like up, on, over. Spatial organisation descriptive writing which uses lots of preposition phrases at the start of sentences

Structure : Possible effects? Short sentences - punchy dramatic or abrupt facts – where are they placed – effect at end or beginning of paragraphs Fragments - an incomplete sentence. Sometimes this gives the effect of confusion, ragged thoughts. The incompleteness of the utterance or phrase can create mystery. Creation of mystery by giving incomplete information. Writers often give characters' reactions, before letting the reader know what happened, i.e. emotions, mood or reactions first, then facts. The use of the first person, as a reader we feel very close to the action, as if we're experiencing it too. Writers may include characters' thoughts. The present tense can create a sense of immediacy and of the reader being immersed in the action.

Question 3- AO2 Using the success criteria for question three, look at your own answer and MRI your own work. Don’t forget to use the success criteria. Success criteria: Use subject specific terminology like adjectives, metaphors. Use quotes from the correct section of the text. Explain the effect of the structure i.e. what does it suggest? Consider the writer’s intentions. Make perceptive comments and read between the lines. Explain the effect on the reader. Make sure you stay focused on structure. EXTENSION: If you have finished, please ask for the extension. Learning objective: To learn from and improve our end of year assessment through MRI.

Paper 1 Question 3 sentence starters – Structure Analysis In the opening of the extract, the writer immediately focuses the reader's attention on.... This is significant because the writer may be establishing.... As the extract is from the_____part of the text, (find this info at the top of the extract), it is likely that this is important because.... As the extract develops, writer changes the focus from_______to_______. The writer (gradually/suddenly) shifts the reader's focus to... This may be because...  Towards the end of the extract, the writer focuses our attention on... This may be important because The reader's experience goes from______(start), to _____(middle), to _______end. This is in order to____________

Focus this part of your answer on the second half of the Source , from line 26 to the end. Roald Dahl once said: ‘Every writer in the world has to use characters that have something interesting about them’. To what extent do you agree that the characters in the extract have something interesting about them? In your response you could: Write about your own impressions of the characters Evaluate how the writer has created these impressions Support your opinions with quotations from the text.

Question 4- AO4 Using the success criteria for question four, look at your own answer and MRI your own work. Don’t forget to use the success criteria. Success criteria: Use subject specific terminology like adjectives, metaphors. Back up your points with quotes from the text. Explain the effect of the structure i.e. what does it suggest? Consider the writer’s intentions. Make perceptive comments and read between the lines. Explain the effect on the reader. Evaluate whether the student is right in their statement and whether the writer is successful in achieving their intention. EXTENSION: If you have finished, please ask for the extension. Learning objective: To learn from and improve our end of year assessment through MRI.

Question 4 Sentence Starters Personally, I agree with the statement because........ One of the methods used by the writer is........... This enables me to agree with the statement because it shows......... This method is also successful in making me agree with that idea that.......because it...... Furthermore, it also makes me agree because......... The writer's choice of the word...... also leads me to agree because it suggests...... From this, we also understand........ which is one of the reasons I agree with the statement Another reason that I agree is because..... Another method the writer uses is........ However, some people may disagree because..... In the extract, one of the methods used by the writer suggests that...........and this is why I do, to some extent, disagree. For example, the writer writes........ This method causes me to disagree because....... The writer's choice of the word..........is also significant in why I disagree because......