Welcome! March 13th, 2018 Tuesday Do Now Find your seats! If you don’t remember where you sit, ask me. Write the date at the top of a new page in your journal. Once the bell rings, begin the freewrite. Prompt: Write a scene that includes the following dialogue: “That’s the stupidest thing you’ve ever said. Ever.”

Writing Prose: Showing vs Telling We’re going to spend today talking again about showing vs telling – not only what it means, but specific techniques that allow us to show in our own writing. As a recap, telling your reader your story is cataloging actions and emotions, while showing creates images in the reader’s imagination. It’s the difference between the laundry list and the laundry. Let me show you an example…

Writing Prose: Showing vs Telling Bob felt scared. This sentence isn’t ambiguous, but it’s not very evocative. Bob may feel fear, but the reader isn’t likely to. Bob’s face went ashen. His breathing came in ragged gasps. True, the second example is a good deal longer than the first — ten words as compared to a bare three — but you get a lot more bang for your narrative buck. Like the first, the second example makes it pretty clear that Bob is scared, but unlike the first, it creates a distinct picture in the reader’s mind. As an added bonus, it also gives us a bit of insight into how frightened Bob is, and how he handles his fear. It seems to me that this sort of insight is central to creating intricate, compelling characters — which many would say is the cornerstone of good fiction.

Showing vs Telling: Using Strong Verbs Additionally, when trying to create vivid prose, always remember: verbs should carry the weight of the description. If you want to make a sentence come to life, break out your thesaurus (or your phone) and dig around for the most vivid verbs you can find. Consider the sentence: Daniel walked down the street. It gives us the basics, but it’s bland. By contrast, the sentences below give us a sense of his mood: Daniel ambled down the street. Daniel strutted down the street. Daniel slunk down the street. Daniel shuffled down the street. See how much of a difference that makes?

Showing vs Telling: Supplying Details Showing can also be about getting rid of ambiguity – making sure that you’re communicating what you want to your reader. For example, if I wanted to write: The house looked old. My reader might know quite what I mean. Is it run down, or well-kept and just built a long time ago? This sentence gets rid of any questions the reader might have: The house slouched in a yard choked with weeds, its paint faded and flaking, the lace curtains in its windows yellowed with age.

Try it on your own! Now, give it a shot on your own. Choose three statements below, and show them to your reader. Remember to use vivid imagery, appeal to the senses, use strong verbs, and try to eliminate any ambiguous phrasing. (You should have at least four sentences for each statement you choose to show). She was sad when she lost her puppy. It was the best day of their lives. The garden was beautiful. It was a dark and stormy night. She loved him a lot. It was an exciting day.

Try it on your own! For the rest of class, we’re going to practice showing in flash fiction. The packet you picked up at the beginning of class has 15 mysterious classified ads from real newspapers. Your job is to either write the story behind one of the ads (who wrote it, and what lead to them writing it) or the story of the person who answered the ad (who responded and why, how it turned out). As you write, remember to show as much of your story as possible. Remember to use sensory imagery, avoid ambiguities, and use strong verbs wherever possible. You should write at least 15 sentences for this assignment. Good luck! 