Beyond Time-Out: Discipline Alternatives for Preschoolers

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Presentation transcript:

Beyond Time-Out: Discipline Alternatives for Preschoolers Melissa Johnson, Ph.D. WakeMed

Goals of discipline for preschoolers Ensure child’s safety and health Maintain a pleasant and orderly atmosphere and environment Teach child appropriate patterns of behavior Develop character/moral values Where are you in this hierarchy? Think about short and long-term goals.

Factors that impact preschoolers’ behavior Health and physical well-being (sleep, hunger, illness) Temperament (easy, difficult, slow-to- warm-up, spirited) Developmental level (social-emotional, cognitive, language, motor skills) Environmental structure and routines Family relationships and atmosphere Child’s need for attention, power, sympathy Discipline

Discipline pitfalls One approach to everything (time-out, spanking, rewards) Too many words Backing off / giving in Waiting until you explode Unclear rules and goals Inappropriate expectations Forgetting to have fun

Discipline that works is... Flexible- adapts to child and situation Logical- fits the misbehavior, child learns something Is under YOUR control

Thinking process... Do I need to discipline at all? (ignoring, prevention, distraction, meeting physical needs, reassurance, firmness/broken record) If yes… -many options!

Natural Consequences Allow the child to experience the natural consequences of his behavior

Using natural consequence Is it safe? Can you live with it? Do you have enough control over it? Will the child learn from it?

Logical Consequences Set up a consequence that is… logically related to the behavior under your control the child DOESN’T want to happen will teach the child something, if possible!

Time-Out One option among many logical consequences! To make it work: Don’t overuse Pick a boring place with clear boundaries Use a timer Work on Time-In relationship

Making “Time-In” Better Communication strategies Active listening Quiet listening Pick your time and place Floortime

An Ounce of Prevention Routines and structure Catch ’em being good “Star charts” and other planned rewards: celebrations vs. bribes

A few don’ts DON’T beat up on yourself DON’T expect perfection in either you or your child DON’T blame your spouse for their imperfections DON’T resolve to be perfect today DON’T forget to time yourself out if you are losing it DON’T try to do it all alone