Ordinary People: Themes By Judith Guest Source: enotes.com. Ordinary People Summary and Study Guide, enotes.com, Inc., n.d. Web. 3 Jan. 2010.

4 Main Themes Grief and sorrow Atonement and forgiveness Alienation and loneliness Identity

Grief and Sorrow Conflicts arise in the family as they turn inward to cope with the loss of Buck. Because Conrad feels responsible for Buck’s death, he cannot grieve in a healthy way. Beth can’t deal with her sorrow because she does not accept that their lives will never be the same again now that Buck is gone. Cal’s need for structure and organization in his life is destroyed by the tragedy, and he loses his grip on his identity and his relationship with his family.

Atonement and Forgiveness Con apologizes for the boating accident but not for his suicide attempt. His parents struggle to forgive him. Beth says she will never forgive Con for attempting suicide because it is his way of punishing her. Without the capacity to forgive, she is unable to reconcile her feelings for her surviving son.

Cal is very oversolicitous with Con and treats him as fragile. He cannot have a genuine relationship with Con until he acknowledges his anger at Con for attempting suicide and tearing the family apart.

Alienation and Loneliness Con is depressed, anxious, and barely able to speak to friends, family members or teachers. Cal feels alienated because he cannot have healthy social encounters and drinks too much to compensate. Beth, who is in the best position to help her husband, cannot listen to others’ feelings or express her own.

Ironically, Conrad seems to cope best as a result of his therapy with a psychiatrist and his relationship with a girlfriend. He actually makes real connections with other people and finally feels much less isolated than his parents are.

Identity After Buck’s death, Con and Cal recognize that they are living in the shadows of other people. They no longer have their own identity. Con’s therapist helps him understand that by repressing his feelings he is losing touch with his own identity and no longer really knows what kind of person he is.

Cal is also prevented from expressing his feelings and from connecting with his wife. When Buck died, their family roles shifted and vanished. Beth is unable to adapt to the changes in the family in the face of difficult circumstances.