Communication Why do we need to communicate? To survive Why is this hard? What you mean to say 2. What you actually say 3. What the other person hears 4. What the other person thinks they hear 5.What the other person says 6. What you think the other person said Why do we need to communicate? To survive For relationships What is communication? Process of conveying feelings, attitudes, acts, beliefs and ideas

communication process The Idea Encoding Transmission Receiving Decoding Understanding Feedback Noise External Internal

One Way Communication Two way communication Key element is feedback: helps communication, develop relationships and people to work together Or Passive listening because there is no verbal feedback Two way communication

Nonverbal Communication Can relate to the verbal message in 3 ways: It can reinforce the verbal message It can replace the verbal message It can contradict the verbal message

Nonverbal Communication Facial Expressions Vocal Qualities Gestures Touching Personal Space

More Nonverbal Communication Distances Intimate distance: 18” Personal Distance: 18” - 4’ Social Distance: 4’ – 12’ Public Distance: 12’ + Physical Environment Clothing Silence

Semantics Assumptions Emotional Phrases Verbal Communication You wouldn’t understand, After all I’ve done for you, You wouldn’t do that if you really cared about me, When I was your age…

Gender Males: status and independence Females: Connection and intimacy Communication: both genders could adapt some of the othes style

Listening Ignoring Pretending Selective Attentive Empathetic Listening Much more than hearing and seeing: an active process. Most often, 75% of communication is ignored, misunderstood or forgotten Ignoring Pretending Selective Attentive Empathetic Listening

Responding Judging Criticizing Behavior instead of personalities No “you” messages Observations instead of judgments Don’t do it when angry or upset Don’t give advice Advising Interpreting Supporting Questioning Understanding

Active Listening Posture Open ended questions: What, where, when, how, etc? Close ended questions: Answered with yes or no Minimal Encourages Reflective Responses

Celebrity Listening Activity Brad Pitt

Other Listening Activity

Questioning Activity Tell your group members: The best thing that happened to me in 2008 happened at the_____ (location). Ask 10 open ended questions to learn what happened. When, who were you with, what were you wearing, etc. [You cannot ask “What happened?] Then switch to, “The worst thing that happened to me in 2008 was at the____ . This time use 10 close ended questions to find out more. Yes / No questions Were you swimming at the time? Were you with your sibling? Were you with your boyfriend/girlfriend? Etc.

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