Positive Behavior Strategies Marcello Lopez Education Specialist, Early Childhood Chandler Learning Academy

Workshop Agenda Introduction (Ice breaker) Workshop Overview (Learning Objectives) Child Behavior Pretest

Workshop Agenda Understanding Children’s Behavior (Bx) What is NORMAL Bx for a child? Developmental milestones game Identifying Bx problems Why some children misbehave Understanding the goals of negative Bx

Workshop Agenda Bx Problems/Self-esteem Poker chips video Video feedback discussion

Workshop Agenda Effective Bx Management Principles of using Bx modification Using REWARDS to encourage good Bx IGNORING poor Bx GIVING DIRECTIONS to the child TIME OUT procedure

Workshop Agenda Positive Role-Modeling Conclusion and Evaluation “Do unto children as you’d have them do unto you” Conclusion and Evaluation Review workshop (closure activity) Child Bx quiz part II Workshop evaluation

Ice Breaker! Introductions

Workshop Overview Through your participation in this workshop, you will: Learn positive, proactive child management skills that you can use in your daily interactions. Develop approaches that build your child’s self-esteem by using positive reinforcement as a way to handle difficult Bx. Gain knowledge that will increase the quality of life for your child.

Behavior Quiz

Understanding Children’s Bx What is normal Bx for a child? Depends on child’s age, personality, physical/emotional development. Child’s Bx may be a problem if it doesn’t match expectations of the family/if it’s disruptive Knowing what to expect from a child at each age will help you decide what normal Bx is.

Piaget’s Stages of Development

Identifying Bx Problems Are Bx problems common? Bx is a complex interaction of a child’s biologic vulnerabilities, innate strengths, nurturing environment, and parenting style. Problem in any of these areas (mismatch) may lead to undesirable Bxs. Very strong-willed child w/parent unable to set limits

What Bxs might be a sign of future problems? Too aggressive at play Temper tantrums – severe, long, or not age appropriate Noncompliance with requests Intolerant of changes in routine Always moving

Why some children misbehave Children do not intentionally set out to misbehave, there is always a reason. Here are 2: Seeking attention Seeking power

Seeking Attention Every healthy child demands attention. An important goal of parents is to supply the attention that children need to develop a healthy self-esteem. If 90% of misbehavior is for attention, then denying attention for that negative Bx usually stops the misbehavior Many times, ignoring the negative Bx is not enough

Seeking Attention For children that require undue attention, the temptation for most parents is to scold, nag, or coax. Remember the child’s goal is to get your attention—ANY ATTENTION!—so scolding, nagging only reinforces negative Bx. If we only notice a child’s mistakes, the child will make mistakes for attention Give the child attention, increase it, “catch” them being “good” in order to increase “good” Bx

Seeking Power Some children believe they only count when they are running the show. Instead of joining the struggle, parents should take charge by acting instead of reasoning. Long discussions about why they need to do something only gives children unreasonable power over their parents.

Seeking Power During a power struggle Take kind, calm, but firm, action: keep talking to a minimum! Decide what you will do Give them limited choices Limited choices are perfect because it gives the child the sense of power and control they crave but with limits. Use “First, then” language Wait…

4 Goals of Negative Bx

Which parenting style are we aiming for?

Parenting Styles Authoritative High demands/expectations set for the child. Parent is responsive to child’s needs. Provides guidance when necessary, letting child be independent when necessary Permissive Parent is responsive, but does not have high expectations set for child. Parenting style usually leads to child having control over parent

Parenting Styles Authoritarian Parent places high demands on child, but not responsive enough to provide guidance. Can often lead to poor self-esteem in the child if they don not succeed; violent aggressive Bx later in life Neglectful Parent does not place high demands on the child and is not responsive towards child’s needs. Often leads to the child having very poor self-esteem and problems interacting in social environments

Self-esteem Rick Lavoie “When the Chips Are Down” https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Vsl_XiyJupg

Some humor…

Some humor…

Some humor…

Inspirational

Inspirational

64 Positive things to say http://creativewithkids.com/64-positive-things-to-say-to-kids/