Creating Our CommonWealth… in western Mass Reflections and Lessons

Three years ago… we didn’t really know what we were getting into

But we found our way CCW helped us articulate what was always in our hearts, and learn ways to communicate and embed those values in our work and personal lives

My Project

Key Components Concrete tools and strategies that families can use Helping families create a vision and the drive to make it happen Creating time for parents to help one another develop a vision and next steps Partnering with other parents with a different life experience Focus on the How more than the Why Begin with exercise to help people identify how people meet and the importance of friendships in their life. Watch video to remind people that it is possible for people with and without disabilities to be friends. Discuss research to underline the importance. If don’t complete worksheets at workshop, probably won’t get done. Brittany and need for broader diversity of presenters.

Reflections & Observations Parents fluctuate between inspired and exhausted – Need to recruit help from others The work is never done. Changes in residence, school often mean starting from scratch Current social/political climate is creating real fear Need voices of parents who represent diversity of culture and life experience Educating the general public and building bridges is exhausting for families – supporting professionals can do so much to help with this! Parents are exhausted, some too introverted. Need to identify gatekeepers and make the ask of other families, community organizations, school, etc Parents with children of color can be skeptical of finding people who share their values. Need to focus on safety that is created through relationships, identifying potential friends through value-based connections Every conversation was informed by the audience’s experiences Educating general public is something we can all do, bit by bit! You wouldn’t believe what people say to our families, even when well-intentioned

My Life

It Can’t be a One-Sided Conversation! Shared understanding and buy-in New litmus test for activities Setting goals At Home Game Club, band Carpooling Outreach to other parents In School Making the ask – camps, parents… Finding gatekeepers and facilitators Inviting others into our lives In Community As parents: how do we define friendship? What role does friendship play in our lives? What commitment are we willing to make for our son? How do we find the time and energy? Outcomes: spaghetti dinners, commitment for equal playdates whenever possible, local regularly occurring inclusive activities (less Family Support Center) With school: how to maximize social opportunities in small windows of time with typical peers? Creating new opportunities (game club), HS play, band. In community: making the ask – to camps (attending Nonotuck on Fridays), to other parents (Tom Doody). Gatekeepers/facilitators: PCAs, kids in carpool,

Where we are at Short (but growing) list of kids; still little reciprocation Working as a team More friendships between families Using existing supports more strategically Still exhausted at times

Next Steps Expand Reach of Supporting Friendships Train other families to present Create webinar Work with Family Support Centers Become bridge builders Make it a regular conversation

The Real Work