AS YOU COME IN March 20, 2018 Think about the student essay you read yesterday. What advice would you give the author to revise and improve her essay? Respond in your journals in 3-5 sentences. Be detailed and specific! Homework: Complete your Works Cited by Friday to be submitted with your rough draft. Use instructions on blog.

AND A LOT OF CONTRACTIONS AND 1ST/2ND PERSON!!! OUTLINE FEEDBACK What I’ve noticed so far: No _____________ _________ around article titles. Evidence does not clearly support ___________________ or comes from one article. Commentary is just restating the ____________________ or does not connect to reason/claim. It does not explain why it matters. Also, sometimes _____________________ is just more evidence. ___________________ is insufficient or does not mention the controversy/debate around the topic. Repetitive or confusing _________ - ins. Counter-argument ___________________ is structured incorrectly. Boring, snore-fest _____________________ and __________________. quotation marks reason AND A LOT OF CONTRACTIONS AND 1ST/2ND PERSON!!! evidence commentary Background lead paragraph hooks clinchers

ROUGH DRAFT Due Friday at the latest. Will be collected with your works cited for a 40% grade. Name Teacher’s Name(s)  Ms. Tansey (NOT Molly Tansey) ELA, _____ period 20 March 2018 Title Here is where your hook would be. Notice how the paragraph is indented. Every paragraph you write should be indented. Make sure you skip lines!!!