Better Relationships Better Parenting Programme Supporting families in conflict in Hertfordshire

Evidence shows that poor inter-parental relationships impact on child outcomes whether the parents are together or apart.

Poor inter-parental relationships: Consequences for child outcomes

Hertfordshire’s objectives: To support current and prospective parents to create and maintain good quality relationships in order to sustain a safe, stable and nurturing family environment for their children. Vulnerable groups and those with other disadvantages – breakdown more likely to occur for these groups, and negative effects more likely to be compounded. Life chances approach. Communicating the importance of healthy relationships and normalising help seeking behaviour – helping people to understand the effects on children and the importance of nurturing the couple relationship. Focus on early help Establishing a clear, credible, and widely endorsed evidence base linking child outcomes to relationship quality.

This programme contributes to the Children’s Services Outcomes Framework

Tools and resources have been produced to help practitioners support families with relationship issues

Practitioners toolkit Our online toolkit is available to practitioners to help with those early conversations with parents and signpost to local services Tools for how to support parents. Conflict spiral. How to understand conflict. How to set goals with parents. How to manage the conversation. Web resources. Training coming soon. www.hertfordshire.gov.uk/betterrelationships

A new relationships support page for parents www.hertfordshire.gov.uk/parentrelationships

A leaflet has been produced for parents as a tool for front line workers to use when having early conversations with parents about conflict

Specialist support for families Families in need of more intensive support and who have a Families First assessment in place (or planned) can be referred by their Families First practitioner to the following services: Couple Counselling For parents who: Want to learn how to deal with long term issues in their relationship e.g. affairs, differences in cultural/economic background, addiction, bereavement, health issues Want to communicate better and understand each other more Conflict Coaching For parents who: Want to learn how to engage in, manage, or productively resolve conflict. In this process, the conflict coach works one-on-one with the person experiencing conflict Mediation For parents who: Want practical help to improve their relationship and settle disputes Want to focus on the future and what needs to change

Impact so far

Case Study Child living with mum and new partner. Communication with dad minimal for 3 years due to distance & language barriers. Prior to the mediation, the parties would involve their child in the disputes between them, which was having a detrimental effect on him. Following the round table meeting, the parties agreed to make a concerted effort to keep the child out of their disputes. They clearly showed intention and a desire to improve matters. Communication improved, the Court was pleased and included mediation date and time in the Court Order. The parties advised that the mediation process has helped them manage any conflict which may arise. They found that channels of communication that had previously been closed between them had opened. They also realised their behaviour was not constructive parenting.

For more information please contact: fsc.team@hertfordshire.gov.uk

On a different note……… Just a reminder to please fill in the survey in FSC News Emotional wellbeing/mental health training survey Your input is very important as it will help to give us a clearer picture of the levels of confidence and training needs for frontline staff working with children and young people with emotional wellbeing/mental health concerns