Dating violence: For Teens and Young Adults Facilitator: Janessa Rivera, Owner of R.E.B.I.R.T.H Journey LLC

What is Dating violence? Dating Violence is the physical, sexual, or emotional abuse between a couple. Used to describe the abuse between individuals in a dating relationship between the ages of 13-24 years old. Also identified as Teen Dating Violence (TDV)

Facts about Dating violence February is Teen Dating Violence Awareness Month. Young ladies ages 16-24 years old experience the highest rate of dating violence, at a rate of 3 times more than the national average of Domestic violence reported incidences in people ages 25+ years. 50% of young people who experience teen dating violence including situations like rape, physical, and/or sexual abuse will attempt suicide. 1.5 million HS students nationwide experience dating violence annually. Of the reported Dating Violence victims, 21% are females and 10% are males. Twelve states in the U.S. don’t allow a victim of dating violence to apply for protection under their civil domestic violence restraining/protective order laws. These states are: Alabama, Arizona, Georgia, Kentucky, Maryland, New York, Ohio, Oregon, South Carolina, South Dakota, Utah, and Virginia.

Activity: have audience stand up and take a step forward for each thing they have experienced with a past/current significant other. Start off the activity by saying the phrase “Has your significant other ever …” Been jealous Checked your phone/texts Checked your social media Called you negative names Been controlling Kept you from hanging out with or talking to family/friends Gone days without speaking to you bc they are upset Been possessive Made you feel guilty for saying No to them about something Pressured you into having sex, sexting, or sending nudes/videos Made you fear doing something to cause them to be upset for fear of their reaction towards you Embarrassed you in public Yell at you in public Threaten to break up with you if you don’t do exactly what they say/want Punch, pinch, push, shove, pull your hair, poke your eye, smack, slap, spit on you

If you stepped up for any of the questions during the previous activity, you may have been a victim of dating violence and an unhealthy relationship.

Signs of dating violence: PHYSICAL ABUSE: Using force to hurt or restrain an individual Punching Pinching Pushing/shoving Poking Pulling Hair Smacking/Slapping Spitting Mushing Grabbing Kicking

Signs of dating violence: EMOTIONAL ABUSE: Using words, verbal threats, and manipulation to control and hurt an individual Threatening Name calling Teasing Shaming Embarrassing in public Controlling who to befriend/talk to/hang with Manipulation Guilt Tripping Controlling behavior Monitoring phone/text/social media Blaming you for their anger or how they negatively react

Signs of dating violence: SEXUAL ABUSE: Forcing unwanted sexual activity or advances, blackmailing and coercing with sexually explicit photos/videos Rape Using guilt to obtain sexting, sexual videos, sexually graphic photos Forcing oneself on to the other with out consent Posting/Sharing private photos/videos without consent Using drugs or alcohol to impair the individual and force them into sexual activity

What to do if you or someone you know experience Dating Violence? Tell some one you trust, preferably a parent or adult such as a counselor or teacher Separate and give yourself space from the abuser Call National Hotline 1-866-331-9474 Text LOVEIS to 22522 Download these Phone Apps: ONE Love Foundation - Guide to help user decide of the acts they are experiencing are unhealthy Circle of 6 - App that can be used amongst friends as a private chat that will help code conversation to be able to ask for help from another user without the abuser finding out

Things to say to Youth who are suffering from Dating Violence “It’s not your fault” “I want you safe” “You don’t deserve thus, you deserve respect” “This is important” “What do you need” “I am glad you told me” “I am here if you need me or ever want to talk” “Thank you for trusting me”

Broken Crayon closing Exercise Give everyone a piece of paper Hand out crayons- some broken and some whole Ask each person to draw a heart with their crayon on the paper and inside of the heart write SELF LOVE #BrokenCrayonsStillColor

About The Presenter Janessa Rivera Email: the.rebirth.journey@gmail.com Website: https://riveraj5.wixsite.com/rebirthjourneyllc/bio Instagram: @rebirth_journey Facebook: The Rebirth Journey