Research Presentation Maoliosa Phelan

An exploration into the how the mind is responsible for the creation of our realities.

Voices Voices Voices Voices Voices Voices Voices Voices Voices Voices

Internal Turmoil Mentally exhausted by my own mind,   Mentally exhausted by my own mind, My own worst enemy, my best critique, Everyday a battle to keep myself sane, Constantly fighting, Fighting to be at peace with myself, Fighting to be at peace with the world around me, Fighting to be at peace with my own reality. Angry voices, loud voices, cruel voices Reminding me that I am not good enough. Analytical voices, quite voices, critical voices, Reminding me of all the things I should and shouldn’t have done. Expectations, Expectations for myself, Unrelenting standards, Expectations of others, Constant disappointment, Expectations of life, Endless pain. Dark voices, Sad voices, Hurt voices Consistently reminding me of my agony Loud voices, Louder and Louder voices Each day their volume increases

Pain is a strange feeling, Driving me forward, Dragging me down, Crippling, yet strengthening Pain for myself, Pain for others.   A constant mental battle to supress these voices, A fight within my mind, A fight that I am loosing, loosing and loosing, Anger, An anger lies deep within, Anger at the world, Anger at myself, Anger at others, Anger in injustice, Anger in betrayal. Anger in cruelness. Anger in loneliness. Anger in sadness. Anger for being angry.

Why did these voices choose my head to be there home? Why do they have to be so cruel? What can one do, when you have lost control of your own thoughts?   Enough, Whatever is. Pretty enough? Happy enough? Kind enough? Sane enough? Fun enough? Normal enough? Successful enough? Friendly enough? Calm enough? Enough is enough.

Fighting for a clear thought, Fighting for some clarity, Always hazy,   Fighting for a clear thought, Fighting for some clarity, Always hazy, Driving me crazy. A cacophony of endless voices, Turbulence, Losing control, An internal explosion. So I hit my head against the wall and scream, Scream so loud that even the voices cannot be heard. Scream so loud that my head explodes. No more voices, Silence, For I have won.

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