The Wind—Compound Elements

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Presentation transcript:

The Wind—Compound Elements

Rough Draft has thirty-four sentences. Compound sentences—18 ands 2 Rough Draft has thirty-four sentences. Compound sentences—18 ands Compound elements—2 ands

2 Rough draft—Narrative [1]He began to walk, and a gentle breeze was blowing. He was walking to the college campus, and his walk was going to be four miles long. [2] He had gone no more than a mile, and the wind had begun blowing in gusts. It whipped the branches of the trees, and he pulled up gloves from his backpack, and he pulled his knit cap from his backpack, too, and he sipped up his windbreaker. [3] The November leaves blew across the two lane road, and it was in the country. The leaves scraped along the asphalt, and they flattened against hog-wire fences. They swirled in front of large rocks, and they swirled in front of concrete culverts. They settled in the ditches.

3 [4] The mountains were to the east, and snowflakes blew in from them. They were sparse and tiny. The snowflakes danced like tiny dragonflies, and they swirled like them too. The snowflakes swarmed westward across the valley. [5] He lowered his head, and he walked on. He pulled up his collar to protect his neck. The wind played tunes, and they were rich, and they were varied. [6] The wind’s breathy rush blew through the fir trees like a torrent of water, and he could hear the rattle and scrape of the dry cornstalk leaves, and this sounded like an avalanche of small stones. [7] Behind it all was the harmonic moan of the power lines, and they were rising like the wail of bagpipes, and they were falling like the wail of bagpipes.

Final Draft has seven sentences. Compound Sentences—0 ands 4 Final Draft has seven sentences. Compound Sentences—0 ands Compound Elements 8—ands Series—2 ands

4 Narrative: The Wind  When he began the four-mile walk to the campus, a gentle breeze was blowing. He had gone no more than a mile when the wind began to blow in gusts, whipping the branches of the trees and causing him to pull his gloves and his knit cap from his backpack and zip up his windbreaker. The November leaves blew across the two-lane county road, scraping along the asphalt, flattening against hog-wire fences, swirling in front of large racks and concrete culverts, and settling in the ditches. Blowing in from the mountains to the east, sparse and tiny snowflakes danced, swirled like tiny dragonflies, and swarmed westward across the valley. He lowered his head and walked on, pulling up his collar to protect his neck as the wind played rich and varied tunes. As the wind’s breathy rush blew through the fir trees like a torrent of water, he could hear the rattle and scrape of the dry cornstalk leaves, sounding like an avalanche of small stones.

7 Behind it all was the harmonic moan of the power lines, rising and falling like the wail of bagpipes.