Language & Power

Powerless Language Hedges “I’m kinda disappointed…” “I think we should…” “I guess I’d like to…” Hesitations “Uh, can I have a minute of your time…” “Well, we could try this idea…” “I wish you would – er – try to be on time…”

Powerless Language Intensifiers “I’m really glad to see you.” “I’m not very hungry.” Polite Forms - “Excuse me, sir…”

Powerless Language Tag Questions “It’s about time we got started, isn’t it?” Don’t you think we should give it another try?” Disclaimers “I probably shouldn’t say this but…” “I’m not really sure but…”

Pronoun Use & Its Effects Language “We” “You” (+) Takes Responsibility for thoughts, feelings, & wants. Less defensive than “you” language. (+) Inclusion, immediacy, cohesion, & commitment. (+) Signals other orientation, particularly when topic is positive. (-) can be perceived egotistical & self-absorbed. (-) Can speak improperly for others. (-) Can be evaluative & judgmental, especially during a confrontation. Use “I” message when other person doesn’t perceive a problem. Combine “I” language with “we” language. Combine with “I” language. Use in group settings to promote unity. Avoid when expressing personal thoughts, feelings, & wants. Use “I” language during confrontations. Use “you” language when praising or including others.