Chapter 12 Parenting 1

Chapter 12: Parenting Introduction Quote: “To be in your children’s memories tomorrow, you have to be in their lives today.” Barbara Johnson, Literary Critic

Chapter 12: Parenting Introduction True or False? Parents, compared to nonparents, report higher marital satisfaction.

Chapter 12: Parenting Introduction Answer: FALSE A study of the effect children have on marital satisfaction found that: Parents (both women and men) reported lower marital satisfaction than nonparents. Mothers of infants reported the most significant drop in marital satisfaction. The higher the number of children, the lower the marital satisfaction. Factors that depressed marital satisfaction were conflict and loss of freedom.

What are the major roles of parents?

PHOTO ESSAY: Parenting Roles Caregiver Emotional Resource Economic Resource Teacher Protector Health Promotion Ritual Bearer: birthdays, holidays, weddings

Transition to Parenthood The transition to parenthood refers to that period from the beginning of pregnancy through the first few months after the birth of a baby. The mother, father, and couple undergo changes and adaptations during this period.

Transitions to Parenthood Transitions to Motherhood A woman’s initial reaction is influenced by whether the baby was intended. Although childbirth is sometimes thought of as painful, some women describe the experience as fantastic, joyful, and unsurpassed. Emotional bonding may be temporarily impeded by a mild depression, characterized by irritability, crying, loss of appetite, and difficulty sleeping. Baby Blues (24-48 hours after baby is born) Postpartum Depression (first month after birth) Postpartum Psychosis (wanting to harm the baby)

Transitions to Parenthood Transitions to Fatherhood Children Benefit from Involved Fathers: Make good grades Less involved in crime Good health/self-concept Have a strong work ethic Have durable marriages Have a strong moral conscience Have higher life satisfaction Have higher incomes as adults Have higher education levels

Transitions to Parenthood Transitions to Fatherhood Children Benefit from Involved Fathers: Form close friendships Have stable jobs Have fewer premarital births Have lower child sex abuse Exhibit fewer anorexic symptoms

Transitions to Parenthood Transition from a Couple to a Family The birth of a baby is usually a stressor event for each parent and for their relationship regardless of whether the child is biological or adopted and regardless of whether the parents are heterosexual or homosexual. Regardless of how children affect the feelings spouses have about their marriage, spouses report more commitment to their relationship once they have children.

Percentage of Couples Getting Divorced by Number of Children

Parenthood: Some Facts Parents are only one influence in a child’s development Others include siblings, teachers, media, and the Internet Each child is unique Parents soon become aware of how each child is different from every other child they know Each gender is unique Boys are not always emotionally resilient though they are not taught to be open about their feelings as girls are.

Diana Baumrind 1966 Responsiveness: the extent to which parents respond to & meet the emotional needs of their children. how supportive parents are, warmth, person centered communication, attachment Demandingness: manner in which parents place demand on their children regarding expectation/discipline how much control monitoring confrontation

Parenting Styles

Parenthood: Some Facts Parenting Styles Differ Permissive parents are high on responsiveness and low on demandingness. Authoritarian parents are high on demandingness and low in responsiveness. Authoritative parents are both demanding and responsive. Uninvolved parents are low in responsiveness and demandingness.

Classwork Principles of Effective Parenting Review pages 344-351 Write down the 12 principles of effective parenting Write down the top 4 principles that are the most important for you as a future parent. Why?

Principles of Effective Parenting Give time, love, praise, and encouragement Since children depend on their parents for the development of their emotional security, parents must provide a warm emotional context in which the children can develop. Avoid overindulgence Avoid giving children too much, too soon, and for too long.

Principles of Effective Parenting Monitor child’s activities/drug use Abundant research suggests that parents who know where their children are and who they are with are less likely to report that their adolescents are involved in delinquent behavior such as drinking alcohol, poor academic performance, and sexual activity.

Principles of Effective Parenting Monitor television and pornography exposure Research shows that teens watch an average of 4.5 hours of TV daily and use 1.5 hours of non-school Internet. Also, research indicates that there are negative effects of pornography exposure on teens. Develop sexist/unhealthy notions of sex and relationships Boys/young men are more likely to support attitudes of sexual coercion Increase likelihood of perpetrating assault Unrealistic expectations

Principles of Effective Parenting Use technology to monitor cell phone/text messaging use Teens may be sending inappropriate text messages. Cell phone apps and other protective devices allow parents to monitor activity and/or control the functions of their child’s mobile phone. Set limits and discipline children for inappropriate behavior The goal of guidance is self-control. Guidance may involve reinforcing desired behavior or providing limits to children’s behavior.

Principles of Effective Parenting Have family meals Parents who stay connected with their children build strong relationships with them and report fewer problems. Encourage responsibility Giving children increased responsibility encourages the autonomy and independence they need to be assertive and self-governing.

Principles of Effective Parenting Establish norm of forgiveness Forgiveness is a complex time-involved process rather than a one-time cognitive event. Teach emotional confidence Experiencing, expressing, and regulating emotion.

Principles of Effective Parenting Provide sex education Although parents may be reluctant to discuss safe sex, their doing so often has positive consequences. Express confidence If the parents show the child that they have confidence in him or her, the child begins to accept these social definitions as real and becomes more self-confident.

Principles of Effective Parenting Respond to Teen Years Creatively Catch them doing what you like rather than criticizing them for what you don’t like. Be direct when necessary. Provide information rather than answers. Be tolerant of high activity levels. Engage in leisure activity with your teenagers. Use technology to encourage safer driving.

Principles of Effective Parenting Ten steps to Talking With Teens about Sex: Know yourself Remember that it’s not about you Stop talking! Start listening! You get only one question Do something else About pleasure and pain Be cool like a cucumber Bring it on! Never surrender

Child-Rearing Theories Parents are encouraged to combine approaches to find what works best for them and their child. Various approaches Developmental-Maturational Approach Behavioral Approach Parent Effectiveness Training Approach Socioteleological Approach Attachment Parenting

Theories of Child Rearing

Theories of Child Rearing (Cont.)

Single-Parenting Issues A single-parent family is one in which there is only one parent. The other parent is completely out of the child’s life through death, sperm donation, or complete abandonment. A single-parent household is one in which one parent typically has primary custody of the child or children but the parent living out of the house is still a part of the child’s family. Single Mothers by Choice

Single-Parenting Issues Challenges Faced by Single Parents Responding to the demands of parenting with limited help Resolving the issue of adult sexual needs Lack of money Guardianship Prenatal care Absence of a father (or mother) Negative life outcomes for the child in a single-parent family Perpetuation of single-family structure

The Future of Parenting The future of parenting will involve new contexts for children and new behaviors that children learn and parents tolerate. While parents will continue to be the primary context in which their children are reared, because the financial need for both parents to earn an income will increase, children will increasingly end up in day care, afterschool programs, and day camps during the summer.