Communication Fails https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=t1qDt-DvmPw https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=nhe0KSGoUgc&index=2&list=RD0QuVzUnquv0

What makes a conversation crucial? Role Play: 1 male & 1 female volunteer When does this conversation becomes crucial?

What makes a conversation crucial? Opposing Opinions Strong Emotions Crucial Examples of crucial conversations: ending a relationship, talking to a coworker you disagree with, giving a supervisor feedback, asking a roommate to change, educating residents. Conversations High Stakes

Three Choices for crucial conversations We can avoid them. We can face them & handle them poorly. We can face them & handle them well. What are the benefits of handling them well? Improve relationship, improve personal health, improve company

What crucial conversation do I need to have? Hold the correct crucial conversation with CPR Content: Address a first time issue. Pattern: Address their continuation of negative behaviors (or their behavior when you address the issue - process). Relationship: Discuss how this is affecting the community/you. Body designed wrong for heightened emotions—adrenaline is pumped into your bloodstream. Brain diverts blood to high priority tasks (hitting and running—fight or flight). Blood is diverted away from your brain. Self-defeating example: husband has long hours @ work. You want to spend time with him and you nag him. He is bothered by the nagging and distances himself farther. You are even more upset. Any examples of crucial conversations that have gone poorly?

CPR practice: John Lets You Down Yesterday John, a resident who lives in your building, agreed to stop pranking the other residents. You’ve talked to John a few times before. You’re worried, because it didn’t really seem like you got to him. Therefore, you feel the pranks might continue. Sure enough, when you come home in the evening, residents come to you complaining that John had pranked them again. You called him to see why he had been involved in more pranks. He explained, “I have a good excuse! Those idiots left their door open, and I had to teach them a safety lesson.” What crucial conversation must you hold to get unstuck? (Content, Pattern, or Relationship?) Pattern and possibly Relationship