Moving Past Imposter Syndrome Wendy Pastrick

Who? Technical professional using Microsoft SQL Server since 2000 Several years of consulting experience Microsoft MVP since 2013 Sr. Database Performance Engineer at Salesforce PASS Board of Directors since 2013

Imposter Syndrome A term defining a concept describing high-achieving individuals who are marked by an inability to internalize their accomplishments and a persistent fear of being exposed as a "fraud".  https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Impostor_syndrome

Self Doubt Impostor syndrome often is borne out of constantly facing a distorted reality, one in which your abilities are constantly questioned while those around you bluster in self-confidence sheltered by ignorance.

Alicia Liu

Misrepresentation Sometimes you just really don’t know something But, you are able to learn it or find an answer Confidence issues Over confidence can be just as damaging as lack of confidence Alicia Liu https://medium.com/@aliciatweet/impostor-syndrome-is-not-just-a-confidence-problem-dea670e59f6e#.dodhkevvm

What if… Myth of Meritocracy Environmental Factors It doesn’t matter what you do, it will never be good enough You will not succeed Others will take the credit Environmental Factors Ignoring contributions or suggestions Over compensating with extra hours of work https://modelviewculture.com/pieces/how-the-rhetoric-of-imposter-syndrome-is-used-to-gaslight-women-in-tech Cate Huston: “What we call imposter syndrome often reflects the reality of an environment that tells marginalized groups that we shouldn’t be confident, that our skills aren’t enough, that we won’t succeed—and when we do, our accomplishments won’t even be attributed to us. Yet imposter syndrome is treated as a personal problem to be overcome, a distortion in processing rather than a realistic reflection of the hostility, discrimination, and stereotyping that pervades tech culture.” Alexis Hancock: a black woman in tech “It’s a badge of honor to stay up doing midnight releases and drink absurd amounts of coffee. Portraying the image of the burdened genius is way more accepted than admitting that you are burnt out from settling bugs all day and that you don’t want to look at code when you get home. With the cloud of imposter syndrome hovering over me, I convinced myself that I did not work hard enough to deserve a moment to relax. Instead of putting the laptop down, I was focused on learning everything I could in my free time. I began to suffer from more frequent anxiety attacks, weight gain, and an overall clouded state of mind.”

Cate Hudson “What we call imposter syndrome often reflects the reality of an environment that tells marginalized groups that we shouldn’t be confident, that our skills aren’t enough, that we won’t succeed—and when we do, our accomplishments won’t even be attributed to us. Yet imposter syndrome is treated as a personal problem to be overcome, a distortion in processing rather than a realistic reflection of the hostility, discrimination, and stereotyping that pervades tech culture.”

Robert Weiss, LCSW “That’s one of the most disturbing things about gaslighting, that even incredibly intelligent and emotionally healthy people are vulnerable.”

External Factors  https://xkcd.com/385/

Is It Me? Discrimination Racism Sexism Marginalized Oppression Marginalized : treat a person, group or concept as insignificant or peripheral Discrimination: the unjust or prejudicial treatment of different categories of people or things, especially on the grounds of race, age, or sex. Racism: prejudice, discrimination, or antagonism directed against someone of a different race based on the belief that one's own race is superior. Sexism: prejudice, stereotyping, or discrimination, typically against women, on the basis of sex. Oppression: the state of being subject to unjust treatment or control.

Cause and Effect Sometimes, it’s not intentional yet the effect is all the same.

Yes, You Should Be Having Fun

Reality http://alicialiu.me/

Self Doubt Alicia Liu

Example “Oh the irony. Haven't written a blog post in months because I think much of this SQL on Linux stuff is too basic, and then I run across all of you newcomers and your numerous posts on the topic. How to log in, how to update, how to check running processes! Churn 'em out many and often! 10,000 hits per day versus my measly sum  yes I'm jealous and wish I stopped being so fastidious about content and just put it out!”

and Another Brand new MVP upon congratulations

Move Forward

Read More https://modelviewculture.com/pieces/how-the-rhetoric-of-imposter-syndrome-is-used-to- gaslight-women-in-tech https://medium.com/@aliciatweet/impostor-syndrome-is-not-just-a-confidence-problem- dea670e59f6e#.tayskdv4f https://medium.com/@aliciatweet/overcoming-impostor-syndrome- bdae04e46ec5#.nojd387g8 http://www.forbes.com/sites/taranelson/2012/04/26/the-upside-of-imposter-syndrome- lessons-from-women-in-tech/#6437d5d734f0 http://startupbros.com/21-ways-overcome-impostor-syndrome/