#likeaBOSS I will read the prompt to figure out the TASK I’m being asked to complete. I will read the prompt to figure out the AUDIENCE to whom I’m writing. I will read the prompt to figure out the PURPOSE of my writing. I will do all of these things #likeaBOSS

Agenda TAPping the PROMPT. Quick Review for FPMA 2. Be prepared: Open to the first free page in your classwork section of your spiral Have a pen or pencil TAPping the PROMPT. Quick Review for FPMA 2. Agenda

T= Task A= Audience P= Purpose #thisagain? #BOSSesdontcry Today’s focus

TAP Explained Task: what the writer needs to focus on and do Audience: Who would read this Not always clear You might have to infer Presume an educated, mature audience if no clues are given. Purpose: The reason for writing -- informative or argumentative #breakitdown #likeaBOSS

Prompt 1 Determine the task, audience and purpose for the prompt. Write them on your paper. Write an informational essay to explain how advancements in 3-D technology can benefit society. Your ideas must be based on ideas, concepts, and information from the passage set. #killin’it

Prompt 1 TASK: Explain how 3D technology benefits society. AUDIENCE: PURPOSE: #yupyup

Prompt 1 #hanginthere >> TASK: Explain how 3D technology benefits society. AUDIENCE: Since there is no specific audience cited, Write it with your focus on an authority figure BUT explain it so that anyone will understand. PURPOSE: #yupyup

Prompt 1 TASK: Explain how 3D technology benefits society. AUDIENCE: Since there is no specific audience cited, Write it with your focus on an authority figure BUT explain it so that anyone will understand. PURPOSE: Directly in the text it explains that this is an informational essay. #yupyup

Prompt 1 Three-dimensional technology will benefit society. What would the claim look like? It so simple … it’s so easy … Three-dimensional technology will benefit society. #writingclaimslikeaBOSS

Prompt 2 Determine the task, audience and purpose for the prompt. Write them on your paper. Write an informational essay to explain how music can unite people in uncommon circumstances or situations. Your ideas must be based on ideas, concepts, and information from the passage set. #itisntthatahardforaBOSS

#learningstinks >> Prompt 2 TASK: Explain how music can unite people in uncommon circumstances or situations. AUDIENCE: PURPOSE: #yupyup

Prompt 2 TASK: Explain how music can unite people in uncommon circumstances or situations. AUDIENCE: Since there is no specific audience cited, Write it with your focus on an authority figure BUT explain it so that anyone will understand. PURPOSE: #yupyup

Prompt 2 TASK: Explain how music can unite people in uncommon circumstances or situations. AUDIENCE: Since there is no specific audience cited, Write it with your focus on an authority figure BUT explain it so that anyone will understand. PURPOSE: Directly in the text it explains that this is an informational essay. #yupyup

Prompt 2 What would the claim look like? It so simple … it’s so easy … Music can unite people in uncommon circumstances or situations. #writingclaimslikeaBOSS

Prompt 3 Determine the task, audience and purpose for the prompt. Write them on your paper. Write an informational essay to explain how automotive transportation will change in the coming years. Your ideas must be based on ideas, concepts, and information from the passage set. #yougotthis

#ifFPMA1wasagokart >> #crashandburn >> #stayfocused >> #youneedthis >> Prompt 3 TASK: Explain how automotive transportation will change in the coming years. AUDIENCE: PURPOSE:

Prompt 3 TASK: Explain how automotive transportation will change in the coming years. AUDIENCE: Since there is no specific audience cited, Write it with your focus on an authority figure BUT explain it so that anyone will understand. PURPOSE: #yupyup

Prompt 3 TASK: Explain how automotive transportation will change in the coming years. AUDIENCE: Since there is no specific audience cited, Write it with your focus on an authority figure BUT explain it so that anyone will understand. PURPOSE: Directly in the text it explains that this is an informational essay. #yupyup

Prompt 3 What would the claim look like? It so simple … it’s so easy … Technology fundamentally will change automotive transportation in the coming years. #writingclaimslikeaBOSS

Taking Out Personal Pronouns STOP using “I” and “you”! Write in third person Exception: sometimes “we” is okay Don’t overuse “people” “One” is not the only option! Specific alternatives: “The reader” or “readers” “Audiences”, “listeners” or “viewers” “It is common knowledge that…” “High school juniors…” Bad example: I think that people should seriously, like, spend more time fixing their grammar before they hit send. Revised example: Students benefit from spending more time editing before submitting their work. Taking Out Personal Pronouns My face when you start a sentence with “I think”… #overdone #justsayit

Slang & Conversational Tone Don’t use words that reveal your age! Words to avoid: texting abbreviations, emoticons, etc. “Yeah”, “like” Vague words: “things”, “stuff”, “it” Conversational words or transitions Actual questions (to self) Bad example: So, why does gymnastics even matter? I mean, isn’t it really limited to a specific body type anyway? Revised example: Gymnastics’ relevance is questionable to some people, since only a select few have the physical ability to meet its demands. Slang & Conversational Tone #growup >>>

Synonym Upgrades Replace vague words with specifics Avoid words used too often, even nouns or keywords “Upgrade” to a better synonym that makes you sound older Don’t go too far: always using super-long, collegiate-sounding, multisyllabic words can backfire and sound pretentious. Bad example: It is really important that we do something about this. Our schools have a problem, and if something doesn’t change, there will be problems. Revised example: It is critical that schools find a solution to this crisis. The American educational system is flawed, and if both administrators and taxpayers refuse to address the situation, then our country could see low test scores for several generations. Synonym Upgrades My face when you use the same word 5 times… in one paragraph… #thesaurus #rilly?

Confident, Active Word Choices Cut out “I think”, “I believe”, and “In my opinion”/ “My opinion is” Use strong verbs Ideal: action verbs Less effective: “being” verbs Is, am, are, was, were, be, being, been Which sounds better? I think he took it? He stole it. I believe that grammar is important. Grammar matters. In my opinion, the Kardashians have no real talent and shouldn’t be famous. The Kardashians lack any real talent; their fame was not earned. Confident, Active Word Choices Show some #sass.

Active Voice Use it when: Subject is doing the action You are confident in your answer Someone is taking responsibility Subject is doing the action Usually shorter & more direct anyway! Examples: The United States refused to negotiate. Negotiations were rejected by the United States. Students earn their grades. Grades were earned by the students. The judge made a decision. Passive: A decision was made by the judge. Active Voice My face when your sentences get to the point… #applause

Passive Voice Typically longer and less direct Often has the word “by” Examples: Mistakes were made. Active: He made mistakes. Letters are being mailed. I mailed the letters. Grades were passed out. The teacher passed out grades. He was fired. Active: His boss fired him. Typically longer and less direct Often has the word “by” Often uses being verbs Use it when: You want to avoid responsibility or blame You don’t want to throw anyone under the bus You want to hide who did it Passive Voice My face when you take the long way to say it #ownit

Get to the Point Cut redundancy Cut unnecessary perfect tenses Bad example: It is important and critical that everyone involved should immediately write down everything they have witnessed before they forget it. Revised example: It is important for witnesses to write down what they saw before they forget any details. Cut redundancy Cut unnecessary perfect tenses Cut adverbs and adjectives that aren’t needed (especially if they aren’t vivid or magical) Short, simple sentences in strategic moments for dramatic effect or emphasis. Get to the Point My unimpressed face when you use FAR more words than needed to say something simple #notDickens #so1843

Formal Transitions Words & Phrases Entire Sentences Use the basics… First, second, third, next In addition In conclusion, finally …AND the better ones: However, rather, instead Therefore, moreover Do NOT refer to yourself “Next I will tell you about…” “My next point…” “As I mentioned before…” Instead: Next, … As previously mentioned, Formal Transitions My face when you label your next point instead of just saying it… #spititout

Are you asking or telling me? Bad: You might wonder, “Why do Olympians choke under pressure?” Better: Viewers may wonder why Olympians struggle under pressure. Don’t “ask yourself”, “wonder”, etc. Don’t literally ask a question, hypothetical or real Just state WHO wonders WHAT. My face when you pose an actual question… #writeinthirdperson #notnecessary #witheveryquestiona puppydies Are you asking or telling me?

Don’t Talk About it – Just DO it! Bad example: “Today I will teach you why Coke is better than Pepsi.” Revised example: “Coke is superior to Pepsi for three reasons.” Never talk directly about the (essay) writing itself. Avoid: “In this essay, I will…” “Today I am going to…” “For my next point, I will tell you…” “My next reason is that…” “All of my reasons prove that…” “This quote proves my thesis because…” Don’t Talk About it – Just DO it! My face when you tell me what your essay will say… instead of just saying it. #Nike #justdoit

Bad: Smoking causes cancer. Better: There is a direct correlation between smoking and cancer. Bad: All marching band students get into Harvard. Better: Students in the arts have a higher tendency to be admitted into Ivy league schools. No word choices that are TOO extreme when they don’t apply! Avoid: Any, always, never, must, etc. Be careful with “__ causes ___.” Don’t say things that can’t be proven, are illogical, or are too difficult to believe. (You don’t want to provoke someone into saying “Really?” or “Prove it.”) Avoiding Absolutes Tell me more about how you “always” are “literally” unable to get out of bed in the morning…#really #yeahright

Bonus Tips: Dead Giveaways These are NOT absolute rules, but they are guidelines that COULD vary by genre, purpose, or audience. Negatives Don’t use parentheses Avoid contractions Avoid jargon (vocabulary your audience will not know) Don’t attack anyone Positives Cite facts first and then explain Acknowledge counterarguments Bonus Tips: Dead Giveaways

What common advice have you noticed in all this advice? How can you tell if writing is “formal” or “informal”? When or why do you want to be able to write formally? Opinion: What would be a good synonym for “formal” writing? REVIEW Questions

This INTRODUCTION paragraph is from an essay about literacy. Reminders: Slang and conversational word choices Confident, active word choices Active voice Get to the point: Short sentences for dramatic effect “Upgrading” your synonyms Formal transitions Taking out personal pronouns Are you asking me, or are you telling me? Don’t talk about it – just DO it. Avoiding absolutes People everywhere know that it’s like a crime to not send your kids to school. What people don’t know is that sending a kid to school is not enough; they also need to read to children at home. Students who are not read to enough won’t ever have lives as good as kids who read well. Early literacy is super important for learning vocabulary, getting reading skills, and building speaking fluency. Revision Paragraph #1

This INTRODUCTION paragraph is from an essay about the importance of teaching young children to read. Reminders: Slang and conversational word choices Confident, active word choices Active voice Get to the point: Short sentences for dramatic effect “Upgrading” your synonyms Formal transitions Taking out personal pronouns Are you asking me, or are you telling me? Don’t talk about it – just DO it. Avoiding absolutes Most parents know that it is like a crime to not send their kids to school. However, parents may not know that a child merely attending school is not enough; caregivers also need to read to children at home. Students who are not read to enough are more likely to suffer academically and financially in the long term, compared to kids who read well. Early literacy is super critical for acquiring vocabulary, developing reading skills, and building speaking fluency. Paragraph #1: REVISED

This BODY paragraph is from a local letter to the editor about a tax levy on the ballot during an election season. (Do you remember what kinds of words to cut, avoid, or use?) Second, voters need to understand that effects will indubitably be felt economically by homeowners if we do not comprehensively support our schools. It is proven that lower-achieving schools cause home values to drop. If you do not pay up now, you will lose money when your house sells for less (or no one wants to buy it at all). Stop being cheap and support the future of our children AND our neighborhood! Revision Paragraph #2

This BODY paragraph is from a local letter to the editor about a tax levy on the ballot during an election season. (Do you remember what kinds of words to cut, avoid, or use?) In addition, voters need to understand that homeowners may also feel economic effects will indubitably be felt economically by homeowners if they do not financially support our schools now. It is proven that Lower-achieving schools tend to cause home values to drop because the area is less appealing to potential buyers. If voters choose not to invest in the short term, they risk long term loss of property value. Choose the best investment possible: our children AND our homes. Paragraph #2: REVISED

Get out one piece of your writing from this year. Pick something that is not well-edited or was written informally. HIGHLIGHT any words, phrases, or entire sentences that could be “upgraded” to more formal language. Revise those spots by adding, deleting, or replacing words. Get at least one other person to look at your changes. Did you miss any spots? Do you think you succeeded in making the writing more formal? Why or why not? Now YOU try!

List at least 5 things to avoid in formal writing: List at least 3 things that you SHOULD do in formal writing. 3. Revise these sentences to be more formal (such as for a formal email): So, I really think that you should buy my Girl Scout cookies? They’re awesome (obviously), and they cause instant happiness. They’re healthier than they used to be, and money from the sales will be spent by my troop to go on a super epic canoeing trip. Mini Quiz

List at least 5 things to avoid in formal writing: Contractions Passive voice Pretentious words Weak synonyms Redundancy and wordiness Personal pronouns List at least 3 things that you SHOULD do in formal writing. Active voice Strong verbs and synonyms Get to the point Specifics/ no vague words 3. Revise these sentences to be more formal (such as for a formal email): Please consider purchasing Girl Scout cookies from Troop 100. This year’s options are delicious, and there is a correlation between the new ingredients and a lift in mood. Many of the cookies have also dropped in calories and are comparatively more healthy than before. Troop 100 will use the proceeds for their annual canoe trip. Mini Quiz: Answer Key