Older people and emotional support Findings from the Someone To Talk To study Simon Anderson Lisa Given Please do not cite or quote without authors’ permission

A study about how people get through difficult times… …with a particular focus on the role and limits of talk

www.someonetotalkto.info

Academic theorising about therapeutic culture + Increasing policy focus on talking therapies

But little or no empirical grounding… Very little research about The experiences of the general population Everyday emotional difficulties The role (and limits) of talk

Not specifically about older people… But… Sample large enough to support separate analysis Age and generation emerged as important analytical themes

STTTS offers insights into older people’s views and experiences of ‘emotions talk’ in general formal and informal emotional support non talk based responses More generally, it allows examination of the cultural basis of older people’s engagement (or not) with psychological therapies

Older people have distinctive attitudes towards ‘emotions talk’ But generation needs to be understood in combination with gender

General attitudes towards emotions talk Agree strongly/ agree Neither agree nor disagree Disagree/ disagree strongly Don’t know I find it easy to talk about my feelings 55 20 25 * People spend too much time talking about their feelings 35 40 I grew up in the sort of household where people didn’t talk about their feelings 49 14 37 People nowadays spend more time talking about their feelings 67 12 2 It’s important to me to be able to talk about my feelings 68 18 - 10

Belonging to ‘most positive’ group by age group and sex (%) 11

% very or fairly likely to deal with difficulties through bottling things up

But are much more resistant to the idea of therapy or counselling Older people appear relatively open to discussing emotional problems with their GP But are much more resistant to the idea of therapy or counselling

Would feel v/f comfortable talking to GP/therapist if feeling worried, stressed or down, by age group (%)

Older people have fewer people they can turn to or talk to But there are important differences across the lifecourse for men and women

Proportion with three or more people could turn to, by age group and gender

Person most likely to turn to in face of emotional difficulty

Most likely to turn to same sex friend in face of emotional difficulty

% having face to face conversation with friends/family every day or almost every day

% having telephone conversation with friends/family every day or almost every day

% having text contact with friends/family every day or almost every day

Actual use of formal emotional support is markedly lower among those currently aged over 65 But we can’t assume that these patterns will hold as the baby boomers age

Contact with formal emotional support, ever, by age group (%) 23

We need to understand what (older) people do other than talk And to think about the implications for services

% very or fairly likely to deal with difficulties through shopping

% very or fairly likely to deal with difficulties through eating

% very or fairly likely to deal with difficulties through alcohol

% very or fairly likely to deal with difficulties through exercise

Some final questions Is older people’s self-reliance a resource or a problem? Is their reluctance to seek help a sign of resignation, resistance or resilience? What is the relationship between life stage and cohort effects? How will the beliefs and practices of older people change as the baby boomers enter older age? What implications might that have for service provision? Is there too great an emphasis on talk? How might the notion of ‘being there’ inform thinking about support for older people? What should the relationship be between the formal and the informal? How can the former support – and not undermine – the latter? How can valued elements of the latter (‘kind gestures’ etc.) be brought into the formal sphere? If we build it, will they come…?