Vocations

Vocations By Baptism, we are all called to live our lives completely and totally for God. How we choose to do this is our vocation. Commonly, the Catholic Church defines four vocations: Single Life Married Life Priesthood Religious Life

Marriage Matters “It is not good that the man should be alone …” (Gen 2:18) What is marriage? What is the importance of marriage to society? How are a husband and wife a sign of God’s love for each other, their children and their community?

The Second Creation Story presents us with several religious truths: After creation, with all its beauty and life, the world was not perfect – something was missing – the experience of being alone indicated that the human was incomplete. Awareness of human identity happens in and through the presence of the other. Mutual presence corrects the loneliness and offers completeness.

The man and woman become one flesh The man and woman become one flesh. They join bodily, share a home, become totally attached. Adam and Eve’s disobedience was an attempt to create what God had already created and given them (a complete human relationship with God). This fall from grace is called original sin.

The story of the fall identifies the following effects on the male/female relationship: They discover their nakedness – leaving them filled with shame – there is a boundary between them – they hide themselves and they are fearful Human freedom will always struggle with the desire to ‘be like God’ – a temptation that destroys our relationship with God, others and the world

Their shared ambition to be what they wanted rather than to become what their Creator had intended, taints the very heart of the relationship – it will now struggle to restore what had been theirs – harmony in communion with God. By rejecting their relationship with God, they lose their place in Eden and enter into an environment of disharmony in which they must earn their keep

Defining Marriage How does the Catholic Church understand marriage? From the Pastoral Constitution of the Church in the Modern World, marriage is described as: The intimate partnership of life and love which constitutes the married state has been established by the Creator.

It is rooted in the covenant of its partners, in their irrevocable personal consent. Marriage is built on the consent of the two. (p. 312) This love is open to procreation – love and new life are the gifts of marriage A valid marriage between baptized persons is a sacrament The central soul of marriage is LOVE.

Stages of Married Life The following stages help us see that the events and struggles of marriage can lead to fulfillment and maturity. Beginnings – every couple brings their own backgrounds including expectations for the roles of each spouse.

Stages of Married Life Romantic Love – usually a time of intense intimacy, closeness – requires the development of good communication. Power struggle – often hidden expectations of the other tend to crop up – constraints of time and energy can cause one to feel the other is not carrying their weight. This requires good negotiating skills and the ability to forgive.

Stability – depending on the success of the relationship in the past stage, a period of stability may result. Each person should be asking themselves if they are contributing to the marriage. They need to remain creative, rather than falling into routine and taking advantage of the relationship. Recommitment – usually around the mid-life point, a time for questioning one’s choices and commitments. There can be a tendency to live in a shell. Remaining creative and committed will result in deeper appreciation for the other.

Stages of Married Life Fruitfulness – Individuals need to find a balance between personal and mutual interests Growing old together – the last stage, both probably retired, now the issue is time. Often at this stage,they are seen as pillars of stability and wisdom for the young.

Marriage from the perspective of society New Social Cell: Marriage is an essential building block of society and because of this, ceremonies and licenses have been given legal protection. Marriages create and strengthen bonds among the members and the institutions in society and provide a stable environment for the growth and development of children.

Marriage from the perspective of society Legal Commitment: Society legalizes marriage in the form of a contract. Each spouse enters the contract promising to live in an exclusive and permanent relationship. An authority figure is present to ensure genuine vows are made. Protection of the law and certain social benefits exist for those who commit.

Marriage from the perspective of society Rite of Passage: In marriage, a couple enters into a new state of life. The ceremony, in which promises and vows are exchanged, uses gestures, symbols and words to publicly declare this new status.

Marriage from the perspective of society Institution Marriage has existed in one form or another throughout history. It is surrounded and protected by morality and customs. The ceremony involves witnesses representing various aspects of society.

Canadian Marriage Statistics 70% of families have married couples (decreasing) 16% are single parent 14% are common law (increasing)

Canadian Marriage Statistics 36% of marriages end in divorce in the first 30 years. Children who were born to a married couple who did not live together before marriage have a divorce rate of 13.6%. Children whose parents began as common law but then got married have a 25% chance of divorce. Children of common-law parents have a 63.1% chance of break-up.

The Permanency of Marriage in the Catholic Church Catholics believe that a valid and sacramental marriage is permanent and for life – it is ‘indissoluble’ The Catechism states – “Love seeks to be definitive; it cannot be an arrangement ‘until further notice’. The intimate union of marriage, as a mutual giving of two persons, and the good of the children, demand total fidelity from the spouses and require an unbreakable union between them” (1646)

The Permanency of Marriage in the Catholic Church A valid and sacramental marriage in the Catholic Church cannot be dissolved by civil authorities, however, sometimes a marriage covenant is void and invalid from the day of the wedding – when one or both do not fulfill the conditions of the marriage. If this is the case, the Church may determine, in its eyes, that the sacramental marriage is void and an annulment may be granted.

Marriage as a Sacrament Since 1563, the Church has considered marriage a sacramental act; a concrete sign of the advent of salvation through Jesus Christ and a source of sanctifying grace. As a married couple, they become a community of faith and love and a sign of the love of Christ. Love is a gift from one to another, but this gift is not a loan.

To be considered valid, 3 criteria must be met; It is fundamentally an experience of faith, calling for trust and commitment. It gives spouses the grace to love each other with the love which Christ has loved his Church The Holy Spirit revitalizes and renders the man and woman capable for the same love that Christ has for humanity. To be considered valid, 3 criteria must be met; No impediments may exist Church law must be observed Consent must be given

“My beloved is mine and I am his.” Son of Songs 2:16 “This at last is bone of my bones and flesh of my flesh; this one shall be called Woman, for out of Man this one was taken” (Gen 2:23) “My beloved is mine and I am his.” Son of Songs 2:16

Regarding the present debate in society on the definition of “marriage”, the Canadian Bishops made the following statement in September 2003: “The marriage of a man and a woman is not just one form of association or institutional model among others. It is the institution on which society is founded. The relationship created by marriage between a man and woman is a fundamental human reality which is at the basis of the social community. Marriage needs to be preserved as an institutional uniting of two persons of the opposite sex. For the common good of society, it must be protected… We reject the attempt of the State to reduce all intimate personal relationships to the same level, leading to the disappearance of the civil institution of marriage as understood in all human societies since time immemorial.

Canadian Bishops’ statement continued Because of the recognized contributions that the institution of marriage brings to the stability of the family and to the future of society, legislators have the duty of preserving the distinction between marriage and other forms of relationships involving two persons”.

Catholic Teaching and Same-Sex Marriage What is the purpose of marriage? The basic purposes of marriage are the good of the couple, and the procreation and education of children. In turn, the fulfillment of these purposes contributes to the good of society. For this reason, society has always affirmed the fundamental purposes of marriage: the personal commitment of the couple, which is publicly declared, and the procreation of children, upon whom the future of society depends.

If people of the same sex love each other, why can’t they get married? Love is a very important ingredient of marriage. But it is not the only one. Marriage not only recognizes love and commitment, but also the natural capacity of the couple to create children. There is a fundamental difference between a relationship that has the potential to create a child and one that does not. Since the future of humanity depends on the procreation of children, society has a vital interest in recognizing and protecting the relationship that ensures its future.

It is true that not all children are born within marriage and not all married couples have children. It is also true that same-sex partners can have children with the aid of a third person of the opposite sex and the aid of new technologies. But exceptions and variations do not undo a rule, and individual practices do not redefine the purposes of an institution. The biological fact remains that marriage between a man and a woman will usually result in children. The fact remains a powerful human reality even if some married couples, by choice or circumstance, do not have children. It makes marriage between a man and a woman a unique institution.

What difference does it make to traditionally married couples if same-sex partners are allowed to marry? Our laws are one of the ways we communicate our common values. With such a change, what we would be saying as a society is that the primary purpose of marriage is to validate and protect a sexually intimate adult relationship and that all else is secondary.