A magazine ran a Dilbert quotes contest. These are actual quotes from managers out there. Real-Life Dilbert Quotes.

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Presentation transcript:

A magazine ran a Dilbert quotes contest. These are actual quotes from managers out there. Real-Life Dilbert Quotes

As of tomorrow, employees will only be able to access the building using individual security cards. Pictures will be taken next Wednesday and employees will receive their cards in two weeks. (This was the winning quote from Charles Hurst at Sun Microsystems) Real-Life Dilbert Quotes

What I need is a list of specific unknown problems we will encounter. Real-Life Dilbert Quotes

How long is this Beta guy going to keep testing our stuff? Real-Life Dilbert Quotes

is not to be used to pass on information or data. It should be used only for company business. Real-Life Dilbert Quotes

Turnover is good for the company, as it proves that we are doing a good job in training people. Real-Life Dilbert Quotes

This project is so important, we can't let things that are more important interfere with it. Real-Life Dilbert Quotes

Doing it right is no excuse for not meeting the schedule. Real-Life Dilbert Quotes

No one will believe you solved this problem in one day! We've been working on it for months. Now, go act busy for a few weeks and I'll let you know when it's time to tell them. Real-Life Dilbert Quotes