Discipline

Discipline for children is very difficult They love looking and testing for boundaries You must set boundaries from the beginning and keep them the same Give them warnings before actually disciplining them so they understand what they are doing is wrong

MISBEHAVING Some of the more common ways they MISBEHAVE include: getting into things they aren’t supposed to not listening • fights with friends or siblings negative attempts to gain parents/ supervisors attention

Reasons for Misbehavior Stage of Growth: the child is behaving in a normal manner for the stage of growth he/she is in: power, attention, revenge, assumed inadequacy are normal Unfulfilled Needs: The child’s needs are not being met and she/he is acting out in order to try to get his/her needs met.

Reasons for Misbehavior Environment: The child is uncomfortable in or does not understand his/her environment. Doesn’t know Better: The child has not been taught the concept he/she is dealing with.

Try not to pay too much attention to negative behavior because it can encourage your child to think that is the way to get your attention. Ignore temper tantrums and crying

General Discipline Guidelines Set rules. Be specific and consistent. Avoid overwhelming your child by making too many rules. Offer choices when possible. Give lots of attention for good behavior. Avoid calling your child names like “bad boy” when he misbehaves. When you discipline your child, remain calm. NEVER yell, hit or scream at your child.

Types of Guidance Techniques

1. Natural and Logical Consequences Natural Consequences: occur without interference, child can see the result of their choices. Example: If you touch the hot stove with your hand, you get burned. Natural and Logical Consequences: Make the punishment fit the crime. Logical Consequences: should be relevant to the misbehavior. Example: A child colors on the wall, so they have to clean up the wall.

2. Positive Statements Clearly states what is expected, then help them get started When guiding children, phrase all requests in a positive manner Talk to children at their eye level when giving directions Example: say, “Let’s walk to the blocks,” rather than, “Don’t run to the blocks”

Praise Effective discipline also rewards your child for good behavior. Verbal rewards are easiest and best to let your child know you recognize her positive behavior. Be specific in your praise. Don’t just say, “You were a good girl today.” Make sure your behavioral expectations are appropriate for the developmental age of your child.

3. Redirection Children up to two years old can be easily distracted Get him to focus on something else. Example: if he is angry at the blocks area, lead him to a different area of the room and introduce a different activity

4. Reverse Attention When a child’s behavior is inappropriate, focus on a child who is displaying the appropriate behavior and make a positive comment Ignoring the negative, reinforcing the positive If the first child changes his behavior, he should be immediately reinforced with a positive statement.

5. Limited Choices Do not give him an unlimited choice unless he can really have what is chosen. Only give choices that are available. Example: “Do you want juice or water for a drink?” rather than, ‘What would you like to drink?”

TIME-OUTS A Time-out is probably the most effective discipline. You must remain consistent and calm. Be repetitive, even if you are tired or busy. It’s also important for anyone who spends time with the child, to remain consistent with limits. How To Give A Time-Out Isolate the child briefly from other children and activities. Use age as a guideline – three minutes for 3-year-olds and four minutes for 4-year-olds. Choose a time-out spot that is close enough for you to see, but is not an interesting place for your child to be Tell him one time what he has done wrong and send him to time-out. Time-out starts when your child is sitting quietly in his spot http://video.google.com/videosearch?q=supernanny+full+episodes&www_google_domain=www.google.com&emb=0&aq=0&oq=super+nanny+full+epi#

1. Your son has a ritual of a bed time story, tooth brushing, and a goodnight kiss. But after he is put to sleep, he comes into your room every night… WHAT DO YOU DO? A– Let him sleep in your room on the comforters on the floor. B– Keep returning him to his bed night after endless night. C– Give him a consequence: If he gets out of bed, he wont get to go to the park the next day.

Answer: B Kids love to cause drama and test your will so they will repeatedly do things like this. Consistency is key! After they realize that they are not allowed to stay in your room.. They will stop. Don’t give in!

2. You’re at a toy store buying a present for your niece when your 4 year old begs for a toy on the shelf. You tell her it’s too expensive and her whining escalates. WHAT DO YOU DO? A– Don’t give in but buy her a less expensive toy while your in the checkout line. B– Point out that she already has an alpine-size mountain of stuffed animals in her room so you won’t buy it. C– Tell her no, state your reasons, and then refuse to engage in any more talk about it.

Answer: C Show that when you make a decision, you intend to stand firm. If your child senses even the slightest hesitation, she’ll press the issue so keep your response as brief as possible. If she starts to get louder, give her the option of either calming down or leaving the store.

A– Have her say she’s sorry. 3. You’re chatting with other moms at the playground when your child swats another youngster as they fight over a toy. WHAT DO YOU DO? A– Have her say she’s sorry. B– Remove her immediately so she understands hitting is wrong. C– Take away her toy and tell her not to hit.

Answer: C Although it’s a good idea to have your child apologize to her playmate and then remover her from the playground if she gets more upset, the first thing you should do is take her hand, make eye contact and tell her “No hitting!” If she calms down and plays nicely from then on, be sure to offer her words of praise.

A– It’s time to put your shoes on because we’re leaving. 4. It’s time to leave the park, but your preschooler’s happily playing in the sandbox. He really doesn’t want to go and asks for more time. WHAT DO YOU DO? A– It’s time to put your shoes on because we’re leaving. B– Will you please put your shoes on and go to the car? C– If you don’t get into the car right now, I’m leaving!

Answer: A When you ask your child a question, you’re giving him control. Instead say specifically what you want. If possible, give him a five minute warning and stick to it.

Michael is not yet three years old and seems to be negative about everything. No matter what is said or asked of him, he answers with a defiant “NO!” Probably the best explanation for this behavior is that he is A. developing an antisocial personality. B. discovering and trying out his individuality. C. expressing some deep-seated hostility. D. frustrated by unreasonable limitations on his behavior.

Answer: B Children will test you to see what they can get away with.

The best way to encourage cooperation in children is to A. instruct them to be cooperative. B. provide them with good models for cooperative behavior. C. punish them for not cooperating. D. reward them with a cookie.

Answer: B They learn from others and modeling is a very effective way to get a desired behavior!

Of the following ways of dealing with a child’s aggressive behavior, the method that seems to work best is A. ignoring the child. B. isolating the child for a short period of time. (Time-out) C. spanking the child. D. yelling at the child.

Answer: B This is an easy one!