Managing Perceptions Professional Communication Conflict Resolution Team Building Dr. Melissa Campbell Leadership Emotional Intelligence Business Etiquette

The agenda Managing how we perceive others Evaluating how others perceive us

The person in the office next to you is normally very happy in the morning. Today, she is obviously upset about something. She tosses her things on the desk, grumbles under her breath, slam her desk drawers, and throws her coat on the chair. What are some possible explanations?

The process Observation – what actually happened? Grumpy co-worker Judgement – what is your explanation of why it happened? Validation – what supporting evidence do you have? Action Grumpy co-worker Fight with significant other Phone call from significant other “Sorry to hear about your relationship problems”

The Situation You scheduled a very important meeting for this morning at 8 am. You reminded your entire team about it several times and explained how important it was to you. You also gave clear information (verbally and in writing) about the date, time, and location.

“Joe” Star employee Overachiever Always goes the extra mile Extremely intelligent Can be impatient/rigid Arrives 20 minutes late WHY? “Jane” Average performer Extremely charismatic Sometimes lacks focus Good attitude Very creative Able to come up with great ideas Arrives 15 minutes late – WHY?

The process - Jane Observation – what actually happened? Late employee Judgement – what is your explanation of why it happened? Validation – what supporting evidence do you have? Action Late employee She is a slacker Past experience What do you say to her?

The process - Joe Observation – what actually happened? Late employee Judgement – what is your explanation of why it happened? Validation – what supporting evidence do you have? Action Late employee Something terrible must have happened Past experience What do you say to him?

“Jane” Left 45 minutes earlier than normal to make sure she was early. Was at a stop light and a car rear-ended her. When the police came to take the police report, she told them she would have to do it later because she was late for a meeting. Arrived 15 minutes late Reality Check “Joe” Went out with friends that were visiting from out of town. Got in very late, forgot to set an alarm. Arrived 20 minutes late

What’s the impact on the relationship(s)? What could you do to avoid this in the future?

Why would a reasonable, rational person act like this?

Johari Window

Actual Statements made to HR My boss wants me to quit – she always gives me more work than anyone else. My roommate in college acted just like her, she was arrogant too. I know he doesn’t respect me because when I talk to him, he don’t make eye contact. I can tell she thinks she is smarter than me so I just don’t add anything in meetings. He always make me repeat myself - I asked him if he has hearing problems. When I say hello to her in the hallway, he looks away as if he is too good to speak to me. I know she goes home at night and thinks up ways to make my life miserable.

Final Thoughts?