How to Make Your Writing Better

Common Errors This is a list of mistakes that almost 100 percent of students in both my journalism classes made.

The too-long sentence

Incorrect The Grammys, which were originally called the Grammophone Awards when they were first conceived in the late 50s, appeared on network television last night, and a British performer named Sam Smith, whose song “Stay with Me” hit number-one on the Billboard charts, received the most honors.

Better The Grammys appeared on network TV last night. A British performer named Sam Smith, whose song “Stay with Me” hit number-one on the Billboard charts, received the most honors. When they were first conceived in the late 50s, the Grammys were called the Grammophone Awards.

How can you avoid long sentences? Look at it. Does it look more like a paragraph than a sentence? Read it all at once out loud. If you feel breathless, it’s too long. Look at the number of “ands,” buts” and “becauses.” If you have more than one, consider breaking it up.

The run-on sentence

Incorrect: In the near future, I plan on opening a restaurant, I don’t know where it will be, but I’m excited. Correct: In the near future, I plan on opening a restaurant. I don’t know where it will be, but I’m excited. .

Incorrect: I want to improve my athletic skills, so that I can play in the World Cup, soccer is my passion, and I love it. Correct: I want to improve my athletic skills, so that I can play in the World Cup. Soccer is my passion, and I love it.

The incomplete sentence

Incorrect: Some days I love to get away from the city Incorrect: Some days I love to get away from the city. Go on long car rides and come home with stories to tell. Correct: Some days I love to get away from the city. I go on long car rides and come home with stories to tell. Correct: Some days I love to get away from the city and go on long car rides. I enjoy coming home with stories to tell.

Incorrect: I plan to intern at Power 105. 1 FM Incorrect: I plan to intern at Power 105.1 FM. Standing alongside some of my favorite radio personalities. Correct: I plan to intern at Power 105.1 FM, standing alongside some of my favorite radio personalities.

Too many unnecessary words. Simple = better. Think “lean, mean, clean Wordy  The issue of prejudice is confusing to me due to the fact that I am not cognizant of skin color. .

Prejudice confuses me, because I don’t notice skin color. Better! Prejudice confuses me, because I don’t notice skin color.

Wordy  I was made aware of the fact that my uncle died when I tuned into the television news.

Better! I turned on the news and found out my uncle had died.

Repetitiveness Incorrect Next I plan to work at a music management company, working with singers and dancers.

correct Next I plan to work at a music management company, working with singers and dancers.

Incorrect I love to cook and hope to find new and different ways of cooking the foods I enjoy.

Correct I love to cook and hope to find new and different ways of preparing the foods I love.

To repeat myself…don’t repeat yourself! In two years, I see myself with a great job. A year later, I see myself married with a child. I see myself quitting the job after the baby to start my own magazine.

How to avoid being repetitive: In journalism, you don’t need to “re-state the thesis” like in essay writing. Find different words. I love soccer and love baseball. I love soccer and enjoy playing baseball. Never say: Like I said before or As I mentioned previously or the “aforementioned….”

Incorrect and inconsistent CAPS; Use caps for proper names; none of these words, from your essays, need CAPS: high school, advertising political science, event planner, public relations, journalism, media, creative writing, grandfather, graduate school, newsroom, sociology, board of education, producer, director, master’s degree

Passive Voice--uck! Be active, not passive. Don’t let something be done by somebody or something.

Not: The textbook was read by me.

Better! I read the textbook.

not Once the plan is put into place, success can be achieved.

Better Once I put the plan into place, I can achieve success. [note: you must know who the subject is!]

Replace all forms of the “to be” verb with active or action verbs Get rid of: there is, are, were, was, has been, could be…..etc. Do this EVEN if you have to re-work the sentence. Just don’t change the meaning.

There are three things that I care about. Not  There are three things that I care about.

I care about three things. Better  I care about three things.

Not The next thing I want to accomplish is to graduate from college.

Better Next, I want to graduate from college.

Not  Professor Villarosa is my favorite instructor.

Better  I love Professor Villarosa—intensely. I adore Professor Villarosa. To me, Professor Villarosa rocks.

Not  The Patriots were the winners against the Seahawks.

Better  The Patriots beat the Seahawks. Poor Seahawks—the Patriots wiped the floor with them. New England creamed Seattle. The Patriots kicked some Seahawk tail! The Seahawks lost to the (far superior) Patriots.

checklist Use spell check! Make sure all names are correct. Unless you’re totally sure, look it up. Read everything over to check for careless errors or typos. Even better, read it over out loud. Get rid of any passive voice. Replace “to be” with active or action verbs.