Counseling

Introduction There are times that the challenges in our lives may lead to isolation, anxiety, depression, and other health problems. Through counseling, you can explore your alternatives, build on your strengths, and develop new skills. Your feelings and concerns about family, friends, health, and work deserve attention. Counseling gives you the opportunity, in a quiet, supportive environment, to take the time to stop, think, and plan. With sensitive and caring feedback, you can gain new awareness and learn to deal with your challenges in new, productive ways.

Objectives: By the end of this session, you will be able to: Identify counseling Identify the benefits of counseling Determine in what areas counseling can be beneficial Identify the important counseling technique tools Identity inappropriate responses in counseling

What is counseling? Counseling falls under the umbrella term ‘talking therapies’ and allows people to discuss their problems and any difficult feelings they encounter in a safe, confidential environment. The term can mean different things to different people, but in general it is a process people seek when they want to change something in their lives or simply explore their thoughts and feelings in more depth.

Benefits of Counseling Improved communication Enhanced relationships A happier family Peace of mind Improved self-esteem More satisfaction out of life Personal growth Improved job performance

Counseling may be helpful in any of the following areas: Adult relationships Career change Dealing with loss of a loved one Anxiety Depression Adjustment to family changes Parent-child relationships Sibling relationships Divorce Cooperative parenting between divorced parents Abusive relationships Learning Disabilities or Attention Deficit Disorder Trauma

Some Qualities of a Good Counselor Empathy (the ability to understand the view of another person) Respectful Warm Confidential/discreet Honest Attentive/listening Unbiased Understandable/clear Unhurried

Inappropriate Responses in Counseling Judging: For example, “You wouldn’t have these problems if you had acted differently!” Attacking: For example, “How could you be that irresponsible? Denial: For example, “Don’t worry. I’m sure that it’s nothing important.” Pity: For example, “Poor thing! How terrible that happened!”

Counseling Technique Tools There are several important tools in the counseling kit that will enable you to effectively communicate and counsel others: Asking questions Active Listening Encouraging Body Language Paraphrasing

Counseling Technique Tools Asking questions open and closed - is an important tool in the counseling kit. They can help a person open up or close them down. An open ended question (OEQ) is one that is used in order to gather lots of information – you ask it with the intent of getting a long answer. OEQ’s are great for: Starting the information gathering part of the session Keeping the client talking

Counseling Technique Tools – Asking Questions, continued Open-Ended Questions (OEQs) have no correct answer and require an explanation of sorts. Here are some good ones: What brought you in here today? Do you have an idea about why this keeps happening? How does that make you feel? You’ll notice that I didn’t use “why?” directly. This is because some people find it threatening and overwhelming. It implies judgment and it can be asking an unanswerable question.

Counseling Technique Tools – Asking Questions, continued A closed ended question (CEQ) is one used to gather specific information - it can normally be answered with either a single word or a short phrase. Good basic counsel skills to know! Closed Ended Questions (CEQ’s) are those that can easily be answered with a “yes” or a “no” or brief information. For example: What is your name and date of birth? Where do you work? Occupation? They sound a little harsh, but are needed for: 1. Getting necessary information 2. To get bring a chatty client back on track or interrupt her/him

Counseling Technique Tools Active listening Based on what you have learned in this course, can you describe how to be an active listener in a successful counseling session?

Counseling Technique Tools – Active Listening, continued So… 1. Before the session, make sure your physical needs are taken care of (thirst, hunger, bathroom, stretching). 2. Look at the speaker. Taking a few notes can keep you on task; mentally put masking tape across your mouth. 3. Watch your body language! 4. Encourage the speaker to continue with short, gentle comments like “uh-huh”, “really!?”, “tell me more”, etc. If the person is not normally talkative, you may have to refer to your brief one or two word notes and ask an open question.

Counseling Technique Tools Encouraging Body Language Remember that communication is 55% body language, 38% tone and 7% words.

Counseling Technique Tools – By the way, this is a good time to take interest in the tone of your voice. Be watchful of whether it is… High / low Loud / soft Fast / slow Accommodating / demanding Moderation in all things including voice. Remember, the person may not remember what was said, but they will remember how you made them feel.

Counseling Technique Tools Paraphrasing When you, the listener, restate succinctly and tentatively what the speaker said - conveying empathy, acceptance and genuineness. Since we cannot read our client’s mind and we’ve been given a lot of extraneous material, it’s good to learn how to rephrase briefly and acknowledge that this is what we think the client has said.