Buccaneers SAIL Safe Accountable In Control Lead by Example

Please take time today to talk about kind acts that you have witnessed… What kindnesses are happening at B-UMS that need to be recognized? Mrs. Cutright’s Club is posting our kind act count on the new banner that is on display by the snack bar. Check it out!

Personal freedom All growing teens are eventually going to want to increase their independence from adults so that they can make their own decisions. We are going to talk about how you can better manage your responsibilities while having independence to do what you like (within reason).

Managing Thoughts The first thing to know about having Personal Freedom is to realize how your thinking affects your choices. In order to get personal freedom you have to do something first. What is it? To have freedom you have to be able to follow rules and think about the behaviors that will cause people to trust you.

Following Rules Leads to Personal Freedom Personal Freedom means having the ability to do what you want to do (within reason) … because others trust you. To have freedom you have to be able to follow rules and think about the behaviors that will cause people to trust you. When some kids think they can get what they want by breaking rules, they fall into the Defiance Trap. The more they break the rules and choose unhelpful thoughts and behaviors, the less freedom they have. So how do you balance trust and personal freedom?

The Domino Effect (chain reactions) We can create a domino effect by making continual choices to behave in a certain way (positive or negative). When we make a choice to do something (activating event), other things usually happen as a result of that choice. Sometimes the thing that ends up happening is not something we want (end result). Look at the scenario on the next slide and pick out Joe’s Activating Event & End Result.

Meet Joe 1. Joe walks into class with a frown. He drops his binder on the floor. 3. Joe gives a dirty look and says, “What if I don’t?” 5. Joe says, “I don’t care”. 2. Teacher frowns and says, “Pick that up and put it on your desk.” 4. Teacher says, “You know the rules, do as I’ve asked”. 6. Joe spends the remainder of class in ISS.

Joe must chill! In order to stop the DOMINO EFFECT, you have to stop and think and make a helpful, appropriate choice. Look on the previous slide and decide at what points did Joe need to make a change in his thinking. (if he changes his thinking, then he can change his emotions) THOUGHTS + FEELINGS = ACTION! What could he have said to himself to change his thinking at those points. Joe fell into the DEFIANCE TRAP!

If you closely monitor how you think about life situations, you can make healthier choices and therefore, avoid the defiance trap. What are some challenges that students have in avoiding the defiance trap?