5 STEPS To Protecting Our Children Darkness To Light’s 5 STEPS To Protecting Our Children

5 Steps to Protecting Our Children Darkness To Light National nonprofit Purpose to empower adults Programs raise awareness Adult education re recognition, prevention, responsible reaction Child Sexual Abuse Any sexual act between adult & minor/ 2 minors with 1 having power Use of force/ persuasion with child Includes exhibition, pornography, voyeurism & sexual communication

Step 1 - Learn the Facts Estimated 1 in 10 sexually abused before 18th birthday Youth victims 66% of reported sexual offenses Youth 2.5 times more likely to be raped 40% of victims 11 or younger 9% of 10-17 year olds receive sexual requests through social media

The greatest danger to children comes from family & friends – Not from strangers

Child Sexual Abuse Facts 90% abused children know abuser 30% abused by relatives 60% abused by someone trusted 40% abused by older or larger children 10% abused by strangers

Child sexual abusers work hard at appearing trustworthy

CSA Consequences Post traumatic stress disorder Anxiety & depression Substance abuse Aggression, oppositionality & defiance Self-inflicted harm/suicide Delinquency Poor school performance/dropout Health problems Sexual Promiscuity & Teen Pregnancy Crime/violent offenses

Step 2 – Minimize Opportunity 80% CSA in isolated, one-on-one situations Check location for hidden areas Choose group situations/multiple adults Interactions – can be seen/interrupted No isolated/one-on-one older youth& younger children

Reduce the Risk. Ask for Best Practices - Background checks In-person interviews – new hires/volunteers Reference checks Policy re disclosures & discoveries Code of conduct Policy re inappropriate behavior, policy breaches, abuse suspicions Prevention training

One-on-One Precautions Drop in unexpectedly. Ensure outings can be observed. Talk with the child afterward. Let adults caring for children you have been educated re child sexual abuse.

Step 3 -Talk About It 1. Threats Open conversations with children/youth re sex, their bodies, boundaries Understand why children are afraid to “tell” 1. Threats 2. Confusion re right/wrong 3. Abuse called “game” 4. Shame/blame 5. Too young to understand Children are frequently afraid to tell adults they’ve been sexually abuse due to being shamed by the abuser who says it is the child’s fault, parents will be angry; they manipulate & confuse the child re right & wrong; sometimes an abuser may threaten the child or family; some children are too young to understand what is happening

Good Communication = Decrease in Vulnerabiltiy One of the best protections is our relationship with children Inform children about their bodies, what abuse is, correct terms for anatomy, age-appropriate sex info Teach children how to take care of their bodies & model this yourself Impress upon children that secrets should not be kept from adults Teach children what is appropriate & what is not re others & touch Make sure they understand it is ok to tell anyone “No” to unwanted/ uncomfortable physical contact Teach children not to give out personal info on the internet Listen calmly

Step 4 – Recognize the Signs Often no physical signs of sexual abuse but need professional attention if observed: Bruising, bleeding Urinary tract infections STD’s Discharge Chronic stomach pain, headaches not explained medically Emotional & behavioral signs are more common: Withdrawal/depression Anger, defiance Agitation/inability to concentrate Fear of situations/people Inappropriate sexual behavior/language for age Falling grades Alcohol/drug use, especially at young age

Step 5 – React Responsibly Find out where to go , whom to call & how to respond in the event a child discloses sexual abuse to you.

Responding to Risky Behaviors & Suspicions & Abuse Reports Reasons to React to Sexual Abuse: Child discloses abuse Adult discovers abuse Adult has reason to suspect abuse Educators are mandated reporters in S.C. Few reported incidents are false.

When a Child Discloses Offer Support : Affirm belief in child’s disclosure & you are there to help Express thanks for sharing; compliment courage to tell Stress the abuse is not the child’s fault Do not probe for details or “investigate” Make report to DSS following district protocol

Act on Suspicions Trust yourself Do not make assumptions Always think of the child’s safety before embarrassment of an adult Remember it is illegal not to report; it is part of your professional, ethical, moral responsibility