January - February 2019, Issue 7 LENGTHENING ATTENTION SPAN “Behavior isn't something someone "has." Rather, it emerges from the interaction of a person's biology, past experiences, and immediate context” - L. Todd Rose January - February 2019, Issue 7 Hyperactivity, Interruptions & Demands HYPERACTIVITY Hyperactive children and their parents are often in conflict. It is important to remember not to scold, but to take effective action. HYERACTIVE OR HYPERKINECTIC? The first distinction to be made is whether a child is hyperactive or hyperkinetic. The child who is hyperactive has what appears to be a chemical deficiency in the brain which won’t allow him/her to function normally. The hyperkinetic child, on the other hand, has the appropriate level of chemicals. This child is overly active because he/she has either never learned appropriate behavior, has actually been encouraged to be overly active, or is highly anxious. Professionals use special techniques to distinguish between children who are hyperactive and children who are hyperkinetic. As a parent, you may be able to make the distinction by asking yourself if there are any conditions or times when your child can remain still for 15 minutes. The hyperactive child has total inability to sit still. The hyperkinetic child can, at times, be quiet and sit still. This 15-minute suggestion is only a guideline. Upcoming Dates: January 25th: Spirit Day January 28th: Cupid Gram Sales January 30th & 31st: Pastries with Parents February 4th: Math-a-Thon February 4-8th: National School Counseling Week Contact Us: Shelli M Bond, M.S., LPSC, NCC sbond@bartlettschools.org Janet Reese jreese@bartlettschools.org 901-373-2600 Ext. 3012 ACTIVITY LEVEL A second area that needs to be addressed in the child’s activity level. It is important that parents model a calm activity level. This can be difficult, as these children can cause parents to become hyper themselves. If you feel this happening to you, remove yourself from the situation until you calm down and feel under control. Remember… Teach children appropriate behavior; don’t just criticize. A truly hyperactive child may need an evaluation by a pediatrician or child psychologist. LENGTHENING ATTENTION SPAN One of the main goals for a child who is either hyperactive or hyperkinetic is developing a longer attention span. Parents must start at the child’s level, and gradually work to have the child pay attention for longer and longer periods of time. This can frequently be done by giving the child attention as long as he/she attends to the task at hand. Playing a game by saying, “I’ll bet you can’t keep coloring until lunchtime,” or “I’ll bet you can’t keep your eyes on the book and read until the alarm goes off.” These are the type of statements that motivate a child to make an extra effort. SOCIAL SKILLS Another area in which these children need training is in getting along with people. Provide the child with opportunities in which he/she can get along with others. Make suggestions about how to win friends. Invite only one child at a time to play for a specified time period. Supervise the children from a distance. Provide a snack during the close of playtime. Discuss the playtime with the child, praising his/her positive interactions with the other child. If any problems occurred, have the child suggest other ways he/she could have handled the situation.

Do not give in to demands – ignore them Did you know? Many Children attempt to get attention by constantly interrupting parents, other adults, or other children. Sometimes they do this by asking questions or making some type of physical gesture, such as pulling on clothing or your hand. When children interrupt, they are almost always attempting to get attention. This usually gets reinforced when the parent tells the child to stop or responds to the interruption by answering the question. When parents do this, it teaches children interrupting is acceptable. To stop interruptions, parents must ignore the behavior. If clothes are being pulled, ignore the action and walk away. If questions are being asked, develop a “deaf ear.” Treat interruptions as if they didn’t exist. When handled this way, the behavior usually doesn’t last very long. When the child does not get the desired attention, the behavior doesn’t not get reinforced. Remember…Interruptions are designed to get you frazzled. Ignore, Ignore Ignore! DEMANDS Children are very clever at finding ways to demand attention. They may ask several questions or continually ask for one thing or another. They might act in more subtle ways by forgetting their lunch money, schoolbooks, homework, etc. There are any number of ways in which children make demands on a parent’s time and attention. “NO” MEANS “NO” Human nature is such that the squeaky wheel usually gets the grease. Children are squeaky wheels when they badger parents until they give in just so they can have peace and quiet. Unfortunately, this only reinforces negative behavior. Children must learn that no means just that. Parents should decide the first time they hear a request whether or not to grant it. If the decision in not to grant the child’s request, then no amount of badgering or begging should cause the parent to change his/her mind. Giving in to demands teaches the children to be demanding. BAILING CHILDREN OUT When children forget something and parents bail them out, children learn it is not important for them to remember things. The frantic telephone call that lunch money, a library book, or gym clothes are at home often brings a parent running to school. When children demand and get attention from parents in this fashion, it is time to apply natural consequences. Natural consequences state that if children are irresponsible, parents do not bail them out. In other words, forgetting to take lunch money, gym clothes or library books to school results in the child accepting the consequences set up by the school for these failures. Not rescuing children is difficult for many parents, because they want their children to be successful. What they fail to see is that in order for children to be successful, they must also be responsible. Remember… Do not give in to demands – ignore them The more you talk to your child the less likely it is that the demands will stop.