GIVING FEEDBACK

Talk in Terms of Behavior, NOT People It is more helpful to say “the organization was not very clear,” or “the Gestures just didn’t seem to emphasize any point” THAN to say “you weren’t very good” It is much easier for a person to accept feedback when it is about his/her behavior than when it labels the person. React to the act, not to the person.

Talk in Terms that Describe, not Evaluate Description is the least painful and most helpful feedback to give and receive. Many people are much more willing to change if they can look at their own behavior and decide for themselves that it is not satisfactory. Often they will reject feedback that says their behavior is unsatisfactory. Describe, don’t judge.

Talk in Terms of the Present Situation When giving feedback talk only in terms of what may be upsetting you at the moment, not what has upset you before. Giving feedback is very important. Without it, the other person can only guess at the problem by reading nonverbal messages. React to the present, not the past.

Know Your Own Nonverbal Feedback Messages Being aware of your nonverbal feedback behaviors is desirable in order to avoid unintentionally sending negative messages to receivers. Know your nonverbal self.

Time the Feedback Carefully As a communicator, you have to be sensitive to the timing of your feedback. The other person may not be able to accept your comments because there are many other things on his/her mind. Be sensitive in your timing.

Send “I” Messages The speaker must take responsibility for his/her reactions to the situation and let the receiver know exactly how he/she feels. “O.K. you’re right,” or “I think you’re confused” are example of “I” messages. Take responsibility for your feelings and opinions. Send “I” messages.