Stand Strong  Stay Safe Lesson 4 Stopping Abuse

Safe Relationship Tools Emotional Control Stop, Breathe, Think Stress Management Strategies Challenges Act Impulsively Escalation Safe Relationship Tools Assertiveness Integrity Review

Conflict or Violence? CONFLICT Disagreement, argument, or unintentional boundary crossing. Conflict is a normal part of every relationship. VIOLENCE Aggression, intentionally causing harm, or threatening to cause harm. Violence is not a part of safe relationships.

When someone with MORE POWER Abuse Is… When someone with MORE POWER Intentionally In order to control or hurt you Crosses your boundaries Abuse is when someone with MORE POWER than you Crosses your boundaries ON PURPOSE with the INTENT TO CONTROL OR HURT YOU

Abuse is NEVER the victim’s fault.

Types of Abuse Physical Abuse Emotional Abuse Sexual Abuse Crossing physical boundaries leaving bruises, cuts, burns, or other marks on your body Physical Abuse Crossing emotional boundaries making you feel worthless, unwanted, belittled, ashamed Emotional Abuse Crossing sexual boundaries Sexual Abuse Who sets boundaries? You get to decide what your boundaries are in most cases; but there are some rules set by law. What are physical boundaries? What are emotional boundaries? What are sexual boundaries? – covered on next slide. Click. What about bullying?

Sexual Boundaries No one may look at or touch the private parts of your body unless you need help and it is not a secret. No one is allowed to take pictures or videos of the private parts of your body, nor show you pictures or videos of other people’s private parts. No one is allowed to show you their private parts or ask to see the private parts of your body. The private parts of your body belong to you. You decide who touches you, where they touch you, how they touch you, and when they touch you. Secrets about abuse are never safe. Review from Early childhood AND early elementary. Students should be pretty familiar with this. Add bathing suit image to this slide. PRIVATE PARTS are the parts of the body that are usually covered by a bathing suit when we go swimming. Anytime someone breaks these rules or crosses your sexual boundaries, get out of the situation as quickly and as safely as you can and tell an adult you trust.

When someone with MORE POWER What About Bullying? In order to control or hurt you When someone with MORE POWER Intentionally Crosses your boundaries

Bullying IS Abuse Because: Crosses your boundaries When someone with MORE POWER  There is always a power imbalance between a person who bullies and a person who is bullied. Bullying involves intentionally crossing boundaries.   Intentionally In order to control or hurt you 3-4. The person who bullies intentionally tries to hurt or control the person who is bullied.  Bullying can involve an ongoing pattern of behavior or a single hurtful event.

What Do You Do If You Experience Abuse? Know and respect your boundaries Be Assertive: stand up for yourself and defend your boundaries, if it’s safe Get Out of the situation as quickly as possible Tell A Trusted Adult, and keep telling until you get the help you need Abuse is NEVER the victim’s fault.

Activity - Recognizing Abuse Your friend tells you about the situation described on the Scenario Card. Answer the questions on the Think Sheet to help you decide what to do or what advice to give. What boundaries are being crossed? Is it conflict or violence? How do you know? Is there a balance of power? If not, who has more power? What kind of power do they have? Is this abuse? How do you know? What do you tell your friend? What action do you take? For reference, as students work through the scenarios and Think Sheets in pairs and small groups. Once students have had about 5 minutes to work together, bring them back together to report their scenarios for the benefit of the whole class.

Thank you for Standing Strong to Stay Safe!