Bully-Proofing: A Conversation Carlos Carmona, School Psychologist

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Opening Activity Seat together as a School Distribute a sheet a paper per person Write: One hobby or interest that I like to do outside of school Group yourselves in groups of 8 Each group collects the papers, mixes them up, and distributes random As a small group, try to guess the person, and discuss

Percentages of Bullies, Victims, & Bystanders

My Preggie Pop Story

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Bullying Intentional and Deliberate Physical or Emotional Harm Intentional and Deliberate Creates a hostile environment Imbalance of Power Behavior is Usually Repeated over time

Imbalance of Power occurs when A Student is Bigger or Older A student has more social status or more popular A group of students gang up on another student

4 Types of Bullying/Harassment Sending nasty text messages, posting nasty and rude comments, to ridicule someone, spreading rumors through social networks Excluding someone, spreading rumors to hurt someone’s reputation, humiliating someone in public Teasing, name calling, gossip, demeaning jokes, Pushing, hitting, shoving, kicking, hair pulling, damaging other’s property Physical Verbal Cyber Emotional

About Bullying/Harassment Physical bullying is the easiest to recognize. Verbal bullying is common because it is quick, direct and easy to do. Emotional bullying is calculated and mostly done in groups. It makes people feel really bad inside. Cyber bullying has become more common because the bully can torment someone through social media websites and texting. Often times the bully can remain anonymous while taunting the victim.

Normal Peer Conflict Unkind words that occur once Rough play that is not intended to cause harm to another person. An argument between people who cannot agree on an issue An act of aggression towards another

Conflict vs. Bullying Normal Peer Conflict Bullying Equal Power Happens occasionally Not seeking power, attention or trying to gain something. Remorse—will take responsibility Willing to resolve the problem Imbalance of Power Usually Repeated negative action Seeking power, control or material things No remorse—blames victim No effort to resolve problem

Ways to Resolve a Conflict Don’t gossip about the situation. Speak privately with the other student. Request mediation through your counselor if needed. Express your concern without blame. Use “I-messages to express your feelings.” Accept responsibility for your role. Listen to the other person’s point of view. Come up with ways to make the situation better.