Pre-Class Discussion Questions What was your most significant single take-away from the lesson last week on Expectations and Family/In-Laws? Why is Sexual Intimacy a big deal to God?

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Sexual Intimacy

Sexual Intimacy

On Average, Couples Have Sex: 6 Times per Month 45 Minutes per Session

Which means sex makes up 0.625% Of your married life

1. We Tend to view sex as either: Sex is god Sex is gross Sex is a gift

The Body is Good So God created man in his own image, in the image of God he created him; male and female he created them… And God saw everything that he had made, and behold, it was very good. And there was evening and there was morning, the sixth day. Genesis 1:27, 31 For you formed my inward parts; you knitted me together in my mother’s womb. I praise you, for I am fearfully and wonderfully made. Psalm 139:13-14a

Sex is Good And God blessed them. And God said to them, “Be fruitful and multiply and fill the earth and subdue it, and have dominion over the fish of the sea and over the birds of the heavens and over every living thing that moves on the earth.” Genesis 1:28 Eat, friends, drink, and be drunk with love! Song of Solomon 5:1b

Sex is an Opportunity to Glorify God So, whether you eat or drink, whatever you do, do all to the glory of God. 1 Corinthians 10:31

Sex is designed for marriage. But because of the temptation to sexual immorality, each man should have his own wife and each woman her own husband… But if they cannot exercise self-control, they should marry. For it is better to marry than to burn with passion. 1 Corinthians 7:2, 9 Let marriage be held in honor among all, and let the marriage bed be undefiled, for God will judge the sexual immoral and adulterous. Hebrews 13:4

Purity & Cohabitation Flee from sexual immorality. Every other sin a person commits is outside the body, but the sexually immoral person sins against his own body. 1 Corinthians 6:18 But sexual immorality and all impurity or covetousness must not even be named among you, as is proper among saints. Ephesians 5:3

Purity & Cohabitation For this is the will of God, your sanctification: that you abstain from sexual immorality; that each one of you know how to control his own body in holiness and honor, not in the passion of lust like the Gentiles who do not know God; that no one transgress and wrong his brother in this matter, because the Lord is an avenger in all these things, as we told you beforehand and solemnly warned you. For God has not called us for impurity, but in holiness. Therefore whoever disregards this, disregards not man but God, who gives his Holy Spirit to you. 1 Thessalonians 4:3-8 Therefore a man shall leave his father and mother and hold fast to his wife, and they shall become one flesh. Genesis 2:24

II. Starting Right Wedding Night & Honeymoon Talk about your wedding night and honeymoon expectations

II. Starting Right Wedding Night & Honeymoon Take the long term view and seek to serve your spouse.

III. What is Permissible? Sex cannot: Involve others (Matthew 5:27) Can’t hurt the other (Philippians 2:3- 4) Can’t violate someone’s conscience (Romans 14)

Stripper Pole

What’s in Bounds Biblically?

What’s in Bounds Biblically?

What’s in Bounds Biblically?

What’s in Bounds Biblically?

IV. Growing in Intimacy Communicate your desires to your spouse The best sex is in the best marriages Focus on more than the climax

From When Two Become One, by Christopher McCluskey

IV. Growing in Intimacy Have eyes only for your spouse. Focus more on your spouse’s desires than your own Work through your past. Make sure you talk through your sexual history with your significant other

What Women Wish Their Husbands Understood About Sex Be tender, patient and slow Everything is connected for a woman Touch & compliments are great when they don’t always lead to sex Women like to have fun too... Be Creative!

What Women Wish Their Husbands Understood About Sex Remember sex is sacred - be careful of slang, crudeness, etc… Take care of your body and work to look good for her Don’t EVER compare her body to someone else’s or sex with her to sex with someone else Pornography is completely out of bounds

What Men Wish Their Wives Understood About Sex Men love it when their wives initiate sexually There is no greater ego boost for a man than for him to satisfy his wife sexually, so help him understand how Know your body and what feels good Be present & engaged; don’t just simply show up and do your duty. Most guys love oral sex (if you are comfortable with it)

What Men Wish Their Wives Understood About Sex Don’t ever use sex as a bargaining chip Lack of availability is hurtful to a man Men are visual. Partner with him in his purity. Help him but don’t freak out Dealing with past hurts or negative attitudes is a great gift to give to a husband You can still have sex when you are pregnant.