The Nature & Necessity of Marriage. When God created Adam and Eve, He made each one to be unique. When God created Adam and Eve, He made each one to be.

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Presentation transcript:

The Nature & Necessity of Marriage. When God created Adam and Eve, He made each one to be unique. When God created Adam and Eve, He made each one to be unique. They differed physiologically, psychologically, & personally. They differed physiologically, psychologically, & personally. The evidence remains today: The evidence remains today: Men and women think and act differently. Men and women think and act differently. They approach problems with differing perspectives. They approach problems with differing perspectives. Wives and husbands have different expectations for the marriage relationship. Wives and husbands have different expectations for the marriage relationship.

Differences: Things Women Want from Men A list compiled by Cherly Lavin and published in the Chicago Tribune. A list compiled by Cherly Lavin and published in the Chicago Tribune. A list of 7 (there were over 70 in all). A list of 7 (there were over 70 in all). 1. If you ask us whats wrong and we say nothing, ask us again. And this time, look sincere. 1. If you ask us whats wrong and we say nothing, ask us again. And this time, look sincere. 2. When we say something, its necessary for you to respond. At the very minimum, nod your head. 2. When we say something, its necessary for you to respond. At the very minimum, nod your head. 3. Buy yourself some decent clothes. 3. Buy yourself some decent clothes.

Differences: Things Women Want from Men 4. We are self-conscious by nature; we cant help it. 4. We are self-conscious by nature; we cant help it. 5. Real men run dishwashers and dust. 5. Real men run dishwashers and dust. 6. When no ones home, stand in front of the mirror and practice this until you can say it in public, I was wrong. 6. When no ones home, stand in front of the mirror and practice this until you can say it in public, I was wrong. 7. After you have mastered that, work on, Im sorry. 7. After you have mastered that, work on, Im sorry. EX: 5 words that make a marriage. EX: 5 words that make a marriage.

Differences: Mens Rules for Women A list compiled by Cherly Lavin and published in the Chicago Tribune. A list compiled by Cherly Lavin and published in the Chicago Tribune. A list of 7 (there were a little less than 40 in all). A list of 7 (there were a little less than 40 in all). 1. When we have to go somewhere, absolutely anything you wear is fine. Really. 1. When we have to go somewhere, absolutely anything you wear is fine. Really. 2. Ask for what you want. Let's be clear on this one: Subtle hints don't work. Strong hints don't work. Really obvious hints don't work. Just say it! 2. Ask for what you want. Let's be clear on this one: Subtle hints don't work. Strong hints don't work. Really obvious hints don't work. Just say it!

Differences: Mens Rules for Women 3. Yes and no are perfectly acceptable answers to almost every question. 3. Yes and no are perfectly acceptable answers to almost every question. 4. No, we don't know what day it is. We never will. Mark anniversaries on a calendar you know we check. 4. No, we don't know what day it is. We never will. Mark anniversaries on a calendar you know we check. 5. Anything we said six months ago is inadmissible in an argument. All comments become null and void after seven days. 5. Anything we said six months ago is inadmissible in an argument. All comments become null and void after seven days. 6. Christopher Columbus didn't need directions, and neither do we. 6. Christopher Columbus didn't need directions, and neither do we.

Differences: Mens Rules for Women 7. If something we said can be interpreted two ways, and one of the ways makes you sad or angry, we meant the other one. 7. If something we said can be interpreted two ways, and one of the ways makes you sad or angry, we meant the other one. Marriage is based in part on an ability to communicate. Marriage is based in part on an ability to communicate. There will be misunderstandings. There will be misunderstandings. You must choose to work through them to make your marriage stronger. You must choose to work through them to make your marriage stronger. Today, we will look at Genesis 2:24-25 to gain more insights on marriage. Today, we will look at Genesis 2:24-25 to gain more insights on marriage.

Genesis 2:21-25 (Page 2) 21 So the LORD God caused the man to fall into a deep sleep; and while he was sleeping, he took one of the mans ribs and closed up the place with flesh. 22 Then the LORD God made a woman from the rib he had taken out of the man, and he brought her to the man. 21 So the LORD God caused the man to fall into a deep sleep; and while he was sleeping, he took one of the mans ribs and closed up the place with flesh. 22 Then the LORD God made a woman from the rib he had taken out of the man, and he brought her to the man. 23 The man said, This is now bone of my bones and flesh of my flesh; 23 The man said, This is now bone of my bones and flesh of my flesh;

Genesis 2:21-25 she shall be called woman, for she was taken out of man. she shall be called woman, for she was taken out of man. 24 For this reason a man will leave his father and mother and be united to his wife, and they will become one flesh. 24 For this reason a man will leave his father and mother and be united to his wife, and they will become one flesh. 25 The man and his wife were both naked, and they felt no shame. 25 The man and his wife were both naked, and they felt no shame. The New International Version, (Grand Rapids, MI: Zondervan Publishing House) The New International Version, (Grand Rapids, MI: Zondervan Publishing House) 1984.

The Nature & Necessities for a Strong Marriage: 1. Leaving – Built Around Mutual Sacrifice (Vs. 24a) 1. Leaving – Built Around Mutual Sacrifice (Vs. 24a) 2. Cleaving – Built Around Mutual Commitment (Vs. 24b) 2. Cleaving – Built Around Mutual Commitment (Vs. 24b) 3. Becoming One – Built Around Mutual Need (Vv. 24c-25) 3. Becoming One – Built Around Mutual Need (Vv. 24c-25)

The Nature of Marriage: Monogamous: - One man and one woman. - NOT polygamy. Between a man and a woman. - Adam & Eve... - Not Adam and Steve. - Not Eve and Eva. A man (Ish) leaves & cleaves to his wife (Ishah)

The Necessities of Marriage: 1. It Requires Leaving (Vs. 24a) 1. It Requires Leaving (Vs. 24a) to leave, forsake, abandon, leave behind, let go. Vine's Expository Dictionary of Old and New Testament Words Leave = awzab – to leave, forsake, abandon, leave behind, let go. Vine's Expository Dictionary of Old and New Testament Words But what must they leave behind? But what must they leave behind? I believe there are at least two areas: I believe there are at least two areas: A. They must leave the home in which they grew up. A. They must leave the home in which they grew up. You do not abandon your parents but the relationship with them changes. You do not abandon your parents but the relationship with them changes.

Leaving... EX: Father Refuses His Daughter EX: Father Refuses His Daughter Leaving is not easy, but if either the man or the woman fail to leave, it will hamper and hurt the marriage. Leaving is not easy, but if either the man or the woman fail to leave, it will hamper and hurt the marriage. I have encountered instances where the husband has not left the home where he grew up. I have encountered instances where the husband has not left the home where he grew up. I have encountered the same in wives who have not left their parents home. I have encountered the same in wives who have not left their parents home. Both man and woman must be willing to sacrifice for the sake of the marriage. Both man and woman must be willing to sacrifice for the sake of the marriage.

Leaving... A. They must leave the home in which they grew up. A. They must leave the home in which they grew up. B. They must leave their life of singleness behind. B. They must leave their life of singleness behind. EX: Unity Candle EX: Unity Candle It is not two individuals who happen to be living together. It is not two individuals who happen to be living together. Instead, it is a couple that are in the ongoing process of becoming one. Instead, it is a couple that are in the ongoing process of becoming one. In your home, are you a couple or two individuals in constant competition? In your home, are you a couple or two individuals in constant competition?

The Necessities of Marriage: Requires LEAVING: Requires LEAVING: You must leave so you can CLEAVE. You must leave so you can CLEAVE. Example of gymnast: Example of gymnast: You must let go SO you can catch the next bar. You must let go SO you can catch the next bar.

Cleaving... Cleave = dawbak - Enhanced Strongs Lexicon, (Oak Harbor, WA: Logos Research Systems, Inc.) Cleave = dawbak - to cling, stick, stay close, cleave, keep close, stick to, stick with, follow closely, join to, overtake, catch Enhanced Strongs Lexicon, (Oak Harbor, WA: Logos Research Systems, Inc.) Exemplified in the movie, Fireproof, by the supergluing of a salt & pepper shaker together. Exemplified in the movie, Fireproof, by the supergluing of a salt & pepper shaker together. To pry them apart would not be easy. To pry them apart would not be easy. To pry them apart would also destroy one or both of them. To pry them apart would also destroy one or both of them.

Cleaving... Cleaving requires commitment. Cleaving requires commitment. Cleaving demands that you work on your relationship to make sure you continue to have things in common to unite you. Cleaving demands that you work on your relationship to make sure you continue to have things in common to unite you. EX: Marriage needs common ground. EX: Marriage needs common ground. What are you doing as a couple to build your marriage? What are you doing as a couple to build your marriage? Do you minister together? Do you minister together? Do you continue to date one another? Do you continue to date one another? OR, are you drifting apart? OR, are you drifting apart?

Commitment... Results in BECOMING ONE: Results in BECOMING ONE: A Life-long process! Mentioned as a future state, the two shall become one. Repeated in the New Testament as something for which to strive: Matthew 19:5 Mark 10:8 1 Corinthians 6:16 Ephesians 5:31

Becoming One... Some of the greatest examples of oneness are evidenced in the lives of couples who have been married many, many years. Some of the greatest examples of oneness are evidenced in the lives of couples who have been married many, many years. EX: Couple celebrates 50 th Anniversary. EX: Couple celebrates 50 th Anniversary. Maybe that wasnt the best example, but here is one that is... Maybe that wasnt the best example, but here is one that is... EX: The Memory of Love. EX: The Memory of Love. Will your marriage last? Will your marriage last? Are you overcoming or feeling overrun? Are you overcoming or feeling overrun?

For a Marriage to Work: Seek to be a completer... not a competitor. Seek to be a completer... not a competitor. Strive to be committed... not discontented. Strive to be committed... not discontented. Search for companionship... not conflict. Search for companionship... not conflict. Marriages are built around mutual sacrifice. Marriages are built around mutual sacrifice. Marriages are built around mutual commitment. Marriages are built around mutual commitment.

A life-long commitment: Marriages are built around mutual need. Marriages are built around mutual need. Two are better than one. Two are better than one. A cord of three is not quickly broken. A cord of three is not quickly broken. The third strand of a Christian marriage is God. The third strand of a Christian marriage is God. Perhaps our problem is that we have foggy ideas on what exactly is love? Perhaps our problem is that we have foggy ideas on what exactly is love? Video: Interview with cupid. Video: Interview with cupid.