B ULLYING A S WE GROW UP WE REALIZE IT IS LESS IMPORTANT TO HAVE LOTS OF FRIENDS AND MORE IMPORTANT TO HAVE REAL ONES.

 BOYS (1:37) tBack  GIRLS (2:19)

Bullying: To influence others through force or threat of force.  Nearly one-third of American teens are involved in bullying. In a recent study, 13% of teens admit to bullying, 11% admit to being bullied and 6% have been bullied and also bully others.  Bullying is a form of intimidation that may be verbal, nonverbal or physical. *

E XAMPLES OF VERBAL BULLYING :  Threaten someone  Force someone to do or not to do something  Tease maliciously  Dare a person to do or not to do something  Put someone down  Try to influence what others think about another person or group  Spreading rumors  Make fun of someone’s physical size, appearance or ability  Dictate what others will do or even wear*

E XAMPLES OF N ONVERBAL B ULLYING :  Ignoring or excluding someone from a group or an activity  Using nonverbal put-downs (with body language) *

E XAMPLES OF P HYSICAL B ULLYING :  Stealing or destroying property  Pushing/fighting or hurting someone  Surrounding a person with a group  Cornering a person in a hallway or classroom  Intentionally bumping into someone*

P OSSIBLE FEELINGS OF PEOPLE WHO INTIMIDATE OR BULLY OTHERS :  Insecure and unsure about how to relate to others  Frustrated by failed relationships  Lonely and angry  Fearful that others will hurt them so they hurt others first  Desire or need to feel important  Desire or need to feel in control  Low self confidence*

P OSSIBLE FEELINGS OF PEOPLE WHO ARE BEING INTIMIDATED OR BULLIED :  Fearful and scared  Angry and frustrated  Sad and lonely  Resentful of others who are not standing up for them  Revengeful  Embarrassed  Low self-esteem and confidence*

P OSSIBLE FEELINGS OF OBSERVERS OR BULLYING BYSTANDERS :  Worried that it could happen to them  Angry at themselves for not standing up for others  Glad the bullying is not directed at them  Embarrassed that they are standing by  They may feel guilt  Compassionate*

T HERE ARE THINGS YOU CAN DO TO DEFLECT PEOPLE WHO BULLY :  Walk away if you can  Stay confident. If a person who bullies feels that they don't have any power over you, it takes the 'fun' out of it for them.  Stay positive. It can be hard to remember all your good points when someone is doing their best to be negative.  Hang around with friends or an adult at times when you're most in danger of being bullied.  Don't fight back. It can make the situation worse.  Tell someone you trust, a teacher or adult.*

B ULLYING B YSTANDERS  Bullying situations usually involve more than the bully and the victim. They also involve bystanders—those who watch bullying happen or hear about it.  An important new strategy for bullying prevention focuses on the powerful role of the bystander. Depending on how bystanders respond, they can either contribute to the problem or the solution. Bystanders rarely play a completely neutral role, although they may think they do.*

H URTFUL B YSTANDERS  Some bystanders... instigate the bullying by prodding the bully to begin.  Other bystanders... encourage the bullying by laughing, cheering, or making comments that further stimulate the bully.  And other bystanders... join in the bullying once it has begun.  Most bystanders... passively accept bullying by watching and doing nothing. Often without realizing it, these bystanders also contribute to the problem. Passive bystanders provide the audience a bully craves and the silent acceptance that allows bullies to continue their hurtful behavior. *

H ELPFUL B YSTANDERS  Bystanders also have the power to play a key role in preventing or stopping bullying.  Some bystanders... directly intervene, by discouraging the bully, defending the victim, or redirecting the situation away from bullying.  Other bystanders... get help, by rallying support from peers to stand up against bullying or by reporting the bullying to adults. *

W HY DON ’ T MORE BYSTANDERS INTERVENE ?  They think, “It’s none of my business.”  They fear getting hurt or becoming another victim.  They feel powerless to stop the bully.  They don’t like the victim or believe the victim “deserves” it.  They don’t want to draw attention to themselves.  They fear retribution.  They think that telling adults won’t help or it may make things worse.  They don’t know what to do.*

C YBERBULLYING  Refers to any incident in which a person is tormented, embarrassed, harassed or threatened by another person through the use of technology ---- whether by internet, instant message, text message, digital photo, interactive gaming forum or other interactive technologies.  33% of young people have been cyberbullied  50% of students say cyberbullying is worse than real-life bullying  Girls are significantly more likely to be cyberbullied than boys*

T AKING A STAND AGAINST CYBERBULLYING  Refuse to pass along messages you receive.  Refuse to view or contribute to cruel websites, polls or comments.  Tell an adult*

C LIQUES AND F RIENDSHIP G ROUPS  A clique is a group of friends that leave other kids out on purpose.  One or two kids who have been deemed ‘popular’ usually run a clique.  A friendship group is not a clique but a group of peers that have developed a friendship out of shared interests, sports, activities, classes, neighborhoods or even family connections.  A friendship group does not leave others out on purpose. *

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