Writing Style Rules The Institute for Quality Public Services 2013

Practicing Good Style Definitions Definitions Verb: a word that expresses action or links the subject to information in the sentence. Verbs can change tense. Verb: a word that expresses action or links the subject to information in the sentence. Verbs can change tense. Example: I ski. Example: I ski. Example: He is happy. Example: He is happy. Example: The staff asks to go home. Example: The staff asks to go home. Example: The staff asked to go home. Example: The staff asked to go home. Example: The staff will ask to go home. Example: The staff will ask to go home.

Practicing Good Style Definitions Definitions Subject: a word that performs the action or is linked to information in the sentence. Subject: a word that performs the action or is linked to information in the sentence. Example: ski. Example: I ski. Example: He is happy. Example: He is happy. Example: The staff asks to go home. Example: The staff asks to go home. Example: The staff asked to go home. Example: The staff asked to go home. Example: The staff will ask to go home. Example: The staff will ask to go home.

Practicing Good Style Definitions Definitions Infinitive: to + a word that sometimes works as a verb; infinitives never act as verbs. Infinitive: to + a word that sometimes works as a verb; infinitives never act as verbs. Example: like to ski. Example: I like to ski. Example: We will have to replace the equipment next year. Example: We will have to replace the equipment next year. Example: The staff asks to go home. Example: The staff asks to go home.

Practicing Good Style Definitions Definitions Action Verbs: Express action (talk, think, state, etc.) Action Verbs: Express action (talk, think, state, etc.) Helping Verbs: Help other verbs act as verbs (is, am, was, were, will, may, etc.) Helping Verbs: Help other verbs act as verbs (is, am, was, were, will, may, etc.) Linking Verbs: Link the subject to information (is, am, was, were, etc.) Linking Verbs: Link the subject to information (is, am, was, were, etc.)

Practicing Good Style Yes, some words can be more than one type of verb. You must look at how they function in a sentence. Example of “is” as a helper verb: Example of “is” as a helper verb: He is helping me with the dishes. He is helping me with the dishes. Example of “is” as a linking verb: Example of “is” as a linking verb: He is shy. He is shy.

Practicing Good Style Definitions Definitions Present Participle: a verb form ending in –ing. In order for a present participle to work as a verb, it must have a helper in front of it. Without that helper, it may act as an adjective or noun. Present Participle: a verb form ending in –ing. In order for a present participle to work as a verb, it must have a helper in front of it. Without that helper, it may act as an adjective or noun. Example: am researching the issue. (verb) Example: I am researching the issue. (verb) Example: Researching the issue, Joesephine discovered another option. (part of an adjective phrase) Example: Researching the issue, Joesephine discovered another option. (part of an adjective phrase) Example: Researching takes up a lot of my time. (noun and subject of sentence) Example: Researching takes up a lot of my time. (noun and subject of sentence)

Practicing Good Style Definitions Definitions Prepositional Phrase: a group of words made of a preposition and its object (and any words that might come between the preposition and its object) Prepositional Phrase: a group of words made of a preposition and its object (and any words that might come between the preposition and its object) Example: He went to the job site. Example: He went to the job site. Example: The report was filed in Example: The report was filed in Example: The problem was identified by Stan Jacobs from Quality Control. Example: The problem was identified by Stan Jacobs from Quality Control. * You will not find the subject or verb in the prepositional phrase.

Practicing Good Style Definitions Definitions Passive Voice Passive Voice In the passive voice, you will be missing a strong subject. The word that should be the subject and should be performing the action will be missing, or it might be found later in the sentence as part of a prepositional phrase. Readers will find this arrangement less clear. Example of passive voice: The decision was made by the executive committee. Example of passive voice: The decision was made by the executive committee. Example of active voice: The executive committee made the decision. Example of active voice: The executive committee made the decision.

Practicing Good Style Print this page or copy by hand. Mark the parts of speech that you recognize in the following sentences. (Verbs, subjects, present participles, infinitives, prepositional phrases) Print this page or copy by hand. Mark the parts of speech that you recognize in the following sentences. (Verbs, subjects, present participles, infinitives, prepositional phrases) 1. I wrote to the manufacturer. 2. The report is late. 3. Studying your findings, I come to the same conclusion. 4. I am looking for the memorandum. 5. The evaluation was received last week. 6. The decision to cancel the project was made yesterday. 7. He wanted to explain the advantages.

Practicing Good Style 1. I wrote to the manufacturer. Verb = wrote (an action verb) Verb = wrote (an action verb) Subject = I Subject = I Prepositional phrase = to the manufacturer. Prepositional phrase = to the manufacturer.

Practicing Good Style 2. The report is late. Verb = is (a linking verb) Verb = is (a linking verb) Subject = the report Subject = the report

Practicing Good Style 3. Studying your findings, I come to the same conclusion. Verb = come (an action verb) Verb = come (an action verb) Subject = I Subject = I Present participle = studying (working as part of an adjective phrase) Present participle = studying (working as part of an adjective phrase) Prepositional phrase = to the same conclusion Prepositional phrase = to the same conclusion

Practicing Good Style 4. I am looking for the memorandum Verb = am looking (helping + main verb) Verb = am looking (helping + main verb) Subject = I Subject = I Prepositional phrase = for the memorandum Prepositional phrase = for the memorandum

Practicing Good Style 5. The evaluation was received last week. Verb = was received Verb = was received Subject = the evaluation Subject = the evaluation Note: This sentence is written in the passive voice.

Practicing Good Style 6. The decision to cancel the project was made yesterday. Verb = was made Verb = was made Subject = The decision Subject = The decision Infinitive = to cancel Infinitive = to cancel Note: This sentence is written in the passive voice.

Practicing Good Style 7. He wanted to explain the advantages. Verb = wanted (action) Verb = wanted (action) Subject = He Subject = He Infinitive = to explain Infinitive = to explain

The Most Important Style Rules Rules Use strong subjects and verbs. 2. Juxtapose subjects and verbs. 3. Don’t use more words than you need. **You might want to jot down these three rules since we’ll be using them with some practice sentences.

Sample Sentences for Editing: Using Style Rules 1 – 3 Study the following 9 sentences and figure out how you might improve the style of each. First identify the subject and verb in each one. (In our answers, subjects are highlighted and verbs are underlined.) First identify the subject and verb in each one. (In our answers, subjects are highlighted and verbs are underlined.) Then apply Rules 1- 3 and create better sentences. (Note: Some of these sentences can be improved a number of ways.) Then apply Rules 1- 3 and create better sentences. (Note: Some of these sentences can be improved a number of ways.) 1. The improvements were made by our senior analyst. (8 wds)

Practicing Good Style 1. The improvements were made by our senior analyst. (8 wds)

Practicing Good Style 1. The improvements were made by our senior analyst. (8 wds) Our senior analyst made the improvements. (6 wds)

Practicing Good Style 2. Clients are invited to tour our office. (7 wds)

Practicing Good Style 2. Clients are invited to tour our office. (7 wds)

Practicing Good Style 2. Clients are invited to tour our office. (7 wds) We invite clients to tour our office. (7) We invite clients to tour our office. (7) Clients may tour our office. (5) Clients may tour our office. (5) Clients frequently tour our office. (5) Clients frequently tour our office. (5)

Practicing Good Style 3. Our revised goals were communicated through our 2013 Revised Mission Statement. (11 wds)

Practicing Good Style 3. Our revised goals were communicated through our 2013 Revised Mission Statement. (11 wds)

Practicing Good Style 3. Our revised goals were communicated through our 2013 Revised Mission Statement. (11 wds) Our 2013 Revised Mission Statement states our revised goals. (9) Our 2013 Revised Mission Statement states our revised goals. (9) We state our goals in our 2013 Revised Mission Statement. (10) We state our goals in our 2013 Revised Mission Statement. (10)

Practicing Good Style 4. Ways for correcting the problem were discussed by representatives of three departments. (12 wds)

Practicing Good Style 4. Ways for correcting the problem were discussed by representatives of three departments. (12 wds) (Note: “Ways” is a weak subject.)

Practicing Good Style 4. Ways for correcting the problem were discussed by representatives of three departments. (12 wds) Representatives from three departments discussed ways for correcting the problem. (10) Representatives from three departments discussed ways for correcting the problem. (10) Three department representatives discussed solutions. (5) Three department representatives discussed solutions. (5)

Practicing Good Style 5. The figures given to us by the federal government do not match the figures in our office. (17 wds)

Practicing Good Style 5. The figures given to us by the federal government do not match the figures in our office. (17 wds)

Practicing Good Style 5. The figures given to us by the federal government do not match the figures in our office. (17 wds)  The federal government’s figures don’t match ours. (7)

Practicing Good Style 6. The results of the survey distributed in November of 2012 were analyzed by our staff members and their findings were distributed to all board members. (25 wds)

Practicing Good Style 6. The results of the survey distributed in November of 2012 were analyzed by our staff members and their findings were distributed to all board members. (25 wds)

Practicing Good Style 6. The results of the survey distributed in November of 2012 were analyzed by our staff members and their findings were distributed to all board members. (25 wds)  Our staff members analyzed the November 2012 survey results and distributed their findings to all board members. (17 wds)

Practicing Good Style 7. The accomplishments of this office are mentioned in the article published in the Los Angeles Times. (16 wds)

Practicing Good Style 7. The accomplishments of this office are mentioned in the article published in the Los Angeles Times. (16 wds)

Practicing Good Style 7. The accomplishments of this office are mentioned in the article published in the Los Angeles Times. (16 wds)  The Los Angeles Times article mentioned our office’s accomplishments. (9 wds)

Practicing Good Style 8. A comprehensive inspection report was generated by both engineering staff and inspection staff to find out the structural integrity of the trailers.

Practicing Good Style 8. A comprehensive inspection report was generated by both engineering staff and inspection staff to find out the structural integrity of the trailers. (22 words)

Practicing Good Style 8. A comprehensive inspection report was generated by both engineering staff and inspection staff to find out the structural integrity of the trailers. (22 wds) Both engineering staff and inspection staff completed a comprehensive inspection [report] to determine the structural integrity of the trailers. (18-19 wds) Both engineering staff and inspection staff completed a comprehensive inspection [report] to determine the structural integrity of the trailers. (18-19 wds)

Practicing Good Style 9. Generator 2 was installed in 1978 under contract 766 along with Generator 4. (13 words)

Practicing Good Style 9. Generator 2 was installed in 1978 under contract 766 along with Generator 4. (13 words)

Practicing Good Style 9. Generator 2 was installed in 1978 under contract 766 along with Generator 4. (13 wds) We installed Generator 2 under contract 766 along with Daft 4. (11 wds) We installed Generator 2 under contract 766 along with Daft 4. (11 wds) Our department installed Generators 2 and 4 under contract 766. (10 wds) Our department installed Generators 2 and 4 under contract 766. (10 wds) Under contract 766, the department installed Generators 2 and 4. (10 wds) Under contract 766, the department installed Generators 2 and 4. (10 wds)