What is Deception? Deliberate attempt to lead others to a belief; Any attempt to hide or misrepresent the truth; Any attempt to deceive another; Making a false statement; Not giving someone information you know they would want
Why Do We Do It? Power gain Tension avoidance Conflict reduction Saving face
Power Gain Children lying to gain power over their parents - Im going to call the cops and tell them you beat me up if you dont give me… Parents lying to gain power over their child or children - If youre naughty, Santa wont bring you anything for Christmas.
Power Gain (cont.) Siblings lying to gain power over one another - Ill tell mom, you broke her vase because she believes me more.
Tension Avoidance A wife asks her husband, "Was there any other woman at the party whom you thought was more attractive than me?" -He lies by claiming she was the most attractive when she was not. -He does not want to make her jealous, and he does not want to deal with her having such feelings…
Conflict Reduction The most familiar example is the servant who says to the visitor, "Madame is not at home," meaning, "Madame does not want to see you. Picking words that are vague or open- ended to use during conversation
Saving Face Faking an orgasm during sex to save face for their spouse
Why Does It Work? Truth-bias Motivation: Historical aspect Politeness
Truth-Bias The targets of lies, often unwittingly, collusively want to believe the liar…not wanting to recognize impending disaster… Parents unwittingly strive to avoid detecting their childs use of drugs because discovering it would force them to face the fact that they may be bad parents.
Truth-Bias (cont.) It is only the paranoid who foregoes… peace of mind, and those whose lives are actually at some risk if they are not constantly alert to betrayal... would look for deception
Motivation: History Those who have more to lose work harder -China: Those caught cheating on their spouse were drowned or stoned so naturally the deceiver would be much more motivated to not get caught
Motivation: History (cont.) - In the U.S. and European countries: children caught in a lie would be spanked by their teacher or parents such as in the popular old saying, spare the rod, spoil the child which motivates the child to be better at deceiving
Politeness Preschool children… understand absolute prohibitions and often become skilled at detecting and denouncing the lies of others. This becomes a source of social embarrassment, and the child, having learned not to lie, has to learn that lying is a part of life and a requisite of good manners.
Politeness (cont.) Ralphie in A Christmas Story is forced to don the bunny suit and say thank you for his unwanted present
Politeness (cont.) Children being told not to point out if -Granny breaks wind -Auntie has stinky breath
Politeness (cont.) White lies and Euphemisms -Rather than saying that someone in the family died, they are said to have passed or went with God
Who are the best lie detectors? …[there is] evidence that abused children living in an institutional setting were more accurate than other children in detecting lies from demeanor
Conclusion Collectively we are terrible at detecting lies -Those who lie and deceive are very motivated to do so whether it is for personal gain or to smooth out wrinkles in their relationships will work harder to do so -They are also more motivated because being caught would result in punishment -The truth-bias and the desire to avoid impending doom -Politeness dictates that we ignore certain information
Bibliography Ekman, Paul. "Why don't we catch liars?(Truth-Telling, Lying and Self-Deception)." Social Research 63.n3 (Fall 1996): 801(17). 3 Mar Ekman, Paul. O'Sullivan, Maureen. "Who Can Catch A Liar?." Who Can Catch A Liar?. 10 Mar Mothersill, Mary. "Some questions about truthfulness and lying." Social Research 63.n3 (Fall 1996): 913(17). 3 Mar