Don’t Wait…Communicate! The Turning Point Rape Crisis Center of Collin County Counseling • Education • Advocacy Don’t Wait…Communicate! A Parent’s Guide for Talking to Kids about Healthy Relationships Samantha G. Wyman, BSW Community Education Coordinator

The Turning Point Services The mission of The Turning Point is to provide counseling, education, advocacy for those impacted by sexual assault. All of our services are FREE!!!

Relationships are Confusing

Abusive Behaviors Wanting to get serious quickly and refusing to take no for an answer Jealously or possessive behaviors Controlling, not taking opinions of others seriously and always checking up on dating partner Using threats and put-downs when alone or with friends Using guilt trips Blaming the victim for what is wrong Apologizing or giving excuses for violent behavior

Warning Signs of Abuse School: failing grades, dropping out of school or activities Attitude: difficulty making decisions, changes in personality, acting out or being secretive, avoiding eye contact, getting hysterical, constantly thinking about dating partner Physical Appearance: bruises, scratches, or other injuries, sudden changes in clothes or make-up Activities: avoiding friends or changing peer groups, giving up activities, interests, or family time that previously was important, changes in eating or sleeping habits, using alcohol, tobacco or other drugs Pregnancy: some teenagers believe that having a baby will help make things better, some girls are forced to have sex.

If You Suspect Abuse Report Suspected Child Abuse At 1-800-252-5400 Give your teen a chance to talk. Listen to the whole story. Tell them you are here to help, not to judge them. If they don’t want to talk find another adult that you both trust for them to talk to. Focus on your child’s safety and self-esteem. Rather than putting down the abusive partner, focus on how unhappy the child seems and the potential for harm. Let your child know that abuse is often progressive. Report Suspected Child Abuse At 1-800-252-5400 Or Online At http://www.txabusehotline.org/

Trying to Break Up Encourage your child that the break up should be final. Develop a safety plan with your teen ahead of time. Support your teens decision and be ready to help. Make sure your teen takes safety precautions. He or she should avoid being alone. They may consider changing their school schedule. Speak to a school counselor or administrator for help ensuring safety at school.

Respectful Disagreements Good Communication equality Acceptance Respect Fun Fairness Respectful Disagreements Safety Honesty

It’s never too early or too late to talk to your teen about respect: respect for self and for others.

Encouraging a Healthy Relationship Encourage open, honest and thoughtful conversation. Allow teens to express their expectations and values regarding relationships. This is an ongoing process rather than a one-time conversation. Be sensitive and firm. Keep in mind the pressures and risks that teens face. Take a clear stand. Utilize “teachable moments.” Accentuate the positive rather than just risk factors or negative consequences. Be an active participant in your teens life. Talk about how to be a friend. Help them learn how to stand-up for and help friends.

Questions? The Turning Point The Turning Point 24 Hour Crisis Hotline Rape Crisis Center of Collin County Counseling • Education • Advocacy Questions? The Turning Point 24 Hour Crisis Hotline 1-80-886-7273 For more information go to www.theturningpoint.org

The Turning Point Website Resources http://www.talkingwithkids.org/first.html http://www.kidshealth.org http://www.expectrespectaustin.org/parents/ http://www.loveisrespect.org/ http://www.startstrongteens.org/resources/parents The Turning Point Website http://www.theturningpoint.org 24 Hour Crisis Hotline 1-800-886-7273