Choice Theory & Reality Therapy In Action Dr. Ali Sahebi (Ph.D) March 2010

EMPHASIS Choice Responsibility Evaluation

BEHAVIOUR We choose our behaviours to satisfy our needs at any given time A person’s behaviour at any given time is their best effort to meet their needs Behaviour is holistic/total – acting- thinking – feeling – physiology, and most of these are choices

Behaviour contd./… Originates from within and not form some external stimuli Emphasis on choice of and responsibility for our behaviour

TOTAL BEHAVIOUR (holistic) Acting Thinking Feeling Physiology Most of them are choices

NEEDS Survival Belonging and Love Power Freedom Fun A person’s behaviour at any given time is their best effort to meet their needs

Survival To survive as individuals and as a species Physical needs for food, water, air, safety, shelter, Need for a sense of security in respect of the on-going provision of basic needs

Love and Belonging Need to love and care for others To believe that we are loved and cared for Unsatisfactory or non-existent ‘connections’ with people are the major source of all almost all long-term human problems (Glasser ,1998) Whatever the presenting problem disconnectedness according to Glasser will be the underlying cause or issue

Power/Self-Worth Need for a sense of empowerment, worthiness, self-efficacy and achievement Need to be able and capable It implies a sense of achievement, accomplishment, pride, importance and self-esteem

Freedom Need for Freedom Independence and autonomy The ability to make choices To express oneself freely Freedom Internal blocks to freedom External blocks to freedom

Fun The desire to enjoy school (a job) To have a sense of humour To engage in a hobby To have a feeling of excitement about a work project or a leisure time activity Fun is the internal payoff for learning Important in relationships

NEEDS - WANTS Needs genetic instructions’ are common to all people Wants are the way we meet our needs If a person’s behaviour is their best way of meeting their needs What needs is the behaviour meeting? Are there more effective ways of meeting the need? Can we engage in a collaborative effort to find better ways of meeting this need?

SPECIFIC WANTS Human beings develop specific wants Each person, as they grow and interacting with family and culture develop specific and unique wants as to how needs are to be met We have wants related to each need These are analogous to pictures in that each one is specific

Responsibility By helping clients to take responsibility for their behavioural choices rather than accepting that they are victims of their own impulses, past history, other people or present circumstances they are able to make dramatic chances. We are influenced by the past but not controlled by it.

Emphasis An effort to teach, encourage and help clients to take responsibility for their behaviour Personal responsibility is at the heart of therapeutic change

OUR QUALITY WORLD The people we want to be with The things we most want to own or experience The ideas or systems of beliefs that govern our behaviour Our assumptions

PICTURE ALBUM Contains pictures that meet a specific need Love Are the pictures realistic? Do they need to be changed? Am I prepared to change them? In conflict, compromise is necessary.

PICTURE ALBUMS We control our mental images or pictures Put them in, exchange them or throw them out We always have the option of choosing some more positive behaviour

Contd./… This extensive collection of pictures or wants is called a ‘mental picture album (Glasser, 1984) and the ‘quality world’ (Glasser, 1990)

Quality World What does it mean when we change what is in our quality world? Persons Situations Believes

BELIEF SYSTEM Much of my behaviour is a response to external signals Other people can control how I think, feel and act I have a right to punish others who do not do what I want them to do

SUCCESS IDENTITY Effective and need fulfilling behaviour Able to give and receive love Experience a sense of self worth Involved with others in a caring way Meet their needs in ways that are not at the expense of others

FAILURE IDENTITY See themselves as unloved, unwanted, rejected Unable to become intimately involved with others Unable to make and stick with commitments Are generally helpless

THEORY Discounts the concept of mental illness Focuses on moral issues Past is largely ignored in favour of the present Does not recognise transference Unconscious is largely ignored

CHOICES - Depression Continue to depress yourself Change what you are doing to get what you want Change what you want Change both what you want and what you are doing to get what you want

We can even choose misery Why is depression a choice? Why would a person choose to be depressed? What are the advantages/gains of being depressed? We should always look at secondary gains in relation to choice

Reasons for choosing misery To keep angering under control To attract help To excuse not taking action To control others Never let anyone control you by the pain and misery (s)he chooses for themselves

Counselling - School For a successful counselling relationship (therapeutic alliance) the counsellor should be in the client’s quality world School should be in the client’s quality world We can change what is in our quality world, put new persons/things in and take persons/things that are already there out.

Goals of Reality Therapy Teach choice theory for understanding behaviour Raise awareness of choosing misery Increase client’s sense of responsibility Assist clients to have realistic pictures in their albums to meet their needs Assist in implementing new behaviours

Practice of Reality Therapy Building an appropriate relationship Evaluate present behaviour Look at possible alternatives for getting what the client wants out of life Selecting alternative for reaching goals Develop a behavioural plan Not giving up

Build Relationship Listen for themes Summarise and focus Use attending behaviours Suspend judgement Do the unexpected Use humour Establish boundaries Share self Listen for metaphors Listen for themes Summarise and focus Allow consequences Allow silence Show empathy Be ethical Create anticipation and communicate hope

Contd./… Don’t argue Don’t boss manage Don’t criticise or coerce Don’t demean Don’t encourage excuses Don’t instil fear Don’t give up easily

WDEP SYSTEM Discuss wants and perceptions Discuss directions and doings Self evaluation Formulate a plan of action

Discuss Wants & Perception Wants Questions Ask clients what they want? Ask what they want to avoid? Ask what they want regarding needs? Ask who they want to be? Ask how they see (perceive) their control, themselves and the others?

Discussion of Direction Ask Clients About Their Overall Direction. Where is the accumulation of your current choices taking you? Are you headed in a direction where you want to be in a month, a year, 2 years? As Glasser stated, “ Ask client…about the direction they would like to take their lives?

Self Evaluation Self Evaluation is the heart, the essence, the most important component, the quintessential segment of the delivery system. Glasser (1972) described SE as “the basis for Change” “If there is a specific time in Reality Therapy when people begin to change, it is when the client evaluates what he or she is doing and begins to answer the question, “Is it helping?”

Self Evaluation contd./… People do not change until they decide that what they are doing does not help them accomplish what they want (Glasser, 1980). Self Evaluation is the keystone in the arch of procedure. It holds the other together, and if it is to removed, the arch crumbles (Wubbolding, 1990, 1991)

Self-evaluation Questions Is your overall behaviour taking you where you want to go? Is this specific action to your best advantage? Is what you tell yourself really helping you? Is what you want realistically attainable?

Plan of Action Ask Clients to make plans to more effectively fulfill their wants and needs without infringing on the rights of others to do the same

Plan of Action Successful planning is SMART: S: Simple, small and Specific M: Measurable A: Aligned with wants R: Realistic (reasonable and responsible) T: Time Framed ** Written in the present tense as if it has already occurred

Plan of Action Questions What else can you Do? What (action) steps will you need to accomplish your goal? What resources do you need? What knowledge or skills you need to accomplish this goal? How will you know if the plan is successful?

Questions What do you want? What are you doing? Is what you are doing getting you what you want? If not are there other thing you could do? Which of these would you like to try first? When?

APPROACH Let’s begin by talking about what you have been doing to solve the problem In what way is it helping? Is your behaviour in touch with reality? Is what you are doing the responsible thing to do? Is your behaviour effective? If your behaviour is not getting you what you want, what would you like to do differently? Will we make a plan?

CENTRAL TAKS To assist clients in evaluating their behaviour in the context of meeting their needs. What do you really want? Is what you are doing getting you what you really want? Are there other better ways of getting what you want? What are some of these other ways?

Format What did you do? What is our agreement about that What were you supposed to do? What are you going to do next time? Do you want to write out the plan or will I do it for you Let’s check tomorrow (next week) on the plan

Basic Steps Establish a relationship Identify the problem Evaluate present behaviour Develop a plan that will help to resolve the problem Obtain commitment for the plan Structure for evaluation of the plan

DEVELOPING AN ACTION PLAN The ‘action stage’ of the ‘Egan Model’ will be helpful here: Goal setting and scenario setting Balance sheet Brainstorming and selection Shaping a plan Forced field analysis

MEETING NEEDS NEED HOW DID I MEET IT? Survival Belonging and love Power Freedom Fun

MEETING NEEDS HOW DID I FACILIT ATE n.. IN NEED MEETING NEEDS Survival Belonging and love Power Freedom Fun

Contribution Short-term therapy Clients self-evaluation and plan People are responsible for who they are and who they are becoming Clients sense of control

LIMITATIONS: No focus on the unconscious, dreams, transference People choose disorders; depressing Plans for how someone should live their life should be made jointly and not just by the therapist

READING Glasser, W. (1986) Choice Theory in the Classroom New York, Harper Collins Glasser, W. (1992) The Quality School , New York, Harper Collins Glasser, W. (1993) The Quality School Teacher,New York, Harper Collins Glasser, W. (1998) Choice Theory,New York, Harper Collins

Cont’d./… Glasser, W. (2006) Every Student Can Succeed, Chatsworth, CA, Wikkiam Glasser Inc. Nelson-Jones, R. (1995) The Theory and Practice of Counselling, New York, Cassell. pp 92-109 Wubbolding, R. (1988) Using Reality Therapy, New York, Harper and Row.

Contd./… Wubbolding, R. and Brickell, J. (1999) Counselling with Reality Therapy. Oxford, Speechmark Publishing