Are you positive ? Dr. Declan Aherne Clinical Psychologist, Sports Psychologist and Psychotherapist. University of Limerick and Oakwood Psychological Services, Castletroy.
Aim of this talk To learn how to promote confidence, as a necessary part of any prospective job seeker.
A positive attitude Is what employers look for Is what makes an impression Is what will sustain you in your search
On being positive Take stock of your talents : What are the three strongest talents that you have to offer an prospective employer.
Crisis = danger + opportunity.
FEAR OF SUCCESS ‘The Jonah Syndrome’ ( Maslowe) We fear our highest possibility. We are generally afraid to become that which we can glimpse in our most perfect moments. Why,because it takes courage.
Confidence is due to How you think. What you focus on. How you react to events.
Myths about confidence Only positive feedback can build confidence. Either you have it or you don’t Success always builds confidence Mistakes inevitably destroy confidence Confidence means outspoken arrogance
Self-talk Your thoughts determine how you feel: Think negative – feel negative, anxious, self-doubt. Think positive – feel confident You need to listen to yourself- what do you tell yourself ?
Mistaken beliefs Perfection is essential Catastrophizing Worth depends on achievement Fallacy of fairness and ideal conditions Blaming
Typical Thinking Errors 1. All or nothing thinking e.g. if I don’t get this job, I’m no good. 2. Overgeneralising e.g. I’ll never get a job. 3. Dwelling on the negative e.g. my cv is limited. 4. Disqualifying the positive e.g. I was lucky to be called for inteview.
Typical thinknig errors contd. 5. Jumping to conclusions. e.g. I know I wont get that job 6. Emotional reasoning. e.g. I feel I’m no good. 7. Should statements. e.g. I should have a job by now. 8. Personalisation e.g. its my fault I’m out of work.
The art of self talk Knowing what words to use and what words not to use ‘should’, ‘must’ and ‘have to’ are out, ‘can’ and ‘will’ are in.
The 3 Steps to positive self-talk 1.Identifying your negative thoughts 2.Challenging and correcting your negative thoughts / thought stopping. 3.Developing your own positive affirmations
Challenging you negative thoughts and beliefs Are beliefs based on objective reality Are they true all of the time ? Do you want to have these beliefs ? Are they helpful ? Do they help you reach your goal ? Do they help you feel confident ? Are there alternative ways of thinking about the situation that are more helpful ?
Positive thinking I can get this job. I’m as good as anyone else. Not everyone good enough will get selected, which is no reflection on them as a person. I have many strengths. I have been selected for interview because I’m good enough. The job is available for the taking, someone must get it and I’m as worthy as anyone else. Regardless of how I get on, I still value myself and believe in myself and my ability. I will continue striving to improve myself all of the time. I am deserving of work, I know I am very capable and I will continue to seek jobs until I succeed.
The challenge Trust yourself. Back yourself Be inspired. Be heroic and courageous.
Staying positive in your job search Plan your work day Hang out with positive people Know your support networks Learn from the past Self-improve Keep your goals clearly in front of you Take a break, get out, get involved. Focus on yourself rather than on the economic climate Persist in the face of adversity Approach the interview as a sales pitch
Success ‘ it isn’t how much talent you have that makes you successful; but your ability to use all the talent you have to reach your full potential’ ( Carl Lewis, winner of 10 Olympic gold medals ).
Hard Work gets results I’m an ordinary bloke who has worked hard at his job. That’s the thing that motivates me, I’ve seen where I can get with hard work. (RO’G)