Nyob zoo diary Dear diary Mai

Nyob zoo diary: (Dear diary: Thailand camp) Kuv twb tau nyob rau hauv no thoj nam tawg rog camp rau ib tug thaum lub sij hawm tam sim no. Kuv twb pom muaj coob tus neeg thoj nam tawg rog tawm hauv no thiab mus rau sab nraum lub ntiaj teb no. Kuv tus phooj ywg zoo tshaj plaws pÅ Nhia yuav tsiv rov qab rau loas vim nws txiv ntxawm. Kuv hlub paub li cas los mus xav seb qhov chaw no. Kuv Pog, tag nrho nws xav ua yog los qhia kuv yuav ntau hmong. Tiam sis tag nrho cov ive tau yog hmong, kuv xav tshawb sim tej yam tshiab, thiab mus rau America. Kuv Pog tsis xav kom tawm, nws ntxub sim tej yam tshiab nws paub nws tsis nyiam. (I've been in this camp for a while now. I've seen many people leave this camp and go to the outside world. My best friend Pa Nhia might move back to Laos because of her uncle. I don't know what to think of this place.) (My Grandma, all she wants to do is to teach me to be more Hmong. But all I’ve been is Hmong, I want to explore try new things, and go to America. My Grandma doesn’t want to leave, she hates trying new things she knows she won’t like.)

America: New years (soon) I been in America for long time now. America strange place. Many many people here. I have tried many new foods, like pizza. Grandma hates this place. She think this place is bad luck, she doesn’t like America. Grandma been so selfish lately. She never think about others. I admire Heather and Lisa because they both understand that I like change. Grandma doesn’t want me to change. She think that I need learn more Hmong traditions, but I don’t want to anymore. Heather and Lisa help me with my English when I say things wrong, but Grandma don’t care anymore. I get in many fights with her now. She wont even let me go to the new year’s party with Heather and Lisa. The only friend that Grandma allows me to play with is Yer. She’s a really nice friend, and the only reason Grandma likes her is because she is more Hmong than American. I need Grandma to support me more to try new things. I wish she would.

Grandma’s death: “Yuav ua li cas muaj kuv ua” Grandma is dead. Its all my fault. I (“What have I done”) should’ve listened to her, I should’ve been with her more when she needed me, but I wasn't. Grandma always cared about me, she always made sure that I was at my most best. She’s gone now and I don’t know what to do. I loved her so much, and now I cant say anything like that to her again. Why did I try to confront her about the truth. I should’ve known it would’ve been too much for her. All I have left are my cousins and Uncle Ger. I still get letters from Pha Nhia but she’s not here right now. I still live with Uncle Ger because he’s the closest thing I have to Grandma. This will be the last time I write in you diary. You hold too many emotional memories. Good bye my friend.