ANGER Sister Fiona Bosly Kedron Brook Ecclesia

“Be angry but sin not” Eph 4 What is Anger What Anger is not The Usefulness of Anger How to make Anger work for you Anger and Depression What Scripture says about Anger

Purpose of workshop The possibility that anger, rightfully used is a unifying force By contrast, destructively used, creates disunity This may be true within the individual and within relationships

Workshop Precepts Be willing to participate both in discussions and in listening Be encouraging of one another Be sensitive to other members in your group Be aware of own tendency to either dominate session or sit back and say nothing

Workshop Precepts (cont..) Stick to the topic There is no “right” answer Confidentiality Scribe

Anger What are the first thoughts that comes to mind when you think about anger? Do you see it as a positive or negative emotion? Why? What is anger?

What is Anger An emotion that says “something is wrong”. It can be used to identify your issues. You can then express this to tell others about your personal limits, values, rules and boundaries. The respectful expression of anger is an important way to educate others about how their behaviour affects you. It can result in mutual respect between you and the other person.

What Anger is not Hostility: An attitude that contributes to the violation of another person’s rights, values, rules or boundaries. This attitude can include ruminating or brooding about another person’s real or perceived injustices toward you and ways that you can “get even” with him/her. This attitude leads to feelings of powerlessness. It can often lead to aggression or withdrawal as a way to punish others.

Aggression A behaviour, acted on with the intent to harm others, either physically or emotionally for real or imagined “wrongs” done to you. This behaviour always results in disrespect for yourself and the other person. It creates distance and distrust & a climate where the goal is to ‘win’ at the other person’s expense regardless of the cost.

Distortions of Anger Blaming Sarcasm Violence Vindictiveness Viciousness

Distortions of Anger (cont.) Aggression Sulking Manipulation Scapegoating Punitiveness

Break Anger Exercise Do you fight Fair

How to make Anger work for you Anger Iceberg Depression Anger Management model

Personal Buildup How would you know you were angry? What would you notice first that told you that you were getting angry? What would you experience in your body? What would your thoughts be like? How would you behave? What would you be feeling inside?

Scriptural Examples Genesis 4:5-6 – Cain 1 Kings 21:4 – Ahab 1 Samuel 20:30 – Saul Genesis 3 –Adam and Eve Genesis 27:45 – Esau Jonah 4:4 – Jonah

Scriptural examples John 2:13-17 – Jesus Genesis 31:36 – Jacob Nehemiah 5:6 – Nehemiah Exodus 11:8 – Moses Genesis –God

Closing Remarks Feedback – better understanding of anger? - better understanding of personal use of anger Usefulness of these sessions What improvements Handouts of materials used