Kick it Up a Notch: Fulfilling Your Dreams Ed Jacobs, Ph.D. Chris Schimmel, Ed.D. West Virginia University

What Is Your Dream? What Is Your Dream?

Are You Living Your Professional Dream Do you love what you are doing? Do you love what you are doing? Why did you go into the counseling field? Why did you go into the counseling field? Are you having the memorable moments you thought you were going to have? Are you having the memorable moments you thought you were going to have? How excited are you about being a counselor? How excited are you about being a counselor?

Our Dream To Do A Good Job Helping Our Clients and Our Students to Reach Their Dream To Do A Good Job Helping Our Clients and Our Students to Reach Their Dream A Special Dream: To Work Together A Special Dream: To Work Together Our Ultimate Dream is to Enjoy Our Lives and Have Fun While We Are Here. Our Ultimate Dream is to Enjoy Our Lives and Have Fun While We Are Here.

Purpose of this Talk Motivate you; get you to do some self-reflection Motivate you; get you to do some self-reflection Provide techniques and information Provide techniques and information Provide some new ideas—simple systems to use Provide some new ideas—simple systems to use Share ideas that we think everyone should know Share ideas that we think everyone should know Get you to reflect on the theme of the conference: dreams, direction, and dedication Get you to reflect on the theme of the conference: dreams, direction, and dedication

Four M’s to Living Your Dream (to Being a Good Counselor) Multisensory Multisensory The brain likes novelty The brain likes novelty Talk to the clients eyes—not their ears Talk to the clients eyes—not their ears Motivational Motivational Marketing Marketing Maps Maps

Dedication Do You Want to be Sunday Player? Do You Want to be Sunday Player?

Give Your Counseling More Direction: Eliminate These Common Mistakes 1. Reflect much more than necessary 1. Reflect much more than necessary 2. Listen to too many stories 3. Rarely interrupt the client 4. Do not focus the session 5. Wait too long to focus and funnel session 6. Do not use theory 7. Make counseling boring 7. Make counseling boring

PROPS Shield Shield Filter Filter Cups Cups $1 bill $1 bill Exploding Coke Bottle Exploding Coke Bottle Beer Bottle Beer Bottle

Chairs Chairs Small child's chair Small child's chair Standing on the chair Standing on the chair Holding onto the chair Holding onto the chair

Important Sentences in Counseling: All behavior is purposeful. All behavior is purposeful. Thoughts cause feelings. Thoughts cause feelings. Get your expectations in line with reality. Get your expectations in line with reality. You teach people how to treat you. You teach people how to treat you. Life is a series of choices. Life is a series of choices.

Stages of Change Precontemplation Precontemplation Contemplation Contemplation Preparation Preparation Action Action Maintenance Maintenance

A Simple, Useful Map to Follow if You Currently Don’t Follow A Map Rapport Rapport Contract Contract Focus Focus Funnel Funnel

Rational Emotive Behavior Therapy THOUGHTS CAUSE FEELINGS Sustained negative feelings are caused by what we tell ourselves. Sustained negative feelings are caused by what we tell ourselves. What we tell ourselves about situations is what upsets us—not the situation! What we tell ourselves about situations is what upsets us—not the situation! REBT counselors often use a True/Not True Grid when disputing REBT counselors often use a True/Not True Grid when disputing

Rational Emotive Behavior Therapy REBT counselors use an ABC approach to helping. REBT counselors use an ABC approach to helping. A = the situation or person or event A = the situation or person or event B = the beliefs or self-talk about A B = the beliefs or self-talk about A C = feelings and behavior – the consequence of the self-talk C = feelings and behavior – the consequence of the self-talk B causes C but most people believe that A causes C.

P A C P A C

Progression of Mental Health Unconsciously Incompetent Unconsciously Incompetent Consciously Incompetent Consciously Incompetent Consciously Competent Consciously Competent Unconsciously Competent Unconsciously Competent

Effective Living Model Cheerleader vs. Fan Model Cheerleader vs. Fan Model Remember, cheerleaders never boo the players! Remember, cheerleaders never boo the players!

Writing and Drawing Lists Lists 1-10 ratings 1-10 ratings Board of directors Board of directors

Board of Directors

Three R’s Three R’s React React Retreat Retreat Rethink (Regret) Rethink (Regret) Retreat Retreat Rethink Rethink Respond Respond

WDEP W ant W ant D oing D oing E valuate E valuate P lan P lan

The Drama Triangle R V P

H A L T Don’t get: Hungry Angry Lonely Tired

Things To Know In Order to Be A Sunday Player Counseling Theories Counseling Theories Grief counseling Grief counseling Crisis counseling Crisis counseling An active approach to group counseling An active approach to group counseling OCD OCD Panic Attacks Panic Attacks Drugs and Alcohol Drugs and Alcohol Model to help Parents Model to help Parents

Questions to Ask Yourself to Give Your Counseling New Direction Are you going to enjoy your job more next week and in the following months? Are you going to enjoy your job more next week and in the following months? Are you going to be more multisensory? Are you going to be more multisensory? (Come to our workshop at noon today) (Come to our workshop at noon today) Are you going to stop listening to too many stories and have more impact? Are you going to stop listening to too many stories and have more impact?

Questions to Ask Yourself to Give Your Counseling New Direction Are you going to drive your sessions with theory? Are you going to drive your sessions with theory? Are you going to listen with a theoretical ear rather than just listen for feelings? Are you going to listen with a theoretical ear rather than just listen for feelings? Are you going to become a Sunday Player? It takes much dedication! Are you going to become a Sunday Player? It takes much dedication!

In Conclusion ENJOY THE REST OF THE CONFERENCE! ENJOY THE REST OF THE CONFERENCE! THANKS FOR HAVING US! THANKS FOR HAVING US! ED JACOBS ED JACOBS order form: order form: CHRIS SCHIMMEL CHRIS SCHIMMEL