Eight Important MONEY Decisions for Every Couple, by Russ Crosson Workshop led by Corey A. Pfaffe, CPA, PhD

Crosson: “New research indicates conflict over money matters predicts divorce better than other types of disagreement” (p. 16)

Reasons for Conflicts About Money Incorrect thinking (Ecclesiastes 5.10; Philippians 4.11; I Thessalonians 3.2-3) Lack of communication No game plan Introduction

The Purpose of Money Money is not a necessary component of our self-worth. Be careful not to believe your ability is generating your income (Deuteronomy ). A successful person may or may not have money. A person with money may or may not be a success. Chapter 1

The Purpose of Marriage One of the chief ways we can bring glory to Christ is by having harmonious, God-honoring, loving marriages. People define prosperity incorrectly and then pursue it with all they’ve got, all the while worrying little about the only asset that will last—their posterity (Ecclesiastes 5.15). Chapter 2

Reasons for Marriage Conflict In what ways are our financial backgrounds different? How do our different temperaments increase the likelihood of conflicts over finances? Chapter 3 Questions for Discussion

Work: Blessing or Curse? Your responsibility is to work hard and excellently at what God has called and equipped you to do, realizing that the income you generate is determined by Him (Colossians ). Wife (future wife), relative to your husband’s work, be content with the above reality (I Peter 3.1). Chapter 4

How Much Should We Work? Your income level is a function of your vocation(s) and isn’t necessarily dependent on working a greater number of hours. Crosson has observed that in most cases a man tends to work too much rather than too little. Chapter 5

Should Mom Work Outside the Home? Crosson has found that when child care costs are factored in Mom must make $20,000 of annual pay (in 2012 dollars) before her income is contributing to the family’s discretionary funds. Chapter 6

Who Pays the Bills? Crosson: There’s no greater way to disrupt harmony and promote disunity in a marriage than to have ‘his’ money and ‘her’ money. I interpret having separate accounts as their way of avoiding the communication that should and must take place for maximum harmony in the marriage. Chapter 7 Questions that both husband and wife should be able to answer at all times: How do we pay the bills? What bills are currently unpaid? When should they be paid? Where are our wills? What insurance policies to we have in force? How many bank accounts do we have and where are they? Questions that both husband and wife should be able to answer at all times: How do we pay the bills? What bills are currently unpaid? When should they be paid? Where are our wills? What insurance policies to we have in force? How many bank accounts do we have and where are they?

How Do We Set Up Budget Amounts? You’re only on a budget system if, at any point in time, you can answer this question: “How much do we have left to spend on [name a specific expense]?” You must have a cash cushion. Chapter 8 Three Steps to a Successful Budgeting Plan 1. Develop a monthly budget—expenses fall in three categories: a.Every pay period b.Every month c.Budget Busters sporadic throughout year—this total for the year, divided by 12 equals the amount per month that cannot be spent for categories a and b 2.Follow your monthly budget EACH pay period assigning amounts from the above three categories 3.Adopt a means to stay on track between paydays (e.g., an “envelope system”)

How Much Debt Should We Allow? Proverb 22.7; I Timothy 6.7 Chapter 9 Debt Philosophy We agree together to purposefully live below our means, not to pursue material wants without the money to afford them, never to use emergency savings for consumer purchases, and to take on debt only when it benefits the family’s long- term goals or needs. Debt Philosophy We agree together to purposefully live below our means, not to pursue material wants without the money to afford them, never to use emergency savings for consumer purchases, and to take on debt only when it benefits the family’s long- term goals or needs.

How Do We Decide Which Investments to Make? Hebrews 13.5; Proverbs ; Proverbs 13.11; Ecclesiastes A couple gets wealthy by spending less than they make. Watch out for “the sure thing” and “you must act now.” Chapter 10

How Much Should We Give? Crosson: It’s critical that couples communicate in the area of giving just as they do about investments God’s Way of Giving – God gives to us – We respond to His giving by giving thanks giving to His work and His workers giving to others Chapter 11

What is Our Strategy for Discussing Money? Crosson: “We must not let a temporal tool such as money disrupt or ruin our God-ordained relationships— our marriages.” I Peter More Crosson: Keys to effectively restoring broken communication – – take the time, be persistent, talk out the problem, and pray together – Don’t settle for a stalemate – Never take revenge Chapter 12