Helping Others to Get “Unstuck” There are many ways we can get stuck. We aren’t going to focus on all of them today. But we are going to look at some of the most imp ways that we get stuck and some of the best ways that we can help the women we work with. Why do I think this is important? I firmly believe that Gospel permeates every aspect of our life. I believe that by better understanding how we operate, the better we can work out our salvation and what the Gospel means to us. Often I see people get stuck in one area, and I think this can be empowering. Systems- when we do something in one part of ourselves it effects the rest of ourselves Body- brain, physical self Minds- will, thoughts, beliefs, values, imagination, feelings, desires Soul Reason Beliefs worth examining: What is your identity? How is it achieved/maintained? What is your problem? What is your solution/savior? What is the ideal goal/world? Examples of this Good person, and I achieve this by working hard, my problem is when I make mistakes, my solution is to try harder for the ultimate goal of not making any mistakes, or at least few enough that I am still a good person. Let’s follow that loop. I am a bad daughter/friend/wife/mother, I achieved this by my actions and this persons view of me, my problem is that I want to be a good daughter/friend/wife/mother, I am going to work at being a good daughter/friend/wife/mother, (save myself) until she thinks I reach the ultimate goal of being told I am a good daughter (judge will save me) I am single I am fat Behind every sin is a lie about who God is and often one of those Qs Must look at creator for identity

The Alm Family Eric and Beth Alm Ebagcpost.net 816.783.3481

How do you help women to get Unstuck? Objectives today are to answer the following questions: How do you see the women that you serve get stuck? How do you help women that have a difficult time speaking up? How do you help women that have a difficult time listening to others? What are some ways that we see ourselves get stuck? How do we help the women in our studies take the head knowledge that they are learning in the study and apply it in their hearts and lives?

Be alert to lies that people might believe about themselves and about God and speak the Truth!

Fact Faith/Belief Feeling Behaviors Feelings Faith/Belief Fact Behaviors

Romans 12:2New International Version (NIV) 2 Do not conform to the pattern of this world, but be transformed by the renewing of your mind. Then you will be able to test and approve what God’s will is—his good, pleasing and perfect will.

2 Corinthians 10:5New International Version (NIV)  5 We demolish arguments and every pretension that sets itself up against the knowledge of God, and we take captive every thought to make it obedient to Christ.

Philippians 4:8-9New International Version (NIV) 8 Finally, brothers and sisters, whatever is true, whatever is noble, whatever is right, whatever is pure, whatever is lovely, whatever is admirable—if anything is excellent or praiseworthy—think about such things. 9 Whatever you have learned or received or heard from me, or seen in me—put it into practice. And the God of peace will be with you. Discernment Checklist Struggling with Who God is My Father God Is- please take this list out and go around your table and take turns reading outloud the list of attributes that God is on the right side of the page God, the Father Faith Principle Unhelpful Thinking Styles Forgiveness handout

Faith Principle Faith Definition: Faith is choosing to live as though God’s Word is true regardless of circumstances, emotions or cultural trends. Naturally I would: The Truth of God’s Word says: Feel guilty In Christ, I am seen as blameless. Try to earn God’s favor In Christ, I am fully and completely loved. Believe I am not good enough In Christ, I have been chosen and able to do good works.

We Respond by asking: How would my life be different if I was living as though God’s Word were true?   Pray that your thoughts and behaviors come into line with the truth of God’s Word.

Unhelpful Thinking Styles You can run a belief that you are struggling with through the “Unhelpful Thinking Styles” test. Examples: Emotional Reasoning: “I feel like God is far away and not listening to me, so that must be true.” Should and Must Reasoning: “I should already know how to do this, so I can’t go to God for help.” Jumping to Conclusion Reasoning: “God won’t answer this prayer, or help me this time.” “This is not something that is important to God.”  If you find yourself or hear a woman that you are serving use any of these unhelpful thinking styles, it is a perfect time to apply the faith principle to these areas of life and watch God’s truth transform and renew your mind.

Practice using the faith principle at your table: Emotional Reasoning: “I feel like God is far away and not listening to me, so that must be true.” Should and Must Reasoning: “I should already know how to do this, so I can’t go to God for help.” Jumping to Conclusion Reasoning: “God won’t answer this prayer, or help me this time.” “This is not something that is important to God.” 

Pray, and pray using scripture Pray, and pray using scripture! Put on the armor of God before going into your study. 2. Spiritual warfare prayer Emotion cards Quiet Time Devotional Guide

Make your group as safe and as inviting as possible. Model unconditional love and acceptance. Allow yourself to be honest and not need to know the answers to all of the questions. Model not being upset or nervous if someone cries. When people share their struggles model and make it clear that we do not need to fix anyone. We can listen and provide comfort and empathy. Give equal attention to all of the women in the group. Set clear guidelines for the group, taking the leadership role when needed. 5. Tips for guidelines: Helpful to have a group covenant, give equal attention to all of the women in the group, not cutting each other off, keeping things confidential, sitting next to the talkative person, asking people to participate in a low risk way (reading something, close ended questions)

One common way that we can get stuck is by looking at our sin more than our Savior. Take time to worship! Hebrews 12:1&2 “ Therefore, since we are surrounded by such a great cloud of witnesses, let us throw off everything that hinders and the sin that so easily entangles. And let us run with perseverance the race marked out for us, fixing our eyes on Jesus, the pioneer and perfecter of faith. For the joy set before him he endured the cross, scorning its shame, and sat down at the right hand of the throne of God.” worship

Be as prepared as possible for your lesson, knowing the material and what questions that you would like to ask. Discussion Guide- get with the women in your study and practice this.

Pg.47 Questions to Aid in Group Discussion Pg.53 Encouraging Group Members Pg. 55 The 5 A’s of Loving Others Pg. 63 Group Leader Personal Assessment Pg. 65 Accountability Questions If there is time have them complete the group leader personal assessment.

Women in Community Mission/Vision Statement To equip and release women leaders who know and express the authentic Christ in Northwest Arkansas and the world. Discipleship defined: Truth and life transferred in the context of authentic relationship for the purpose of multiplication.