 Take Roll  Discussion – BA 8  Questions?  Tips for revising the introduction  Workshop Time  Homework for next week

 If you want to request me – I haven’t been giving my teaching schedule yet  I’m trying to do Monday mornings again › Possibly 8am and 930am  If you are already registered for 1302, and I find out what my teaching sections are in the next few weeks, if there’s room you could switch into one of them

 Due Friday 11:59pm  Objective: To develop new strategies for writing effective introductions for academic papers and to expand your understanding of what makes an effective introduction.  Purpose: The introductory paragraph of a document plays a key role in how readers respond to the entire text. In this assignment, you will attempt a revision of your introduction to Draft 1.1. Keep in mind that your original introduction may remain the better of your two efforts.  Description: Your completed assignment should contain the following:  A copy of your original introduction  Your revised introduction  A short summary and evaluation of your revisions, in which you identify and explain what you changed and why  The total length of the analysis should be words, NOT including the original and revised conclusions.

 Before you start to revise, take a few minutes to review key elements of your Draft 1.1, such as your audience, purpose, and thesis statement. Your new conclusion should reflect your consideration for each of these as well as indicate your understanding of what a rhetorical analysis accomplishes.  Next, study your original introduction and any comments that your instructors or peer critiquers made about that introduction. Using this feedback along with your broader understanding of a rhetorical analysis, revise your original introduction so that it more effectively reaches your readers.  Please note that if you need to revise for coherence, emphasis, or conciseness, refer to Chs. 40 and 43 of your e-handbook. If you need to work on sentence structure, see Chs If you need to work on other grammatical and/or mechanical elements, consult the appropriate chapters.

 Here’s how to format your BA8:  Original Introduction Paragraph:  Revised Introduction Paragraph:  Summary/Evaluation of Revisions:

 Any questions about BA8?

 There is no one, right procedure. Each paper is its own self-contained engine, designed to respond to a specific prompt. Different parts of different papers will malfunction, requiring different attention and different tools. However, making sure you have a logical chain of ideas is the best place to start. And remember that revision takes time, so leave enough time for rethinking and rewriting.

 Make sure to let the reader know you’re performing a rhetorical analysis. Otherwise, they may expect you to take positions or make an evaluative argument that may not be coming.  Clearly state what the document under consideration is and possibly give some pertinent background information about its history or development. The intro can be a good place for a quick, narrative summary of the document. The key word here is “quick, for you may be dealing with something large (for example, an entire episode of a cartoon like the Simpsons). Save more in-depth descriptions for your body paragraph analysis.  If you’re dealing with a smaller document (like a photograph or an advertisement), and copyright allows, the introduction or first page is a good place to integrate it into your page.  Give a basic run down of the rhetorical situation surrounding the document: the author, the audience, the purpose, the context, etc. "Organizing Your Analysis." Purdue OWL. Purdue, Apr Web. 9 Nov

 Ideas take precedence over style. The first step is to check that the content of the paper is logically sequenced. The paper should walk the reader step by step through your reasoning. Before you worry about making something "sound better," first make sure that you have presented the best progression of ideas. During the pre-writing phase, it is often helpful to play with the order of your ideas and see what sequence makes the most sense. During revision, revisit your earlier thinking about the order of ideas.  Changing one idea can affect many ideas. Altering one link in the chain of thought can cause a larger chain reaction than we might expect. It is always important to follow ideas to their logical end – and this is why writers sometimes hate revising. If one thing can change, everything might change. Your final product may bear little resemblance to your first draft. Try to embrace the possibility of restructuring and refinement rather than fear changes. You'll end up with a stronger paper. "Revision Strategies." Hamilton Writing Center. Ed. Michael Harwick. Hamilton College, n.d. Web. 9 Nov

 Questions about revising your introduction?

 Take out the two introduction paragraphs you brought into class › One with the commentary on it from your graders › One blank copy (without any comments)  Pair up with another person, and give them the blank introduction of yours  Peer critique only the introduction giving more feedback for them (5-10 min)  Then, using both the grader commentary and the peer’s commentary, re-write a newly revised introduction

 Similar to this past week’s homework  Bring in two copies of a significant body paragraph from your 1.1 draft › One with grader comments on it  Choose one that had the most commentary, or you know needs the most work › And then that body paragraph without any grader commentary

 Questions about your homework?  About anything we’ve covered today?